Wednesday, April 27, 2005

A Little of the Old In and Out


In: Helena Christenson. How does The Corsair love this unbelievably hott woman? Let me count the ways. In an upcoming issue of Razor Magazine, The Corsair rates her one of the "10 Most Beautiful Women in the World." For now, though, according to British Vogue (link via Fashionweekdaily):

"HELENA CHRISTENSEN is all set to launch into the world of retail later this week. The Danish supermodel will open the doors of her new store, Butik, in a former bar on Hudson Street, New York, in three days time.

"Reflecting her eclectic fashion tastes, she says it will be the place to find 'everything strange and weird and wonderful and aesthetic and antique and new.' Having worn some of the most beautiful and expensive clothes in the world throughout her career, Helena does not intend this new venture to be restricted to the fashion elite. 'We're just trying to show how you can wear things differently,' goes on Helena, who plans to sell designs by the likes of Camilla Staerk as well as clothes that she and her business partner, floral designer Leif Sigersen, plan to design."

Out: Willem Defoe. Defoe is one of the best actors of his generation, hands down. Yes, his Jesus in The Last Temptation of Christ was a bit cheesy and weak, true; Defoe was, however, spectacularly evil as Bobby Peru in Wild at Heart, and creepily funny as "the hateful guard" in Cry Baby. But he is not averse to performing in a stinker. A certified stinker is what XXX2 can only be properly construed as! In something called Moviehole, Defoe defends the indefensible, namely: his work in XXX 2 (Exaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachment):

"One of the reasons I did the movie is because I love the idea of a bunch of homeboys being on tricked out military vehicles rolling down Pennsylvania Ave to save the day as the Capital Building is smoking. That?s a little jokey. .. a little jokey? it?s kitchy, but it?s a little cool too. It?s a fantasy thing and in this case, Ice Cube represents the people, ya know? It the closest thing that we have to the people. And people are alienated from the government and these people are going over to fight in foreign wars and coming back and what happens to them. All this is in them. Okay it?s a popcorn movie, but I like the fact that these elements are floating around."

Right. Keep drinking your Kool aid, Willie boy, maybe you'll actually fool yourself into believing the hype.


In: "Gravy." We have to admit it, we did a bit of a double take when we read in Rush and Molloy that a grown man actually took on the monicker, "Gravy." That's just too damned "country." Did he have a piece of hay in his mouth? Does he wear "short pants" and ride a bike? One almost expects such a man as would name himself "Gravy" (Averted Gaze) to blow on peanuts and shake them before consumption. (To take away the "bad mojo")

Anyway, here's the story:

"Foxy Brown should have packed a little less attitude before she headed to Miami last weekend.
Rapper Jacki O says the Brooklyn hip-hop queen brought a whupping on herself when she showed up at the Circle House studios to record with rapper Gravy.

"According to Jacki O, Brown took offense that no one acknowledged her when she arrived midsession.

"She [was saying,] 'You don't know who I am, you new girls coming into the game, y'all going to have to respect me,' Jacki tells us.

"Jacki said the verbal sparring quickly turned into a 'physical altercation,' with someone throwing lemonade."

We just kind of zoned off after the "Gravy" mention. Did something else meaningful occur?

Out: Drugs in the Stew. Trust means never having to slip a mickey to your mate. Honey, the fava beans taste not unlike "Special K." Ozzy, that heavy metal n'eer do well, actually drugged wifey Sharon when she wasn't aware, according to that extremely downmarket significant cultural artifact, NewsoftheWorld:

"(Ozzy) ground up addictive drugs with a pestle and mortar and slipped them into Sharon's food?sending her so crazy she would smash up their home.

"Sharon revealed: 'I couldn't control my emotions. It wasn't until months later that he told me he was putting drugs in the stew.

"'It took me a while to get over that, you know.' Now, after more than 20 years of marriage, and as Sharon and Ozzy celebrate their 52nd birthdays, more shocking secrets are finally exposed in the book which blows the lid off TV's most dysfunctional reality show family."

At what point as the meats were going down the proverbial gullet and the her reality began to morph into Fellini's Satyricon did Sharon begin to think, 'hey, has someone been putting funnystuff in my dinner?' Or maybe every day is Fellini Satyricon day for Sharon Osborne. More here.


In: Deeda Blair. You'll remember the name of Deeda Blair, Washingtonian socialite, now starting to make things happen in Manhattan, according to our favorite social chronicler, David Patrick Columbia:

"Among those present at yesterday?s (ed note: Goethe Institute) luncheon was Deeda Blair who arranged the introduction of John Buchanan, the director of the Portland Museum, to Moritz the Landgrave of Hesse. Mrs. Blair, a longtime Washington resident who is about to take up fulltime residence here in New York, served as catalyst of one of the greatest exhibiting coups ever accomplished by an American museum."


The accomplishment being The Hesse exhibition, says DPC:

"Today the Hesse family collection remains one of the greatest private collections in all of Europe. The exhibition coming to Portland in October will contain the Holbein Madonna, painted for the burgomeister of Basel Meyer von Hasen, in 1526. This Madonna of Mercy, with her cape spread out protectively over his family, escaped the Basel Iconoclasm of 1529 and reappeared with the French dealer Le Blond a century later. He had two clients, an Amsterdam bookseller and Marie de Medicis, so he sold her a copy, later acquired by the King of Saxony, while the original remained in Holland. It then reappeared in Paris in 1822, when it was bought by Prince William of Prussia, who bequeathed it to his wife, a Hesse.It will leave Germany for the first time in more than 150 years to be exhibited in America."

The Corsair so hearts Holbein (one of our favorite Old Masters), you don't even know.

Out: Sean Lennon. Yo, peep this shit out. There are two sides to every story, but Sfgate's Dish has the most interesting take on this, dig?:

"John Lennon's son Sean reportedly tried to start a fight with a punk rock bassist during an appearance at Britain's All Tomorrow's Parties festival this weekend.

"The son of the Beatles legend, who was joined by his mother Yoko Ono at Pontin's holiday resort in England's Camber Sands, allegedly took exception to the Jayne County and the Electric Chairs bassist because he was sporting a mohawk.

"The pair almost came to blows before security at the venue stepped in and defused the situation.

"Singer Jayne County says, 'It angers me that Sean Lennon, son of John -- a member of the Beatles, who I love -- can be so drunk and narrow-minded to pick a fight with my bass player because he has a mohawk.

"'He was surrounded by girls and thought my bass player was competition so he started picking on him. He was out of order and was slagging him, saying he was old and had a crap haircut.

"'I think he's insecure. Security had to step in and separate them or blood would have been spilled. The gig went brilliantly but Sean Lennon spoiled it for me. He's a loser.'"


In: Aisha Tyler. So fucking hott, this woman is. Aisha Tyler is also in The Corsair's Razor "Top Ten Most Beautiful Women" column next month. According to Reuters (link via Cinematical), she is having quite a year:

"In what has already been a busy year for her, Aisha Tyler is adding roles in a Lifetime movie and an independent feature.

Tyler, who plays a recurring character on CBS' 'CSI: Crime Scene Investigation' and Fox's '24' and a lead in CBS' John Gray pilot, is set to star opposite Raven Symone in the Lifetime film tentatively titled 'For One Night.' She also has joined Milla Jovovich, Angus Macfadyen and Stephen Dorff in Mobius Entertainment's indie project."45."

"... Written and to be directed by Gary Lennon, '.45' is described as an erotic drama set in the seamy underworld of New York's Hell's Kitchen, where a Bonnie and Clyde-like couple turn on each other. Tyler will play a court-appointed social worker who interacts with Jovovich's character. Filming is scheduled to begin this week in Toronto."

We hope Pamela Anderson's mantoy Stephen Dorff doesn't jinx this project like he has so often in the past.

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