Saturday, February 19, 2005

Have Talking Heads Jumped the Shark?

TMFTML brought this up, and The Corsair believes it is a good a time as any to discuss the prospect that maybe talking heads have jumped the shark. Okay, we've thought about it, and yes -- they have. We're not talking about the genuinely witty veterans of the sport, like Michael Musto, Mo Rocca, Juliette Lewis and Beth Littleford, who actually always have interesting things to say on whatever subject is at hand.

No, we mean the lower end of the show business food chain, the "bone gristle" -- if you will -- of the celebrity steak, the "novel," but perishable "personalities," mostly low grade pieces of ass, to be sure, we are talking about -- Molly Culver (famous for jiggling while moist with seawater) , Fucking "Nelson" (Of which, the less that is said, the better, dear reader), Vincent Pastore (Okay, like, that whole "goombah" thing? Italian "ice" consuming goodfellas at the San Gennaro festival? A sight gag at best. An unendurable thought burden at worst. Goodfella whack thyself), Countess Vaughn (Right Honorable "Countess" of goddamned what? Obtusity?), the loathsome Jason Mewes (Venereal, and his catchphrases are spreading through the public school system at bacterial velocity), Tommy Davidson (The comedian who wants to have Teddy Pendergrass' career so bad that we actually ache for him). The usual suspects. Why are they filling the cable airwaves with their inane blather? Is Western civilization truly in that advanced a state of decline? At what point do we stand athwart the tide of asshole chatter yelling "Stop"!

Those intrepid Page Sixxies lead the attack, with a divinely inspired suckerpunch to the kidneys:

"THE VAPID state of pop-culture punditry on cable networks like VH1, MTV and E! is due for a good skewering, so we're looking forward to Marc Spitz's 'The Name of This Play is Talking Heads.' Spitz's seventh play takes place backstage at a music channel where a rock journalist prepares to spew soundbytes on the 'Top 100 Most Rockatrocious Moments in Rock History.' When he witnesses how producers are force-feeding their unqualified 'experts' material and telling them what to say, he decides to expose the corrupt system, risking potentially fatal consequences."

We are so there.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

God dude- I thought you were talking about the band... and David Byrne would be soooo pissed...