Monday, April 05, 2004

Topic A: Ron Galotti in Vermont


Above: Russell Simmons and Ron Galotti "act like they know." They don't.

Last night former Vogue publisher Ron Galotti (no relation) made a visit to our favorite media tv show (alright, Howie, our second favorite) to tell us about "dropping out" of the competetive New York city magazine game.

Apparently "Mr. Big" will be raising chickens (I'm not kidding) and hanging out on 100 acres in the Green Mountain State.

"I lived for 35 years in a pressure cooker," Ron told Tina. So, I guess Ron can understand the vagaries of the politics of poultry; the restraints of rotisserie. "I left my house at 7 am," lamented the former publisher of Country Living, "and I didn't get back until 11 pm."

"Ron," said Tina, with all the sincerity of a talk show host wanting to move on to the next segment, "we're going to check in with you ... because I really want to know blow-by-blow how life is going for you on the farm." Hugs and kisses ended the segment.

Hmmm. The Corsair's devilish mind wonders how that will end up:

slow fade

cock crows, Morning Summer 2004:

Tina Brown: Hello folks, and live on satellite, we are checking in on former publisher of Conde Nast Traveler Ron Galotti for the blow by blow on his 100 acre Vermont farm. How's it going, Ron.

Ron Galotti: Last night I saw stars, Tina.

Tina: (excitedly) stars? Who, Ron, give us the dish.

Ron: No Tina, not who. You gotta think of the big picture here. Like, you got Cameron Diaz? We've got the Aurora Borealis.
It shines brighter, Tina, last night was the harvest moon ...

Tina: (dejectedly) That sounds positively bucolic. -- Okay, Ron, gotta run to the next segment.

fade in.

cock crows Fall 2004

Tina: And live on remote, we have Ron Galotti, former publishing director at Esquire. Tell us what's new, Ron?

Ron: That's Selectman Galotti, Tina.

Tina: Excuse me?

Ron: I was elected by my town to the board of selectmen. Real direct democracy, Tina. Better than making a cool million a year as publisher at Vanity Fair.

Tina: (unenthusiastically) ... and just what exactly does that entail, Ron?

Ron: (zestily) Oh, we oversees roads -- including the laying out, discontinuing and reclassifying of roads. We board sit as local board of health, liquor control commission and I'm on the sewer commission ...

Tina: Where has the time flown? We have to move onto the next segment.

fade in

cock crows. Winter 2004

Tina: (positively unexcited) And live via satellite, we have Selectman Galotti. Quickly give us your hot picks.

Ron: Funny you should say picked, Tina, cause I "picked" these myself. Pressed Cider, Tina; they can't get enough of it here. I pick the apples, run them up the road to a cider mill and ...

Tina: Okay, Ron, we've run out of time.