Governor Warren Beatty?



(image via splicedonline)

Will candidate Warren Beatty, like "Bullworth" before him, deliver his campaign speeches in free verse? And, more important, will the general suckiosity of that infernal "Town & Country" be held against Warren Beatty, political candidate?

The logstanding member in good stead of "The Malibu Mafia" (Rxaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachment) may be gearing up for a campaign against The Ahnold. Dish, to be sure, never sleeps: and so, neither do those intrepid Page Sixxies, who supply us with the following tasty and nutritious morsel, "(We hear) THAT fugitive felon Roman Polanski is urging old friend Warren Beatty to run for governor of California in hopes of a pardon for his 1977 statutory rape conviction. Then Polanski will finally be able to return to the U.S."

His pimpish ways, we wager, will move the homeboy vote profoundly in Oakland and Compton; but what's this we hear about a "testicle lift"? (Exaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachment)

But we digress. Roman Polanski is not the impish child molester to suggest this idea. Increasingly, Beatty -- who has, of late, fallen behind in the informal "Hollywood legacy" competition with Robert Redford -- has been taking public shots at Arnold. Nasty public shots. On Thursday, for example, Beatty stood before the California Nurses Association (We know, we know -- in the minds eye we picture Beatty horizontal at such an affair), and accused Schwarzenegger of governing "by show, by spin, by cosmetics and photos ops.''

Oh no he didn't! Schwarzenegger spokeswoman Margita Thompson responded to the AP (link via Chicago Sun Times), "We don't care that much about Warren Beatty, and based on his ticket sales from the past generation, I doubt anyone else does either.''

Tune in to what will be the most exciting political race -- in our guestimation -- of 2006.