In: Michael Musto. And so, there we were, reading Liz Smith, when this leaps off the page:
"MICHAEL MUSTO, who is no longer merely the mouth that roars dish at the Village Voice, is now a part of the musical 'Newsical.' Once a month, Musto will provide the 'Newsical' producers with a 'hot scoop' that will then be put to music, as the 'Michael Musto Song.' The satiric revue has an open-ended run (Michael wouldn't have it any other way) and plays at Studio 54 ."
We are so there.
Out: Dan Rather, Stifle Thyself. The Corsair only has one thing to say to all of you people. Syracuse, 413. According to The Observer:
"CBS sources said that Mr. Rather has been officially muzzled: On March 9, when he steps down as anchor of the CBS Evening News, he will be limited to seven controlled interviews with the press to avoid questions about the scandal."
Will the muzzle have the CBS eye logo?
In: Warren Beatty, Porn Afficionado. The husband of the likely Best Actress Oscar winner, the priapic Warren Beatty knows his "fluffers" from his "reverse cowgirl." According to that significant cultural artifact, The National Enquirer:
"Ex-porn actress Sharon Mitchell, who now heads a group that monitors X-rated movie stars for sexual diseases, was introduced to Beatty on the set of his film 'Town & Country.' She told The ENQUIRER: 'I was struck by how extensive his knowledge was of the porn industry.'"
Why ... are we not surprised?
Out: Queen Elizabeth. Royal marriage for love? How quaint. But not necessarily socially acceptable, especially considering it's a second marriage on both sides, love be damned. And just when we were starting to feel good about the royals. According to Hello!Magazine:
"Prince Charles' parents won't be there to share the moment when he ties the knot with fianc�e Camilla Parker Bowles in April. The Queen and Prince Philip have confirmed reports they are not to attend the ceremony in Windsor's Town Hall, though Buckingham Palace insists their decision should not be interpreted as a snub.'The Queen's prime concern is that the civil ceremony should be as low-key as possible, in line with the couple's wishes,' explained a spokeswoman. 'Clearly, if she were to attend, the occasion would no longer be low-key. She is attending the service of dedication and paying for the reception - this is not a snub.'"
Not a snub, but so very fucking close. Asymptotically close. Always approaching, never quite reaching ...
In: David Hasselhoff. The Corsair is not sure what happened to the rap career that former pimp Ice T was promoting a while back, but Scarlett Johansson sure likes em big and square jawed, according to Contactmusic (link via Ananova):
"She said: 'I so fancied him when I was young, that to see my name on the credits next to his makes me go all girly. He was a hunk back in those days.'"
Yeah ... a hunk of cheese, Scarlett.
Out: Jennifer Love Hewett. "Love," as her close friends call her, is starring in a new pilot (link via Defamer). According to Hollywood Reporter:
"'Party of Five' alumna Jennifer Love Hewitt will play a psychic in CBS' untitled drama pilot centered on the work of James Van Praagh.
"Widely known as 'Ghost Whisperer,' the project revolves around a young newlywed (Hewitt) who communicates with the dead."
So not there.
In: Hypocricy. Have you ever noticed that the gasbags who go out of their way to defend Larry Summers are the same people who argue that Ward Churchill should be fired? The Corsair has no such hypocrisy issues: both Summers and Churchill are dicks who should keep their day jobs. James Wolcott makes an interesting point, though:
"Digby is also correct about the dumb-cluck level of the show's discussion of the Larry Summers Harvard controversy, with most of the panelists falling over themselves to disassociate themselves from 'PC.' Andrew Sullivan tried to make it sound as if Summers Agonistes is a pivotal Galileo moment in the fight over free inquiry ..."