The Jack Daniels Swing Voter?



A Note to either the Bush or Kerry Camp:

Page Six of the Post writes today:

"JACK Daniel's has sparked outrage among serious drinkers by unceremoniously lowering the proof of its famous Tennessee Whiskey from 86 to 80. The change which means the hooch has 3 percent less alcohol has riled those still smarting from the 'betrayal' of 15 years ago when the company lowered the strength of its 90-proof, 138-year-old original recipe, to 86 proof."

Security Moms? (The Corsair softly chuckles at the naivete of the question) So last week, my blogger mellow, try again. Nascar Dads? (Averted Gaze) Pure drivel. Never underestimate the importance of (The Corsair's eyes sparkle) "Jack Daniels" to the electorate, those merry shitfaced few, that band of brothers, those who proudly give Jim Beam drinkers the stinkface. Jack is Americana, and in an election year, as a precursor to the debates, someone ought to make it an issue and take advantage of this opportunity.

Jack Daniels is suffused with a certain raw American mystique. Any Presidential candidate would love to borrow some of that amber glory when campaigning through the heartland. Vast swaths of the American electorate actually make pilgrimages to the distillery in Lynchburg, Tennessee, ogling the enormous vats of bubbling mash and the towering charcoal-filtration tanks, to make company with Gentleman Jack. Jack Daniels is a cult, an iconic brand, and -- mirabile dictu -- it just happens to be smack dab center in very valuable electoral real estate, Lynyrd Skynrd land that Bush would like to keep, and Kerry might want to steal.

Granted, the President may have a harder time making this woody scented outback adult beverage an issue useful to his campaign, as he is now a tea totaler, a Christian man, but as he is the good ole boy of the campaign, his words would probably have greater effect on the private company's decision process, quite possibly, making Jack Daniels rethink their plan to lower the proof.

Senator Kerry would have an uphill battle as well. He doesn't look like the type who would have a shot of Jack. Bush does. Kerry strikes me as a single malt kind of guy. Hell, Bush prolly ordered it by the bottle at some country and western joint back in the day, then proceeded to play Hank Williams and Patsy Kline on the jukebox.

But how cool would an appeal for Jack Daniels to leave it's proofing status quo ante be at the debates at the University of Miami? The students would immediately appreciate it, and, surely, so will bars across the country -- from dives in working class West Virginia, Knoxville and Kentucky to the East Village and Embassy Row in DC -- bars where the debates will almost certainly be playing on the tube and watched with great attention.

Will one of you guys jocularly mention that you think the distillery should keep the proof as is is, say, "Doris Kearns Goodwin mentions Lyndon Johnson" (wonkette's line)?

Just a thought, this humble appeal to the Jack Daniels voter.