A Little of the Old In and Out

In: Prince William and the Noblesse Oblige. The Corsair rather likes Wills. Try as we might like to "bonfire his vanity" -- as that is what we do here -- Prince William appears entirely immune to our muckracking, and is all but scandal-free.

Moreover, he has a natural charitable impulse, so alien to the Windsor's, he likes to "give back to the community." What, what? Noblesse oblige ... used here without irony?!

Apparently so, according to Hello!Magazine:



"Clutching a packet of loo paper, Prince William showed that he was very much a hands-on royal as he and his brother Harry helped process relief supplies destined for the tsunami-ravaged Maldives at a Red Cross depot on Friday.

"Having helped pack the supplies into boxes, the St Andrews student also got to test a skill he?s probably had little cause to call upon in the past ? that of palette-shunting. The Queen's elder grandson was snapped maneuvering palettes piled high with sealed cartons of relief material in and out of the Bristol warehouse."

Out: Elvis ... was a hero to most but ... he sure had a lot of shit backed up in his colon, whooey, Elvis, what is up with the funk?!! (sotto voce: we thought you were "a little bit country")According to those wonderful Page Sixxies, who report on the ubiquitous Baird Jones of Webster Hall's Elvis arcana:

"Colon hydrotherapist Millan Chessman claims Elvis died from constipation because his colon was stuffed with 32 pounds of impacted fecal matter caused by addiction to prescription drugs and peanut butter and bacon sandwiches."

Eeeeeeew (The Corsair elegantly dry-heaves, his nimble legs doing a sort of rhumba, cha-cha rhythm, circa 1957, swaying in the breeze); but it gets worse, "New York magazine food critic Gael Greene once told Brill's Content she went to interview Presley for UPI early in her career and ended up in bed with him: 'He was young and beautiful, and I was young and madly in love with him . . . what I remember most distinctly is that as I was leaving his hotel room, he picked up the phone and ordered a fried-egg sandwich.'"

Eeeeew; but it gets worse, Gael Greene, in a 1999 NY Mag interview with Illyrian Gangster-NY Mag Theater critic, John Simon, admitted to being a "companion" of porn "star" Jamie Gillis (eew):

"Gael Greene: Oh, that I let go. La Colombe d'Or is in my memory because you were on a date. A beat With a married woman ...

"John Simon: And you were there with a porn star, right?

"G.G.: I was there with my porn star.

"J.S.: What was his name? Jamie something?

"G.G.: Gillis. He was a wonderful companion. It turned out you had insulted him in some review. Though I don't know how you happened to be reviewing porn films.

"J.S.: Just lucky, I guess. The porn star was a nice fellow."

Eeeeeew. Let's just say (The Corsair, still dry-heaving, elegantly, is now bobbing back-and-forth to a mid-1920s Charleston rhythm; and he has mysteriously gained access to a vintage "flapper" hat, which he flourished with great industry), Gael Greene is a food critic, whose "appetites" transcend the kitchen, and luxuriate wanly in the Master Bedroom.

In: LVMH. As Suzy Menkes reports for the International Herald Tribune:

"An executive at LVMH confirmed, on condition of anonymity, that a deal was in progress to sell Lacroix, the only brand Mr. Arnault himself started from scratch, to the Falic Group, a $620 million beauty and duty-free company based in the United States. The Falic Group bought two of LVMH's niche cosmetics brands, Hard Candy and Urban Decay, in 2003.

"The LVMH executive said that the agreement-in-progress could not be made public under French law, which requires that a company's unions first vote on any change in ownership.

"The preliminary meeting took place on Wednesday, and the financial terms will depend on whether the designer Christian Lacroix agrees to work with the prospective owners."

We will gloss over the obvious jokes that could be made at the -- tee hee -- Falic Group. Menkes mentions the divide between the sales and marketers and the creative types. Should Lacroix decide to come on board -- we believe he will, but cannot say at present -- Falic Group (tee hee) will follow the highly successful "classes to the masses" business model. Anf then things get interesting.

Finally, according to Fashionweekdaily, who also reported that LVMH formally announced it had acquired Glenmourangie liquor, "a source close to LVMH told The Daily that most of the transaction had been agreed upon several weeks before Christmas. This may explain a rather somber and highly private dinner in a Paris restaurant with Mr. Lacroix and a coiffed doyenne of international fashion journalism in November."

Out: Club Paris. Is "Club Paris" a location ... or ... (The Corsair furrows and arches his brows in rapid succession while twirling an imaginary cigar a la Groucho) is it a command? (clubs Paris Hilton violently, figuratively) Not hott, and neither is Joey Fatone, who receives especially vicious "pimpslappage" at the hands of FashionWiredaily:

"Last week, Paris Hilton was a no-show (well, six hours late) for the opening of her first nightclub, Club Paris, located in Orlando, Fla.

"Sister Nicky took Paris' place at the pink-ribbon-cutting ceremony with hundreds of disappointed local officials, leading Orlando businessmen and guests watching.

"Most guests left after being told that the jet-setting heiress was stuck in a Swiss airport. 'We have free drinks inside,' co-owner Fred Khalilian told the crowd.

"'This kind of stuff happens ? you miss a flight,' former 'NSync singer Joey Fatone, one of the few celebs there, told the impatient press. Did we mention he shows up for the opening of an envelope?"

ouch!

In: German's Need Jesus. Of Claire Berlinsky's New York Times Arts and Leisure article on the rise of "Fasco-rock" band Rammstein, we worry; we really worry:

"'We love Rammstein because they make it so hard, so dark, so evil, and that makes it so interesting for us,' said another woman in her late 30's."

Uhh, yeah (The Corsair lights up a Cuban Schimmelpennick). Yeah (puffs smoke). You know, apropos of nothing (matter-of-factly), maybe Germany needs Jesus. Not that The Corsair himself is a believer, but, you know, certain people -- dare we say, certain nations, even -- have certain needs. Like Jesus. To displace, hmm -- how does one say this? -- "spider-like pessimistic nihilisms" permeate intellectual inquiry that threaten world order?

Leo Strauss, the much maligned and least understood of political philosophers, was very wise on the subject of religion, recognizing it's importance, it's particular order in the West. Strauss witnessed first hand German nihilism.


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