Thursday, April 07, 2005

A Little of the Old In and Out

In: The Martha Graham Dance Company. They held a swishy event last night, and Melania Knauss -- D.Trumper's latest Eastern European whore -- presided. Fashionweekdaily's Jim Shi reports:

"This year?s softer and less rambunctious season gala opening of the Martha Graham Dance Company started off without a hitch, and on time, too, as several dozen of fashion and art's A-list crowd gathered at the New York City Center for a special performance of pieces by Martha Graham. 'I loved that third act, it was just so, so, un-modern' commented Stefano Tonchi, referring to the piece entitled Sue�o. 'Those voluminous skirts, all that black lace, it was very of the moment! Very Commes [des Garcons]!'"

"Comming" on des garcons notwithstanding (The Corsair snaps twice aggressively), below, Fashionweekdaily has captured socialites Lauren DuPont and Candy Pratts Price in repose, extolling the virtues of the rejuvenating effects of a glass of distilled Panamanian peasant blood.

04.07.05LaurenDuPontCandy%20PrattsPrice52597825

"You know what they say, sweetie: The darker the peasant, the sweeter the juice!"

Out: Bill Clinton. You just know that the question of his legacy burns Bill Clinton up inside hotter than a plate of barbecued baby back ribs smothered with Cajun spicy sauce. It is said that Clinton was steaming mad that it rained miserably at the unveiling of his center. Clinton was a flawed man, and will ultimately go down -- as he himself acknowledged -- as a "second tier" President. He lacked, like George Bush Sr, the proper idealism. According to Matt Drudge, Bill Clinton made a really lame comment on The Pope that kind of pissed me off:

"En route to Rome, Clinton told reporters the pope 'centralized authority in the papacy again and enforced a very conservative theological doctrine. There will be debates about that. The number of Catholics increased by 250 million on his watch. But the numbers of priests didn't. He's like all of us - he may have a mixed legacy.'"

No, Bill, you will have the mixed legacy. Come out of yourself for a while. Could you imagine the Pope hesitating on Rwanda? Me neither. Pope John Paul II's legacy is quite solid, my good man.

In: $21K in Child Support. 21,782.08 a month is a pretty amazing figure for child support. According to the Journal News:

"Hip-hop mogul Sean 'P. Diddy' Combs has had more than $13,000 shaved from his monthly child-support tab, thanks to a ruling announced yesterday by the state Supreme Court's Appellate Division.

"Combs will still have to pay $21,782.08 a month to his ex-wife, Misa Hylton-Brim, a stylist for such hip-hop stars as Mary J. Blige and Lil' Kim. The Westchester woman is the mother of Combs' 11-year-old son, Justin. In September, a Westchester County Family Court judge ordered Combs to pay $35,000 a month child support as well as nearly $400,000 in arrears and $60,000 in attorneys' fees.

"The new monthly payment is still more than four times what Combs, who spent most of his childhood in Mount Vernon, had been paying Brim before last year's ruling. Brim took Combs to court, saying the $5,000 she had been receiving was not enough to cover the boy's expenses."

And, baby's got a trendy NYC restaurant named after him. Crazy!

Out: 40 Liters of H2O. According to the 3AM Girls, Kate Moss has 40 liters of designer water delivered to her house daily (she prolly bathes in it):

"Good Evians! Kate Moss has 40 litres of the top-brand mineral water delivered to her home every day.
The 31-year-old catwalk queen has never been one to do things by halves - her 30th birthday bash was a blow-out of decadent proportions.

"But even so, 40 litres is one heck of a lot of water - and far more than even a top supermodel needs to drink to keep her skin in peak condition.

"Which begs the question, what on earth is she doing with all that Evian?

"Washing her smalls in it? Using it to water her pot plants? Swilling down the patio of her home in St John's Wood, North London?

"Or, as seems most likely, bathing in it? After all, London tap water is so harsh on the skin...

"'Kate is obviously very particular about what she puts in her body,' says our spy."

Well, that spy ought to be brought up on court marshal, because, like, Kate is not very particular about what she puts in her body, if you know what The Corsair means ...

In: Sins and Wickedness. Thank you to the anonymous reader who sent me this. It's got the sickness. According to CNN:

"The Prince of Wales and Camilla Parker Bowles will acknowledge their 'sins and wickedness' when their wedding is blessed by the Archbishop of Canterbury on Saturday, royal officials said.

" ... Charles and Camilla will say the prayer book confession which reads: 'We acknowledge and bewail our manifold sins and wickedness, Which we, from time to time, most grievously have committed, by thought, word and deed, Against thy Divine Majesty, Provoking most justly thy wrath and indignation against us."

The Corsair has obtained a transcript of the vows:

"Camilla Parker Bowles: I should've killed myself when he put it in me. After the first time, before, Charles promised never again. He promised, and I believed him. But sin never dies. Sin never dies. At first, it was all right. We lived sinlessly. We slept in the same bed, but we never did it. And then, that night, I saw him looking down at me that way. We got down on our knees to pray for strength.

"... I smelled the whiskey on his breath. Then he took me. He took me, with the stink of filthy roadhouse whiskey on his breath, and I liked it. I liked it! With all that dirty touching of his hands all over me. I should've given you to God when you were born, but I was weak and backsliding, and now the devil has come home. We'll pray."

"Prince Charles: Yes."

"Camilla Parker Bowles: We'll pray. We'll pray. We'll pray for the last time. We'll pray."

In: Miu Von Furstenberg. My blog wife, the magnificent Miu weighs in on the blog wars. Matt Drudge was emitting hot air, trash talking 'Spolid and Arianna Huffington out of school, so my baby had to put him in his place:

" ... Bring them on. It's called competition. While you have to consider yourself the best, why waste time dissing others. You're just coming off as egotistical.

"Of course when the Arianna Huffington group blog launches, A Socialite's Life and everyone else will have a field day making fun of it. That's part of the game. I mean, when you have contributors like Warren Beatty, Senator Jon Corzine, David Geffen, Viacom co-chief Tom Freston, Barry Diller, Tina Brown and Gwyneth Paltrow, you have to make fun of it."

And we will. But only after we tell you how crazy-sexy you are when you tell off rascals like that.


2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Melania looks like she's carrying around her own Trump property in the pics in your link.

Anonymous said...

Melania looks like she's carrying around her own Trump property in the pics in your link.