Wednesday, June 08, 2005

A Little of the Old In and Out (yesterday's edition, sorry for the tech glitch)


Above: Whitney and Bobby to Prime Minister Sharon: Yo, Ariel, check it: instead of a Peace Pipe, why don't we just smoke some crack?" (image via kingdonofyah)

In: The Bobby Brown Reality Show. The brilliant gang at World of Wonder scored an exclusive clip of the new Bobby Brown Reality Show on Bravo. This shit is off the hook all-the-way live. The Corsair cannot stress to you enough how fucking good this show is going to be.

In the clip we see what can only be construed as a "synchronized dancing" between the -- how does one put this nicely? -- incredibly ghetto duo of Whitney and Bobby. Also, Bobby Brown buys Preparation H hemorrhoid cream from a the Atlanta Hyatt Hotel Gift Shop, explaining to the startled Southeast Asian clerk it's uses. Here's some of the home remedy "dialogue":

"(Over sleazy background flute music) Bobby Brown: Do you have Preparation H? I don't need it for my butt, though. Nah. (Absently) I don't need it for my butt. They say Preparation H, when you put it under your eyes, it takes away the swelling.

(Clip of Bobby applying the hemorrhoid cream under his eyes)

"See, I had a late night last night. I hadn't seen my wife in ... thirty something days .... (cocky exhale) .. you know, this is how we do (it)"

(Whitney Houston enters, dancing, freshly fucked)

"Whitney Houston: (Chirpy) ... Chello!

"Bobby Brown: Baby, I need to go; I need ...

"Whitney: (Mockingly) I need, I need ... (Claps hands, starts bobbing and weaving; pretty soon Bobby joins in -- words get in the way)

(Bobby and Whitney proceed to do a little synchonized fancydancing)

Too fucking brilliant.


(image via

Out: Katherine Harris. Actually, The Corsair is stunned that Katherine Harris actually curbed her massive and unsavory lusts for power this long, settling for a mere Congressional seat in the 13th District of Florida instead of galactic conquest. We know that the former realtor has in the recent past salivated over former Senator Graham's vacated seat, but Karl Rove and the President handpicked the less controversial Mel Martinez instead. How her Will-to-Power must have seethed within her savage breast. She is running for Bill Nelson's Senate seat, according to The Hill:

"In a statement yesterday, the second-term Florida congresswoman confirmed speculation that she will seek the Republican nomination to challenge incumbent Democratic Sen. Bill Nelson.

�?'Today, after months of encouragement from friends, constituents and advisors, many prayers and the love and support of my family, the time has come to launch a campaign for the United States Senate,' Harris said in the statement.'I will formally announce my candidacy, and key members of my campaign team, in July,' the statement added.

"Nelson�?s office countered the Harris announcement with its own statement, the first barb in what could be a bitter, hard-fought race.'In over three decades of public service, Bill Nelson always has always strived to help everyday people and has represented mainstream Florida values,' said Dan McLaughlin, a spokesman for Nelson. 'Katherine Harris represents only the radical right.'"


Above: Matt and Annette Lauer, Caryn Lerner, and Hal Rubenstein (image via NYSocialDiary)

In: Annette Roque Lauer. All the swell set showed up for Madonna's cocktail party and book signing of Lotsa De Casha at Bergdorf Goodman. While most everyone kissed Madonna's ass with varying degrees of moistness, Annette Roque Lauer had the most interesting line of the evening, IMHO. Says Fashionweekdaily:

"The Material Girl, clad in a Dolce & Gabbana chiffon dress, Prada heels, a vintage necklace, earrings and bracelets from Kentshire estate jewelers, and a clutch she picked up at Bergdorfs, walked the red carpet for a good 40 minutes like the pro that she is. When asked whether she was a big Madonna fan, Annette Roque Lauer paused to think for a second, before replying, 'Umm, yeah,' before adding, 'Let's just put it this way: I'm a supporter of anyone who supports UNICEF' (a portion of the money raised from the evenings book sales went to the charity)."

Good, diplomatic answer, Mrs. Lauer. We entirely agree.


(image via NYPost)

Out: Jeff Zucker. Let the Jeff Zucker Deathwatch (TM) begin. NBC has problems, and not just Today Show problems. And although Liz Smith tells us that Jeff Zucker is being honored tonight at Phoenix House by the likes of Matt and Katie and Conan and Jonathan Tisch, his job is in danger. In a MediaLifeMagazine poll of media planner and buyers, most believe he has until Christmas before his ass gets canned. According to MediaLifeMagazine:

"'Jeff Zucker needs to go,' said one respondent.

�?'Ever since he took over, NBC has become a slow boiling frog. It all started when he arrogantly canceled Providence. He seems to be untouchable. But unless NBC wants to keep making up stats where they look somewhat respectable, he should be packing his bags. Where's Jamie Tarses?'

"Wonders another: 'What could possibly be their motivation for keeping Thursdays intact? It seems to me Jeff Zucker should get used to being number 4 ... because NBC will be in that rank for a long time to come!'

"How much longer does Zucker, who has headed NBC since 2000, have to turn things around?"

Enquiring minds want to know.

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