Monday, February 07, 2005

Kimora: "Stop the fighting ... I expect that from black people"

"This place sat 1,500. We had well over 2,000 inside and another 1,000 locked outside trying to get in,' (Kimora) Simmons, 29, says, grinning ecstatically after the show."

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Quoth "Cremora" to The Baltimore Sun. That we don't like Kimora Lee Simmons is a given. We regard Kimora Simmons as sort of the venereal discharge of Western Civilization. Okay ... maybe that went over the line (or maybe not nearly enough). Anyhoo, The NyPost reports, Feb 5th:

"A fight broke out back stage at Kimora Lee Simmons' Baby Phat Show last night. Waiting more than an hour for her arrival, tempers were running hot for the media waiting for their two minutes. The melee broke out when an overzealous CNN crew brained longtime Daily News photographer Dick Corkery."

Papparazi get all the proper beat downs. Blame the media. Too sad, this: CNN braining a Daily News photographer. What's next, Romenesko will be pimp slapping Tucker Carlson? Impromptu Thai kickboxing in the halls of Conde Nast? Can't we all just get along?

"'Stop the fighting,' Simmons cried as she put herself into the mix. 'I expect that from black people . . . I expect that from my own people.'"

WTF?! Her own people? How to classify such a picklehead! Hasn't she already admitted herself under the category of species: "fly bitch"? The dreaded Tsetse Kimora? Latin Name: Materialisticus Assholii. Plus, from the Feb 7 NyPost:

"The fallout continues from Saturday's disastrous Baby Phat show. Vogue editor-at-large Andre Leon Talley was turned away at the door because of overcrowding, while R&B star Usher was whisked in before his eyes.

"'I'm standing there to do my job, and as a friend of Russell and Kimora Lee Simmons,' Talley ranted to Buzz. 'To let Usher in because he's a celebrity, and not editors who are trying to do their job is wrong. If you want to have a party, have an after-party � a fashion show is about business. Bling-bling has gone too far.'"

Which is, more or less, what Orla Healy says here, in a bitchslap review:

"Kimora Lee Simmons is obviously confused.

"Instead of previewing the fun collection inspired by daredevil Bond girls that she promised us, last night the Baby Phat designer unveiled a line of hoo-haw looks that could only have been inspired by an X-rated bondage movie.

"Simmons' idea for fall clothes: cheeky leather hot pants, perforated leather capelets, skintight dresses and enough vinyl to keep a dominatrix in business for a year."

Lil Kim, attending the show, uncharacteristically kept her coochie covered (A sign of maturity? The Rapture?), and said, According to USAToday:

"'Photographers are taking down the house to get a picture,' Kim said as she posed at Saturday's star-studded show, one of fall 2005 Fashion Week's kickoff events."

And:

"Two seats over, fellow rapper Missy Elliott sipped champagne. To Kim's left, Ashley Olsen, clad in all black and keeping a low profile, quietly chatted with her friend, New York restaurateur Scott Sartiano. Farther down were Tori Spelling, JC Chasez (sans Eva Longoria, who was in Los Angeles at the Screen Actors Guild Awards), Shannen Doherty, teenage singer JoJo and Paula Abdul."

Ah, the requisite JoJo. It's not an event, not hardly, until there's ... JoJo. Now, The Baltimore Sun:

"'This show is what defines Fashion Week,' says Paula Abdul, who skipped an American Idol Super Bowl event in Florida so she could be where so many other stars of the hip-hop crowd ... come to see and be seen."

Paula Abdul defining anything is a recipe for misidentification. Finally, Lil Kim in USAToday:

"Kim's No. 1 rule for surviving the rounds of photo-fueled events? 'Bring your makeup and lipstick with you because it's going to come off,' she advised. 'Make sure your hair and your makeup is done proper because you will take lots of pictures and they will be everywhere and you have to live with that! I've lived with some bad pictures!'"

We know. Oh dear Lord, how we know. (NOT safe for work!!)



5 comments:

Allison Bojarski said...

Oh. My. God. Kimora. Did. Not. Say. That.

(S)wine said...

Aye! I'm speechless.
Nice photo of CREmora, though. She looks, oddly, a bit like Michelle Kwan--sans the cleavage.

Anonymous said...

We already knew she was a racist. (Those Latina maid ads weren't subtle.)But snubbing ALT? Insanity!

Zeynep said...

I'm thinking of not even posting about Kimora anymore on my blog. I think I've given her way too much attention. And can we please, just for a moment, discuss Andre Leon Tally? I know he's Anna's bitch but the man never, ever, ever wearings anything flattering or worth mentioning. - Case

starzstylista said...

Nice stretch marks.