Snoop Dogg's Smoking ... Gun

The rape accusations against Snoop Doggy Dogg oh so richly illustrate one of the myriad of reasons why civilized people don't regale in being universally regarded as a "king pimp." (Averted Gaze) And what not-izzle. The smoke today emanating from the barrel of theSmokingGun pointed at Snoop might be an indica-sativa hybrid -- pfft! -- as his accuser's file goes online. According to TheSmokingGun:



"JANE DOE charges that Snoop (real name: Calvin Broadus) and several associates raped her in the entertainer's dressing room following a January 2003 taping of ABC's 'Jimmy Kimmel Live.' JANE DOE, who won a 2002 Emmy for her work on HBO's 'Six Feet Under,' claims that she was left incapacitated after drinking what a Snoop associate told her was champagne."

That associate, John Doe #1, is described as "an African-American male, approximately 35 years of age, with red hair and green eyes ... and freckles." (A considerable pause) Now, granted -- and I want to be delicate here, as there is nothing funny about allegations of rape ... but ... What the fuck?! What. The. Fu-huck?! A black man with red hair, green eyes and ... freckles? Offering me champagne?

Our horrible suspicions that something is terribly awry would, quite frankly begin with the freckles. Would you slurp anything proferred up by a black man with red hair and freckles?! Say what?! We rest our case.

"According to the complaint, after JANE DOE, 36, was drugged, she was sexually assaulted by Broadus and four cronies. In addition to the rapper, JANE DOE, who is seeking $25 million in combined damages, has named ABC, Kimmel's show, and the Walt Disney Company as defendants.

"She alleges that the network is partly liable for the attacks because, during the week Broadus co-hosted the Kimmel program, his dressing room was stocked with 'large quantities' of champagne and marijuana (DOE also claims to have seen Broadus 'snorting cocaine powder' on the final night of his Kimmel gig, which came during the show's first week on ABC). ... Four months later, according to the complaint, DOE contacted the Kimmel program 'and told them that she had been sexually assaulted at the show' and was contacting the police. In short order, DOE claims, she began having her living expenses paid through an ABC investment subsidiary. After those network payouts ceased, Broadus began paying DOE's expenses while the rapper's lawyers opened negotiations with the woman's attorneys."

More here.