Will Artie Lang Quit the Stern Show?



Update: Lang Quits Stern (April 10, 2008) HERE


According to the shadowy network of The Howard Stern Bulletin Board (also known as the "murky subconscious of the suburban Long Island contractor"), Artie Lang, may quit to take the role of a counterman at a pizzeria on a network midseason replacement. This, quite frankly, is a role that Artie has (air quotes) "researched" all his life; Lang appears to be the very embodiment of the purveyor of (Averted Gaze) "Italian Ice," and (exaggerated cough, feigned detatchment) "slices." Will they pay him in (concealed contempt) "Sicilians"? Listener "CrookedTree" starts the avelanche:

"just got off the phone from a friend of mine. artie quit the show to start filming a mid-season replacement show for NBC"

And, crookedtree's comment was confirmed by Stern Show regular Sal the Stockbroker, several hours later, with some keen detective work:

"Sadly, it's true. I just called Rev Bob (Levy's) house, his wife picked up and said he left for LA to do a TV show with that fat guy from the radio show. I said Benjy? She said whose Benjy? So I guess it was Artie.

"It is true and you have to remember that in Arties contract he has an agreement that he can leave at anytime for a sitcom. From what I'm hearing It's a great show and Artie is very excited. I can't say much except that it does take place in a pizzeria and artie plays a counter man. I just spoke to Norm McDonald and he said he's happy for him too. I hope the Rev is brushing up on his acting skills.

"Well, Artie is going there to shoot the first 3 episodes. His dad in the show (get this) is Chuck Low! Chuck played Maury from Good Fellas. I love that guy.Sounds like a great show. As for now it looks like Greg Fitzsimmons will be sitting in next week."

"The great thing about this show is that alot of show regulars will do guest spots. Craig Gass will be on as someone with bipolar celebrity disorder. Should be pretty good.From what I hear the Rev is playing an abrasive drunk who sits at the back of the pizza shop and harasses the customers. Sam Simon has been working on this since he hooked up with the guys in Vegas. Looks like a winner!"

Does this development signal the possibility of a return -- with a pay cut, of course -- of Jackie 'The Joke Man' Martling? Martling was last seen in some terrible straight to DVD High Times movie and watching Law and Order all day from his lonely Long Island house.

The possible loss of Lange signals another blow to the shock jock, the second this year after the defection of Stuttering John Melendez in March, after spending twelve years on the show, John also bypassed Stern for the tonier climes of network television, namely The Tonight Show with Jay Leno.

This couldn't have come at a worse time as The Stern Show is facing a major challenge in the form of former Infinity Network coworkers, Opie and Anthony, who will broadcast uncensored Stern-like material directly opposite Stern on XM Satellite Radio beginning Oct. 4.

Also, the beleaguered Stern has battled the FCC all year over fines stemming from what he believes to be politically motivated

Stern has less than two years on his contract.

Is the end near?

To be continued.