A Little of the Old In and Out

In: Britney's Smelly Feet. After that post on Kissinger, we are feeling rather adolescent in mood. So, let's harsh on Britney's stinky feet, girfriend! That's what you get trampling with feet unshorn in public restrooms. According to TheSun:

"BRITNEY SPEARS needs to toe the line on hygiene � the pop princess appears to have a nasty rash spreading up her ankle.

"But to be fair to Brit, she is making more of an effort with her appearance these days, as her new video shows."

Out: Madonna. Sooner or later, Madonna had to turn into the equivalent of a Warren Beatty or a Barbra Streisand with the soft lighting and elaborate conditions for photo shoots. The veneer of spiritualism erodes and the underliying Material Girl emerges, like a palimsest. Vanity ages badly, all that "disgusting voodoo" notwithstanding. According to PopBitch:

"Madonna was among the stars at BBC television centre this week recording a song for the Tsunami Appeal show on US TV.

"A BBC technician tells us that Madonna is now using a 'Faye'. This is a bright light placed at eye level, in front of the performer, which helps to hide wrinkles. It gets its name in honour of Faye Dunaway, who always insists on one."

In: William F. Buckley, Jr. The rich get richer to the tune of $65,000, over a 35-year old feud. According to Lloyd Grove:

"Yesterday, 79-year-old Buckley was crowing over Esquire magazine's abjectly apologetic 'Open Letter' in the February issue, saying the mag 'greatly regrets' including an old Vidal polemic, 'A Distasteful Encounter With William F. Buckley Jr.,' in a recent anthology.

"When the Vidal essay was originally printed in 1969 - after the two debaters exchanged televised insults during the raucous 1968 Democratic convention - Buckley successfully sued the magazine for libel. Among other libels, Vidal had suggested Buckley was an anti-Semite in the mag.

"This time, Esquire's parent company, Hearst, agreed to pay Buckley and his lawyers $65,000, destroy all unshipped copies of the 2003 collection, 'Esquire's Big Book of Great Writing,' and provide to anyone who requests it Buckley's 1969 essay giving his version of the 1968 dustup.

"'Present management was not aware of the history of this litigation,' the letter states.

"'I must say they were rather good about it,' Buckley told me. 'It's amazing that they hadn't heard of that controversy. It's 35 years old, but if anybody's going to handle an 8,000-word essay by Vidal, you'd think it would brush up against the fingers of some lawyer.'

"Buckley added mischievously: 'Why don't you call Vidal and ask him if he'll be more careful from now on.'

"The 79-year-old Vidal didn't respond yesterday."

Out: Evander Holyfield. After so many shots to the noggin, one gets a little (Averted Gaze)punch drunk. A retired heavyweight boxer is kind of like you're crazy uncle whom everybody gets uncomfortable talking about. But even that's no excuse for this report from The Corsair's favorite husband and wife crimefighting gossip duo, Rush and Molly (last item):

"Evander Holyfield may be good with his fists, but someone should untie his tongue. 'American Idol' star Ruben Studdard, 'The West Wing's' Dul� Hill, soul legend Roberta Flack and Destiny's Child's Michelle Williams were among those who watched in disbelief last weekend when the boxer attempted to read from a TelePrompTer at the Stellar Awards in Houston. A source says he mistook 'leave' for 'live' and fumbled over numerous other common words."

In: Michael Musto. The Corsair doesn't even remember when he started reading Musto, but after all these years, we are still a rabid fan. La Dolce Musto just kind of entered into our weekly rituals and remained. We even loved the impromptu style of his Jim McGreevy piece. The Corsair is a Musto whore, and, to that effect, his Oscar predictions are a feast for snarky eyes:

"Best Actor: JAMIE FOXX for Ray (his old In Living Color co-star Jim Carrey will be thrilled, I'm sure)"

Did you see that look of raw envy-rage that Jim Carrey shot to the camera, unintentionally, at the Golden Globes when Foxx beat him out? Priceless ... The German's should coin a compund word to to fully express that emotion Carrey was giving out:

"Best Actress: KATE WINSLET, Eternal Sunshine (by now Jim Carrey is killing himself).

"Best Actress: NATALIE PORTMAN, Closer (cut snatch scene equals added Oscar nom);"

Out: Bob Shrum. Paleoliberal and Kerry for President general Bob Shrum is leaving politics, according to the salmon colored weekly:

"Mr. Shrum, 61, is retiring from the political-consulting business altogether. He will move from the Washington area to an apartment in Chelsea and will teach at New York University.

"(His move is) just the latest evidence of turmoil among Washington�s Democratic consultants, even as New York looks to the capital�s highly professionalized political culture as a model for local campaigns. Slowly disappearing is the colorful old model of mysterious gurus (David Garth) and tough-talking street guys (Hank Sheinkopf). Taking their place are younger, cleaner-cut professionals with similar political views but vastly different strategies and tactics.

"My view is that the Democrats almost won the election, and we probably underestimated the difficulty of winning in times of war," he said. "Fifty-five thousand votes in Ohio and you have a Democratic President."

In: Fat Actress. We like the early buzz on Kirstie Alley's new show, as that significant cultural artifact, Star Magazine reports:

"Convinced she will never have sex again because no man would want her, Alley is reminded by her assistants that black men whistle when she walks by! What does she do? She goes looking for love at a soul-food restaurant!"

"A sneak peek at an episode of Kirstie Alley's upcoming pseudo-reality show, Fat Actress, reveals an intriguing sex scene involving Alley, Hangin' with Mr. Cooper star Mark Curry and a fudgesicle. According to a Star People spy who saw an advance copy of the much awaited Showtime series, Kirstie complains about how long it's been since she's been intimate -- really intimate -- with a man. To fill her needs, the 203- pound actress intentionally targets someone who might appreciate her ample posterior -- ultimately luring comedic actor Curry to her bed. Once in the bedroom, Alley, in oversize lingerie, moans as she devours a fudgesicle while Curry spanks her and calls her 'bootylicious.'"

In: The New York Magazine Sundance Photoshoot. Is it already time for Sundance? According to Boldface Names:

"Thirty Sundance-bound directors got together for a class picture for New York magazine yesterday, and synergy being what it is, we were asked if we would like to stop by.

"It was darned inspiring to see all those blue-jeaned, besweatered artists cheek by jowl - newcomers like DAVID REDMON with the actor/director KEVIN BACON with the publicist/director DAN KLORES with veterans like the director/producer/writer WILLIAM GREAVES. Phrases like 'lands that were stolen from them' and 'my parents' divorce' and 'complex relationship' filled the air."

Hmm. How many Bush voters do you think were in the room?