Reason #734 Why Britney Needs To Put On Shoes



(image via ohnotheydidnt)

We'd like to start this post by asking in earnest that Britney Spears put down that steaming plate of Possum and listen.

Dear Britney:

There are hundreds of reasons as to why you should put aside your natural, semi-savagish tendency of walking around barefoot in public. For one, the acrid stench. (Averted Gaze)

And now, this:

"Britney Spears had to be rushed to hospital after treading on a hypodermic needle.

"The pop babe - who is on holiday in Hawaii - had stepped out of her car without shoes on when she trod on the needle in a parking lot.The panic-stricken star was taken to Hawaii State Hospital, but tests showed the needle was unused.

"A source is quoted in Britain's Daily Star newspaper as saying: 'Britney is going to be fine. She's got a nasty cut but it's been disinfected and dressed and she's been released from hospital.
'It was more the shock of seeing the needle poking out of her foot - as you can imagine. All sorts of things race through your mind in that situation. The conclusion we would all jump to is that it was discarded by a drug user."

You're a Mommy now, Britney. Be responsible. Stop being feral. Time to lose that "nurtured in the wilderness" vibe and join human civilization.

Thank you.