Saturday, January 07, 2006

David Cronenberg Burns Crash


(image via double-whammy)

When we think of Director David Cronenberg -- and he occasionally crawls, spiderlike, into our Mind Palace -- the words: intense, Canadian, sexually perverse and thoroughly transgressive -- not necessarily in that order, come to mind. ... He's got "issues" ... (A considerable pause) a freak, to be sure; but he's our freak.

The helmer of such unyielding classics as Videodrome, History of Violence, Existenz and the upcoming -- and, unfortunately entitled -- "I, Kill" is not all too happy that Paul Haggis named his movie after Cronenberg's own project, Crash. Someones ass, needless to say, will be kicked at Graydon Carter's Vanity Fair Oscar bash.(Averted Gaze) Our money is on the cat who directed Friday the Thirteenth. (Exaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachment)

We can, of course, see how hardcore car crash sex-fetishists might be a tad goddam-fucking-pissed to tweak some effervescent crank ("Beam Me Up, Scotty!"), hoist an adult beverage ("Crack!"), and pop into into their home entertainment systems ... a placid DVD on racial sterotypes ("What-the-fuck?").

Car crash sex-fetishists are old school like that.

According to Mass Appeal Magazine:

Mass Appeal: "What did you think of this bullshit-ass movie that just stole the title of Crash?

David Cronenberg: "That did upset me. I thought it was really disrespectful, not just to me, but to JG Vallard who wrote the book. It's interesting, in France, where my movie is much revered, they refuse to call that other movie Crash. They renamed it Collision and I like that."

In his next outing, expect Cronenberg to auteur a little dungeon-fantasy about rival directors who steak your films name and get all the critical buzz. Any resemblence to Haggis will be purely coincidental.


jerebo said...

Too bad Cronenberg's Crash was even more pretentious than Haggis'. I miss the days of Videodrome!

Paula Dixon said...

Just wait till you see what JG Ballard does when you spell his name wrong!