Saturday, July 10, 2004

A Little of the Old In and Out

In: Monday's New York Magazine piece -- we cannot wait. It's on like Gray Poupon! Gawker takes a sneak peak at a chestnut from Monday's pyrotechnic display also known as New York Magazine's article on the Gossip Wars. And Fashionweekdaily's Daily Spy chimes in:

"New York magazine closed their much-buzzed-about gossip story on Thursday amid a furor of speculation and rumor. Writers Vanessa Grigoriadis and Jacob Bernstein expanded the piece from its initial focus on the dust-up between former Page Six-er Ian Spiegelman and scandalmonger Doug Dechert to comprise an acidic look at the New York gossip machine in general, and seemed intent on dredging up any controversy they could along the way. Spiegelman, Dechert, 'Bad Girl' author Abigail Vona, Lloyd Grove, and Richard Johnson were all photographed for the story, leading some to speculate that it could end up on the cover. There is also buzz that young Bernstein?s byline may not make the cut. Only at New York, kids, only at New York."

Out: All of a sudden ... the whole (The Corsair makes ironic quotation marks with his fingers out of thin air) "America Watches Courtney Love's slow and protracted Nervous Breakdown" routine isn't as ... fun as it was in the Spring. Actually, in point of fact the way it's playing itself out is kind of creeping me out. Things took a David Lynchian turn somewhere and we want to jump the fuck off this ride. Seriously. Courtney is scaring us; and we don't mean the way Lenny Kravitz explains that she ran around her old apartment hallways naked either. The Post reports, "A weeping and cursing Courtney Love was rushed from her SoHo apartment to a hospital wearing a camisole and handcuffs yesterday on her 40th birthday, after telling cops she had an abortion." Whoa! Back that up. Way too much information. Way Waaay too much. I am a media junky, but we are officially -- as of right here right now -- staying away from Court Love.

In: Ultragrrrl put this up on her site and I've been laughing about it for about an hour now, which either says I'm working too hard, or The Ultra is a comedy genius. I'm seriously considering converting to Judaism so that we can get married and issue stunning little mocha-colored kids with sophisticated blogs.

Out: Billionaire Dallas Mavericks owner, Mark Cuban, tells us, "'How could (I) let Steve Nash go?' It?s a question I?m going to hear for a long time. It?s a question Mavs fans deserve an answer to. As best I can, I will try to go through all the logical, illogical, emotional and financial scenarios that we explored in putting together the offer that we thought would keep Steve a Dallas Maverick for the rest of his career." If you like long-winded, rambling basketball stories told by self indulgent and mildly eccentric billionaires, then hot-damn, you might want to go here and forever lose an hour slice of your summer.

In: Marlon Brando's secret tapes. You just know that pretty soon, they will be out, according to that significant cultural artifact The National Enquirer:

"'Marlon secretly tape-recorded his phone calls -- he was the consummate control freak," divulged best-selling author Peter Manso, who wrote the definitive book on the actor's life, 'Brando: The Biography.'

"Marlon Brando secretly taped phone conversations -- and now some of the biggest names in Hollywood are terrified their darkest secrets will be exposed, The ENQUIRER has learned exclusively.
The rotund actor loved nothing more than phoning friends and dishing dirt for hours about the showbiz elite -- and even persuaded Marilyn Monroe to disclose her secrets about the Kennedys, say sources.

"The Hollywood legend spilled gay and straight sex secrets of stars, reveled in details of cheating and sordid affairs, got actors to disclose their mistresses -- and even spoke freely about his own bisexual lifestyle ... all on tape."

I'll give 20-1 odds that it will be all over the web by Thanksgiving. By the way, which one of Brano's multitudes of children will get the Tahitian Atoll, and can islands be inherited?

Out: It looks like this may be the end of Tony Blair:

"British Prime Minister Tony Blair considered resigning last month and had to be persuaded to stay on by senior colleagues, the BBC reported Saturday.

"Blair's office made no comment on the report, saying he had repeatedly insisted when asked about his future that he would lead his ruling Labor party into a third general election expected next year, which analysts predict he would win.

"Blair, who has seen his ratings tumble in opinion polls since last year's war in Iraq (news - web sites), had been 'seriously considering his position' following a series of attacks on his leadership, the broadcaster said in an unsourced report.

"Three cabinet colleagues, Health Secretary John Reid, Culture Secretary Tessa Jowell and Education Secretary Charles Clarke met Blair, urged him not to quit and sought to assure him he had wide government support, it said.

"'I'm not going to speculate on what I see as Westminster gossip,' Jowell told BBC radio Saturday. 'Tony Blair is our prime minister -- the most successful prime minister of modern times. He will continue to lead our government.'"

The Pakistan Daily Times shares some acute observations on the political atmosphere at 10 Downing Street:

"Britain�s Tony Blair looks like taking a fresh hit over Iraq next week on the eve of two closely watched by-elections � events that will help shape the political landscape for an expected 2005 general election.

"Within four days, an inquiry will report on intelligence failings over Iraq�s weaponry, Blair�s government will unveil its public spending plans for the next 3 years and voters could humiliate his Labour Party at the polls.

"With the prime minister�s popularity battered by Iraq, such a combination would have prompted fears of a Labour mutiny two months ago. But parliamentarians and analysts say Blair is on firmer ground now and the timing of events � coming just before parliament breaks for summer � will spare him any long-term damage, whatever the week�s outcome.

"'I don�t sense any conspiracy right now,' said one Labour parliamentarian (MP). 'They won�t be thinking of plotting. They�ll be thinking of their buckets and spades.' Wyn Grant, professor of politics at Warwick University agreed that Blair has survived the worst, 'It�s not plain sailing, but he�s coming into calmer waters.'"

Or, as The Corsair predicts, a deep sea storm.

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