Naomi In Ibiza



Would you take a bitch-slap from this woman? (image via celebrity-gossip)

Granted, Naomi Campbell could probably cold-cock us with a stiffly delivered right-cross. *Ka-Pow!* But as we fell into unconsciousness, crashing on the floor in slo-mo amongst the shattered bits and pieces of her rhinstone-studded PDA, it would be the best. Lo ultimo. Because that's "Naomi Love" right there, yo. It would be the best because we would be one of the few -- the precious few -- who had known the wrath that follows the passionate love that is, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, Naomi Fucking Campbell. And she is as beautiful as she is physically dangerous and that's o-kay. Consenting adults.

We imagine that when Naomi Campbell knocks you out, there is probably a pre-concussive soundtrack going on in the theater of the skull consisting of Bach's Mass in B-Minor. And the accoustics of The Corsair's mind-palace are gloriously complex. One is probably, in the quiet of ther Soul, recounting all the explosive supermodel sex that preceded the beating. What's a little punchiness between lovers? So what if she's a Tyson while out on the town, so long as she's a Sorceress between the sheets!

We are absolutely fascinated with how this woman could be so beautiful and so physically dangerous all wrapped up in a delicious, chocolate package of yum.

And, yes, she's crazy. Nutty as an Almond Joy. But we dig crazy girls. The Crazy Girls are limitless in the boudoir, you see. Limited only by the imagination. They are -- How does one put it? -- the spice of life (The Corsair kisses his index finger and thumb a la a chef after a culinary triumph), mwah!

More beautiful and crazy Naomi (call me?) in Ibiza (August 11,2008)"