Rambling Thoughts

(Ed Note: This post has no teleological end or internal logos, read at your own risk, it is a ramble. No blogs tomorrow. Veterans Day. The Corsair needs to spend time with his special lady)

Back when I was an early teen Rollerdisco was the big thing. Actually, it was a big thing for kids from the mid 70s through the early 80s. My experience with rollerdance was back in the early 80s, at the tailend of the trend, and, for some reason, the big place was called "Laces," and it was in Long Island, so we needed someone's mom to drive us. Cool was measured by how well you skated, which entailed being able to do disco dance moves -- i.e, ass shaking -- while you skated and looked nonchalant. Afterwards you would have earache for 24 hours because the sound system was so extreme.

Although I never got one, the coolest guys all had studs in their left ear ("Left is right, right is wrong"). The studs were cubic zirconia or some faux stone -- I remember that the guy who pierced ears had a box full of them, I think he charged $4, I don't remember. For a guy with an earring in his left ear that could dance while he skated, the world was his oyster. He was the man. But the cool thing for guys back then was to get phone numbers. The digits. And then, to show them off to your friends at the end of the evening. The guy with the most numbers was considered the biggest dude. There was a bigger thrill gained in showing off the numbers than in actually using them. Such were the mating rituals of the early 80s preteen.

The girls all dressed like that teen prostitute who tried to trick out Tootie (a roller disco icon, by the way, all hail Kim Fields) into "the life" that "very special episode (Runaway, guest starring always tragic feather-haired Tammy Lauren)" of the Facts of Life. Remember that episode? That was probably the second best "Very Special Episode" of all time, because nothing can beat the Diffrn't Strokes Very Special episode. Nothing. Hands down the scariest (and funniest) moment of my childhood is when Dudley (so expertly played by Shavar Ross) . emerges from some back room, shirtless, giving the immortal line, "He tried to - he tried to touch me. "

I don't know why I find televised descriptions of the brutal loss of innocence so hugely amusing. Does that make me a bad person? Probably.

Anyway, back to The Facts of Life Very Special Episode. Tootie Ramsey runs away from the Eastland school for girls, trying to show everyone what a woman she was, and, in the process, gets her coat and wallet stolen and winds up stranded and broke in some greasy New York diner in Midtown during the corrupt Ed Koch era. I think Tootie ran away because she was considered too young to go to a Broadway show.

A web site describes the episode thusly, "Determined to prove her maturity, Tootie goes off to New York City unescorted to meet with friends at a theater. A teenage prostitute teaches her a harsh reality." Too true, young Tootie was plied with hot cocoa and big city dreams by the feather haired hooker while, unbeknownst to her, the most stereotypical pimp ever captured on the tv skulks in the shadows checking out her prospects in "the Life". My mother really didn't like this episode, she thought it was too "mature," which kind of made me like it even more.

The end was sad because although Mrs. Edna Garrett (so ably played by coppertop Charlotte Rae -- thank you, thank you) saved Tootie from a life on the streets, the other little girl had to stay and no one called the cops or anything. So Tootie went off to her posh school and the girl to her tricks. Sad.