Some Oscar Thoughts

Here are 5 brief Oscar thoughts that The Corsair would like to let marinate in the blogosphere:



Above: The Corsair really wants to "do" the one in the white (Image via miamifilmfestival)

5) Waifish documentarian Zana Briski is wicked hott. And, to make things sexier, she's all "human-rightsy" and stuff, like Samantha Power. We'd love to -- how does one say this elegantly, and in a humanitarian, P.C. way -- "tap that ass." Really give her a robust rodgering. Just putting that out there.

4) The beatific image of Dustin Hoffman that the Oscar cameras kept panning to was, we are informed by Defamer, the visage of a gruesome winehead. Thanks, Defamer, like, alot: and we thought he was high on life. But no. The "grape"!

3) The camera pans to a laughing Kirsten Dunst, who famously didn't get along with no longer cool Toby McGuire during the filming of Spiderman -- acting, people! -- after Chris Rock poo pooed his star powers, saying:

"If you can't get a star, wait. Just wait. There's only four real stars. The rest are just popular people. Clint Eastwood is a star. Toby McGuire is just a boy in tights.''

1) Gwyneth Paltrow's constipated gasface after Chris Rock makes the requisite breast feeding of Apple joke. Priceless.

1) We liked Beyonce's song, okay, maybe we are the only one in the blogosphere that did. This morning, Howard Stern mentioned that his girlfriend, swimsuit model Beth Ostrowsky, is "fluent in french," and, eo ipso (Okay, Howard didn't say "eo ipso," we just added that to be fancy) Stern was annoyed that Beyonce Knowles sang the first song of the evening in French.

While we are sure Beth O can give a mean "French," (and probably take an okay "Dutch," and, we imagine, accept "The Greek Way") that doesn't particularly qualify her as a Francophile. Just a cunninglinguist.

PS) The Yo Yo Ma. Loved the Yo Yo Ma and the Bach sarabande. All memorials should be festooned with Bach sarabandes.