Catherine Zeta Jones Kidnap Scare: Worst Week Ever.



Correction: Guys This appears to be a hoax. I regret the error. Grrr. The Sun reporters Sara Nathan and her cohort Thomas Whitaker suck big time. And this post is so well written. I was going to put it in my Bet of Corsair ... alas.

Sultry actress Catherine Zeta Jones has had the worst week ever, hands down, and The Corsair is more than a little bit concerned about her well being, and whether or not an (air quotes) "Mariah Carey Moment" might ensue. The Corsair humbly advises Catherine Zeta-Jones to take a year off to smooth out at her cottage colony in Bermuda.

I'm making this point because of the harrowing incident that occurred just last night to Catherine Zeta-Jones that is just getting reported in today's media. In an incident remiscent of the opening scene of her film Traffic, where corruption and crime in Mexico is depicted as terrifyingly rampant and virtually uncontrollable by localized police, last night Catherine Zeta Jones barely escaped a brutal kidnapping, as her limousine was ambushed by what the British press are calling "bandits."

According to The Sun:

"SHAKEN screen beauty Catherine Zeta Jones was recovering last night after Mexican bandits tried to kidnap her.

"The gang ? said by police to have been 'armed to the teeth' ? ambushed her limousine as she returned from filming on her new movie.

"Mum-of-two Catherine, 34, who is in Mexico to shoot Legend Of Zorro, cowered in fear as the gunmen tried to force the limo off the road.

"She was saved as bodyguards in another vehicle rammed the bandits? car."

Mexico, perhaps the kidnapping capitol of the world, is probably not the best place in the world to drive a "chauffeured limo" with "blacked out windows" en route to a "rented villa." You get my drift? The $100 million plus Mexican kidnap industry has grown increasingly violent, and, as the Independent notes, " ... drawing on a range of conspirators including policemen, bank clerks, domestic servants and security guards at residential blocks across the capital, these gangs work up a detailed profile of their victims that enables them to choose a window of opportunity for the kidnap and set a realistic ransom."

Further, The Independent declares:

"Since the beginning of 1996, Mexican kidnappers have shot, stabbed and strangled over 160 of their hostages, with more than half of the fatalities occurring during a surge of criminal activity in the past three years. In one recent case that sickened crime-weary Mexicans, two young brothers were shot dead and their bodies tossed in a skip even after their parents paid a $600,000 (�335,000) ransom.

"Another case in July involved the kidnap and murder of Mexico's 1997 Woman of the Year, Carmen Gutierrez. A highly regarded specialist in rehabilitative medicine, Gutierrez was snatched as she left her smart apartment complex. Her abductors became jittery during negotiations, strangled her and tossed her body in a sewage canal on the city's outskirts. Then, noticing that she was still alive, they held her head under the water until she stopped breathing."

Fuck. As you can see, a chauffeured limo presents way too juicy a target. More from the UK Independent's frightening article entitled "Mexico City: The Kidnap Capitol of the World":

"In a recent report, international risk consultants Kroll Inc estimated that some 3,000 people were victims of kidnapping in Mexico last year - around 20 times the number actually reported to the country's notoriously corrupt police force - placing the fast-modernizing nation of 100 million people second only to strife-torn Colombia in the global kidnapping league."

Now back to The Sun, on Catherine's narrow escape:

"In the confusion Catherine?s driver seized the opportunity to put his foot down and whisk her out of harm?s way.

"The would-be kidnappers roared off with security staff hired by film bosses in hot pursuit.
Cops joined the chase in San Luis Potosi, four hours north of Mexico City. They managed to catch the gang.

"Last night a senior Mexican cop confirmed: 'Four people have been arrested. The gang was armed to the teeth.'

"A film source said last night: 'Catherine has been left really shaken up by this. She has only been on set for a few days. She was very emotional afterwards and had to be calmed down.'?

Zeta Jones has every right to be emotional. As if it isn't bad enough that she just escaped being kidnapped by cats who don't hesitate to send body parts along with kidnap notes to stress their seriousness, there's new info on the first African-American stalker, Dawnette Knight stalking case, as The Scotsman reports today:

"A Los Angeles court was told death threats phoned in to a hotel where Catherine Zeta-Jones was staying were linked to the woman accused of stalking the Oscar-winning actress.

"Detective Rodney Wagner told a preliminary hearing that phone bills showed calls to the hotel were made by Dawnette Knight, 33, who is charged with one count of stalking and 24 counts of making criminal threats.In two of the calls, made on May 18 and 19, the caller told a receptionist: 'We know she is in the hotel. We are going to kill her. She does not (expletive) around with Michael Douglas.', Wagner said.The detective said that in a third call, on May 21, the caller threatened to 'blow Catherine?s head off on Sunday in Monte Carlo.'"

And, further, according to the Daily Mail:

"Dawnette Knight, the woman accused of stalking and threatening to kill actress Catherine Zeta-Jones was so obsessed with her that she sent Jones letters threatening to kill her and 'feed her to the dogs.'

"According to The Daily Mail, Knight was also found to have a book autographed by Zeta-Jones and her husband Michael Douglas.

"A letter written to Douglas, calling him the 'sexiest man alive' was also recovered."

In July Michael Douglas told a courtroom his wife Catherine Zeta-Jones "showed all the signs of having a nervous breakdown."

Catherine, The Corsair speaking, get out of your film contract and take a year off in Bermuda with your hubby. You can afford it and when la fortuna turns black -- as it quite obviously has done in your case, honey -- it's best to just ride it out, especially if you have the means.