Quien es Mas Negro?

Quien es mas macho? That's so over. We want to know which whigro is more black! Quien es mas negro, silver dollar. The blacker the berry the sweeter the Jesus Juice, nah mean. Theoretically, if we let our combatants loose on 125th street, which one would bring back the hydro, and which one would bring back oregano. And the categories of our little crunked up game are:

Directorial alter ego:

Ingmar Bergman had Max Von Sydow, Fellini had Marchello Mastroianni -- you get the jist. Which specimen of black manliness does our little whigro idealize himself as?

Celebrity Urban Pals:

Significant others. Peeps.

Street Cred:

Nothing says wigger like the accoutrements of a thuggernaut. Ghetto fabulosity is priceless.

Afro-Asiatic Connects:

The revolution will not be televised. When the Afro-Asiatic connect happens, you better recognize. When the black muslims with the funny outfits hook up with the martial artists and the Asian tiger economies, we're gonna find out once and for all whose world is this. Now, what have the combatants done to further this cause?

And our contestants this week are two fine specimens of "the whigro," Quentin Tarantino, and Brett Ratner, who "grew up in Miami Beach, the only child of a famous Jewish socialite," according to IMDb. Let's get ready to rumble:

Directorial alter ego:

Quentin, I mean QT, has Sam Jackson

Brett Ratner, the Rat, has Chris Tucker ... no contest.

Winner: QT

Pals:

QT has Pam Grier

The Rat has Russell Simmons and his new girl Serena Williams. Not to mention the rumored Naomi Campbell fling.

Winner: The Rat. We love us our Pam Grier, but we don't thing she hangs with QT once the cameras are off and the paycheck has been signed. Rat directed hip hop videos, for gods sake, how black is that?

Street Cred:

QT once posed for Bikini Magazine with a 22 ouncer of malt liquor.

The Rat is fucking Serena Williams. Enough said.

Winner: No contest, hands down, The Rat. Now, if QT had been shown pouring out some of his urban concoction for "the dead Homies," that would be a serious mitigating factor. And it would have to be a 40 ouncer. 22's are for pussies, QT, come on, act like you know. Bish.

Afro-Asiatic Connects:

QT has Kill Bill, which has Vernita Green, who dies rather quick for our tastes, frankly.

The Rat has The Rush Hour franchise, speeding up the day when the African and the Asian will clasp hands in a deadly kung fu grip thus putting the kibosh on The New World Order ... or at least that's what my friend Pookie from Uptown says.

Quien es mas Negro?

Brett Ratner. He's old school like that.