Tuesday, April 05, 2005

A Little of the Old In and Out


In: ABC Entertainment Division. Cindy Adams cryptically reported today in her column, "WHEN Ted Koppel leaves the building of his ABC-TV slot he is definitely leaving the news department and sliding down to the entertainment side." How she arrives at this conclusion (lavatory conversation with a Disney execs trophy wife at The Four Seasons?), The Corsair is baffled. But it seems just about right.

There is far too much money involved in the ABC lat night slot, which is part of the publicly traded Mouse House, to give it over to the News division in order to keep the press quiet and happy (Imagine the outcry over the Decline of Western Civilization and The State of Journalism at the J-Schools and on C-Span at 1 AM in the morning should ABC Entertainment purloin this sacred shrine of High Seriousness). How ABC turns this over to Entertainment after telling the press that the News division will keep the slot is ... a mystery. But, it will probably be done.

BTW: Whatever happened to that Howard Stern interview show for ABC?


Out: Mariah Carey. Oh dear, sweet Lord, she's doing a Mariah again. You'll want to sit your ass down for this, cornbread. Pour yourself a Grappa if you've got some. With the upcoming release of her new album, Mariah is doing every interview imaginable (Will a Corsair-Mimi sitdown be next?) in order to move product. And, as you can imagine, in the process, Mariah is starting to say ... odd things. Curious serial killer things. Like, according to ananova (via The Sun via Q):

"According to The Sun quoting Q magazine she said: 'I still believe in Santa Claus and I'm whimsical.'"

Whimsical, not musical, mind you. Further, " During the interview she also compared herself to her dog Jack. Mariah added: 'I can be professional but really I'm much more like my dog. He's a kid and so am I.'" No, no, no. You're not like a kid Mariah, you're like a crazy, magical caramel-colored goat.


In: Peter Jennings. This story really made me sad this morning. Despite the snark I've issued out to Peter Jennings over the years (Mostly concerning the Socratic excellence of his hair), I've always liked the way he does what he does. Peter Jennings projects a certain gravity, the appropriate gravity, towards world issues. According to Reuters:

"Peter Jennings, the chief ABC News anchorman for more than 20 years, has been diagnosed with lung cancer and will begin outpatient treatment next week, the network said Tuesday.

"Jennings, 66, has been feeling ill for the past several months and was replaced Saturday on coverage of the pope's death by anchor Charles Woodruff. He last anchored 'World News Tonight' on Friday.

"Jennings informed ABC News staff of the diagnosis Tuesday morning and said he will anchor the broadcast when he feels up to it over the next few months as he begins chemotherapy.

"'There will be good days and bad, which means some days I may be cranky and some days really cranky,' he told ABC News employees in an e-mail."

"... Charles Gibson, who's in Rome for the pope's funeral, and Elizabeth Vargas will be Jennings' primary substitutes on the evening news."

What is a "really cranky" Peter Jennings? Is that a Peter Jennings who uses the word "darn" unapologetically? Might an empty Dixie cup be crumpled up and tossed on the floor? Will we be witness to some Peter Jennings "sass"?

Anyway, we hope to see Peter Jennings back and competitive and, if he must, cranky, ASAP.


(image via wordsources.info)

Out: The Nuclear Option. Apparently, on top of the bevy former Senators and moderate Republicans, business leaders are now opposing the dismantling of the filibuster. TheHill reports:

"Worried that their agenda will come to a screeching halt, business leaders are urging Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist (R-Tenn.) not to exercise a bold parliamentary tactic known as the 'nuclear option' on judicial nominees.

"Industry lobbyists and association heads so far have avoided taking a public role as the debate over stalled judicial nominations escalates. Instead, they are relying on one-on-one conversations with Senate leaders, comments in meetings on other subjects, and staff contacts.

"But, according to multiple sources on K Street, the employer community has concluded that, whatever its merits, the nuclear option is not worth the price of imperiling the GOP's legislative agenda."

Cooler heads prevailed. Thank God we will never know how close we were to a "nuclear winter."

In: Fenton Bailey and Randy Barbato. How are they going to pull this one off? According to the Most Excellent Michael Musto:

"WORLD OF WONDER --the producing-directing team that recently did the documentary Inside Deep Throat -- has optioned VICTOR M. GUTIERREZ's Michael Jackson Was My Lover: The Secret Diary of Jordie Chandler."

The Corsair first encountered this book in the old offices of Paper Magazine. The copy was well worn. Very well worn. Every staffer, apparently, had had a crack at this book. The tome was like Paris Hilton that way. Favorite portions were underlined, pages were dog-eared, suggestions were offered, sarcastic and witty comments were made in the margins -- ah, the fin de siecle Paper. And so, The Corsair read the damn book. Bad idea. Nothing has ever been the same since.

There is no way to describe ... no way. And The Corsair cannot turn back to the arcadia of before the book. Long story short: If this book is real -- and The Corsair is not so sure it is, although it might be -- this movie will have to be made in fucking Morocco. Only a tyrannical regime would allow filming of this torrid man-boy love story, and even then only 8 miles off the coastline in international waters. Or, perhaps, Fenton and Randy plan on making it a cautionary tale for the Lifetime Channel, because that's the only angle The Corsair can see production happening. There cannot possibly be an angle in which this tale could be told! There is no way anything this salacious and transgressive will ever get anything less than a quadruple X rating. The Corsair returns to his opening question: How are Fenton Bailey and Randy Barbato going to pull this one off?

Oh, and message to Michael Jackson, whose trial is going intensely bad for him today: Don't drop the soap. Freak.


Anonymous said...

I must be evil but I'm just so entertained by every time Mariah goes a little nutty.

Who Me

(S)wine said...

agree w/anon re: Mariah.
sad about Jennings.
saw it coming. two or three pack a day smoker.

damit, you must have an endless supply of Grappa. swing some over my way. slummin' it with table wine and gin over here.

The Corsair said...

Wow, I didn't know Jennings was a heavy smoker. A lot of tv news guys are, though. (The Corsair pours two glasses of Grappa for LX and Anon)