Nic Cage and Wife Number 3



What are the odds that Nic Cage (who incidentally, is filming a Ghost Rider movie, how cool is that?) will remain married to his third wife, former sushi waitress, a sizzling hott number named Alice, beyond Christmas? The Corsair is definitely feeling the red dress thingie she's got going on. The Corsair will give you 50-50 odds, true believer, that they will last. Let's just run down his batting average in nups, shall we:

Wifey Numer One: Patricia Arquette. Total Hollywood marriage (Averted Gaze). Agents may have been involved, backend profits might have been divvied up by short fingered studio bosses, The Corsair won't hazard a guess. Surely a recipe for the freaky. A strange match to be sure, albeit beneficial for both careers -- a double positive. He had some indie cred -- before he squandered it, whoring his man-ass out in 8MM -- and she was the up and coming indie starlet, heiress to the Arquette name -- before she whored out her own ass is Stigmata. Perfect match, whore meets whore. In fact, the only time these two were ever really lovey dovey was after Nic won an Oscar for Leaving Las Vegas.

The Sequel: His lifelong obsession with Elvis comes to fruition like some ... terrible flower ... as this eccentric actor actually marries Lisa Marie Pressley, the daughter of his idol. The Corsair does not know what he was thinking about here, but the sex must have had all sorts of dark gleaming dimensions as Nic had to be thinking about her Daddy and ... oh dear *The Corsair shudders under waves of nausea* ... let's not probe that avenue any longer. Some depths are better left undiscovered.

Wife Number 3: According to Hello!magazine:


"Nicholas Cage's new wife Alice looked every inch the Hollywood starlet when she took to the red carpet with her husband on Monday. The 20-year-old, who was working as a waitress until she met the actor, was arm-in-arm with her leading man at the premiere of National Treasure in Los Angeles.

"Alice's life hasn't been the same since she met Nic at the sushi bar she was working in last year. She got a taste of the Hollywood lifestyle immediately after their wedding, when he whisked her away to the Big Apple for an extravagant spending spree. And the Oscar winner continued to lavish gifts on the Korean-American beauty two months later when filming on his latest movie brought him to London. According to newspaper reports, the 40-year-old spent ($148,512) on designer clothes and accessories for his new bride during the three-day visit."

Love is that which can only be expressed through shopping sprees.

"Nic and Alice made their vows in a small private ceremony in California last July. It was the actor's third trip down the aisle: he had previously been married to Elvis Presley's daughter Lisa Marie and his Bringing Out The Dead co-star Patricia Arquette. The performer's loved ones seem to think his latest relationship will stand the test of time, though. 'They're a good fit,' says older brother Marc. 'Definitely. I think this will last.'"

You've got to fucking be kidding me, Marc.