Monday, August 23, 2004

A Little of the Old In and Out

In: Eat the Rich. Things are turning around for Paris (The Corsair puts on some crunked out slow-style Southern gangsta rap, sips a glass of Chateau D'yquem). After the burglary and the collabo-nuptials of her sister, Nicky, she finally found her darling Tinkerbell, and, by chance, it appears as if Paris has found her oats as well, as, according to Fashionweekdaily:

"Paris Hilton wears a Heatherette dress for an upcoming cover of Rolling Stone magazine that reads 'Eat the Rich' (as for where its placed, use your imagination)"

So .. is that Eat the Rich? Or, is that eat the Heatherette designer Ritchie Rich? Either way makes gives Jann The Perfect Buzz. (Actually, of the new, sleek RS Magazine, all we can do is borrow from Nicole in saying, "that's hott")

Out: Another Wintours Tale. No, no one set up popcorn machines in the Bryant Park tents. It's common knowledge that hunger causes tempers to flare with what they call in Urban Street in Philly: (air quotes) "the quickness," so, perhaps it is acceptable to the jaded Caucasian fashionistas at Conde Nast -- after the manner of the charming husband who is a "good provider," yet has his harmless "little infidelities" out of sight (Averted gaze) -- that Vogue editrix Anna Wintour is still ornery after all these years, despite her secure social position, because, according to Fashionweekdaily:

"Vogue editor in chief Anna Wintour gave fashion market director Virginia Smith less than a full work day to accept her additional new responsibility of accessories director. The role was proposed in the morning, and originally Smith was given until the end of the day to make her decision?but then, at noon, she received a call gently 'demanding' a reply (a 'no' was not an option, The Daily hears)"

How about just 'ho. Is calling one's boss who makes such an offer without options a "'ho" bad form? Yes? My bad.

In: Julia Thorne, John Kerry's Ex Wife; and her story is tres interessant. According to The Washingtonian:

"Julia Thorne, first wife of Senator John Kerry, had just written a book, A Change of Heart, about their divorce when she was interviewed by Washingtonian writer Diana McLellan in July 1996. McLellan says that Thorne was prettier than the picture we ran of her and that 'she seemed very innocent.'

"Thorne told McLellan that she was never comfortable with the pretense demanded by politics. 'When John won the primaries for the lieutenant governorship of Massachusetts, we went to do our publicity photographs with Kitty and Mike Dukakis,' Thorne recalled. 'Kitty had just come out of a rehab center, and I had just asked John for a separation?and here we were, living these enormous lies. We had to live those lies for the whole campaign.'

"Julia Thorne met Johnny Kerry when he was at Yale. Her twin brother, David, was then and remains one of Kerrys closest friends. Thorne and Kerry married in 1970, separated in 1982, and divorced in 1988. The divorce wasnt pretty, Thorne wrote in her book. She regretted arguing in front of the children, not helping John move out, and hunting for a tough divorce lawyer instead of a mediator.

"Dont expect to see Julia Thorne on the campaign trail although she has come out in support of her ex. You can read more about the Kerrys divorce but it will cost you. A copy of Thorne's book now sells for $130 or more on"

(Ed Note: Nahhhh. You can get it for $50; and I can prolly cut you a better bootleg book deal on 125th street via my friend "Pookie from around the way")

Out: Michael Jackson's Nose is Really His Ear. How fucked up is that, yo? I mean, I knew the extra cartilege had to come from somewhere, because of the particulate nature of matter, kind of like a NYC Sabrett's dirty water hot dog: you know people consume it, but you know it just isn't quite "right"; but I had no inkling that Jacko's nose was really his ear. Just when you thought we had excavated everything Jacko, that there would be no more surprises -- ka-pow! According to The Sun:

"MICHAEL Jackson's nose was saved from disintegrating thanks to tissue from his EAR, a plastic surgeon claims.

"German doctor Werner Mang (Ed Note: No relation to celebrated blogger Ron Mwangaguhunga) said aides rang him at his offices in Santa Monica, California, because the pop star's face was 'beginning to deteriorate.'

"He told how he took cartilage from Jackson's ear to replace that destroyed by repeated surgery to slim his nose.

"Dr Mang declared: 'The nose of Michael Jackson is now fine. But I think he is obsessed with aesthetic surgery, and it's dangerous for his health and his skin.

"'I think Michael Jackson wants to change from a black man to a white woman.'"

"... "He went on: 'He should have stopped after the Thriller album. After Thriller Michael Jackson was very good looking. All was OK."

Read the full story here.

In: Graham Norton, ubiquitous Chelsea and Midtown NYC presence, does not want to go back to Britain, according to The Sun, and who can blame the guy. When Graham Norton farts, the dailies celebrate it's lushness of texture with column inches, while, overlooked blogger, The Corsair (pats himself on the back) gets no respect at all (sniffs huffily):

"GRAHAM Norton is refusing to come home from America to work on his new BBC show.The comic signed a $ 6.3 million deal with the Beeb and bosses expected him to be already working on his Saturday night show, which starts in the autumn.But 41-year-old Norton, who has been in America since June doing a chat show based on his Channel 4 series So Graham Norton, says he is having too much fun to return.

"Norton said: 'The idea seemed interesting two months ago. But now that were here, we couldnt be more bored by the idea of going home. I have no interest in going home.'BBC bosses were delighted when they poached Norton from Channel 4 earlier this year.

"But he is said to be unhappy at the sort of shows he has been offered. A pal said: 'So far nothing has grabbed his attention. But in the US he?s one of the hottest rising stars.'"

The Page Six effect, The Corsair nods knowingly, as he understands. Once you get in the daily tabs, dammit, you don't ever want to leave; and you spend the rest of your time trying to get back in. Media crack, I tell you.

Out: Claudia Schiffer's Fourth Stalker. I've interviewed the fetching Schiffer, back at my old job as editor at MacDirectory Magazine, and, like the infinitely beautiful Browning's Last Dutchess (The Corsair's favorite), she inspires flirtation. But not of this type. According to British Vogue:

"CLAUDIA SCHIFFER has yet another stalker. Police were called this weekend after a 49-year-old Canadian man turned up at the front door of her $ 16.3 million Suffolk mansion, asking to meet 'the lovely Claudia'. It is thought that he had flown 3,500 miles with the sole intention of meeting her. He was taken in by the police but was released after agreeing not to try and visit Schiffer again. 'It was decided that no offence had been committed as harassment has to occure more than once,' a spokesman told CONTACTMUSIC.COM. 'He was advised to say away from the property.' Claudia, who is expecting her second child in November, was on holiday with her husband Matthew Vaughn and their son Caspar at the time of the incident. She has previously been stalked by 21-year-old Louis Brisette, Italian Agostino Pomata and Jose Bargolome, who tried to get into her Majorcan villa in 2000."

In: Hillary Clinton to Senate Banking Committee? Has anyone else heard the persistent rumor floating around Trenton that Corzine plans to push McGreevy out of office, take his place, and install Hillary Clinton in his position on Senate Banking?

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