Thursday, October 21, 2004

Trumpie Versus Cuban

All happy bilionaires resemble one another, each unhappy billionaire is unhappy in his own way. So, how do you tell them apart? Donald Trump is the megalomaniacal dude in some financial distress with the unfashionable outer borough accent, the weird pumpkin colored hair dye job and the penchant for liaisons with dodgy Eastern European whorelets; Mark Cuban, on the other hand, can only be properly construed as that dude with the creepy serial killer eyes.

Together, they make up The Corsair's two favorite feuding billionaires. So best. On Tuesday, Trump sent a personal fax to Cuban that just happened to land -- wink, wink -- into the vulture-like talons of the NY Daily News:

"Trump yesterday sent a note to Cuban, owner of basketball's Dallas Mavericks; the letter, in which Trump poked fun at 'The Benefactor,' was also obtained by The News.

"'I am truly sorry to hear that your show has been canceled for lack of ratings,' Trump wrote in the fax - ironically sent to ­Cuban at the Trump International.

"'When I initially called you to congratulate you on The Benefactor - little did you or I realize how disastrous and embarrassing it would turn out to be for you,' Trump wrote.

"Last week, ABC cut short the run of The Benefactor, in which Cuban was putting a group of people through a series of tasks with the goal of winning $1 million. The program will air for the last time on Monday."

That Trump ... he's got class ..

"'He cracks me up,' Cuban said via E-mail yesterday. 'Donald truly is a TV star, and a legend in his own mind. For that he deserves credit. The same can't be said of his business skills. From what people tell me, and by the way, these are smart people telling me this, he has never made anyone other than himself a nickel and has often lost his partners' money. Lots of money.'"

Here's what Cuban says re: Trumpie on his blog, which started off the whole hooplah:

"Q: Would you say that Donald Trump lives by the 'no balls, no babies' philosophy?

"A: It certainly doesn�t apply to Mr. Trump. He is part of the lucky sperm club. His father was very successful, and to Mr. Trump�s credit, he was smart enough to do deals built on the foundation his father built and to grow it into a bigger organization. He has had his back up against the wall with debt, but I�m not sure he has ever faced the risk of starting a business purely with sweat equity. The concept of 'no balls, no babies' is that you are starting a business with nothing. If the business fails, you go home with nothing. Any entrepreneur without outside capital and who had to hustle to stay alive knows exactly what I am talking about."

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