Friday, July 30, 2004

Christian Slater, Unmasked!

Who can blame that fabled celebrity connoisseur of ecdysiasts, Christian Slater, for wearing a mask when he dropped in for a spot of Ale at his favorite London strip club, Stringfellows. Sometimes you wanna go where everybody knows your name.

That Christian Slater wears a mask is significant, psychologically revealing, really; as actors tend to have a nebulous sense of self -- who else would choose a vocation involving constant protean change, oftentimes three or more serious character studies a year, all this and to live in a land, namely: Tinseltown, filled to the brim with plastic personas who have "people" who will call your "people" about "doing lunch"? (The Corsair does an airkiss, followed by an averted gaze, exaggerated cough, and feigned detatchment)

A mask is also useful because, well, Slater's wife has a penchant for kicking his ass when she gets upset when the red-blooded actor strays from his marriage vow. But his choice of masks is almost Freudian. According to the 3AM Girls:

"Just hours before our spies caught him canoodling with a mystery blonde in London's Nobu, the Hollywood hunk was kicked out of his favourite lap-dancing club, Stringfellows, for refusing to take off his ... mask.

"Bizarrely, we're told the 34-year-old True Romance star was disguised as, ahem, dead US president Richard Nixon."

"A club source tells us: 'Christian has been to Stringfellows many times and has always been one of our favourite customers.

"'He's not keen on being photographed going in or out but he has never resorted to fancy dress before.'"

The Corsair sips casually from his icy pimp goblet, displaying a three quarter profile, shadowed in such a way as to suggest intrigue, by the venetian blinds across the room.

"When the actor, who's currently in rehearsals for a stage production of One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest, pitched up wearing the rubber mask last Saturday, he was quizzed by puzzled doormen.

"'He told them he'd been in a few days before and had been spotted when he left.

"'He managed to convince staff that it was him so, as he's such a good customer, they let him in.' But Christian's 'eccentric' behaviour continued inside ..."

Did Slater inadvertently channel the corrupt ex-President, thus drawing bad "ju-ju"?

"'It all got a bit strange because he continued to wear the mask,' says our mole.

"'It was a bit disconcerting for the girls to be dancing for someone who looked like a weirdo. So one of the promoters politely asked him to remove the mask.' But father-of-two Christian was adamant that it was staying on.

"He just wouldn't take it off, so the decision was taken to ask him to leave.

"'Christian was pretty good about it - he didn't kick up a fuss and left straight away - and still the mask remained on.'

" ... Stringfellow's flamboyant owner Peter Stringfellow yesterday confirmed to us: 'Yes, Christian was asked to leave the club because he wouldn't take off his Nixon mask.'"

Why do we think that tonight Stringfellows will be filled to the brim with men wearing Nixon masks looking for lapdances?

Comment here or on VH1's Best Week Ever Blog

1 comment:

Drew said...

Maybe he wears the mask because he was in a bad car wreck with Cameron Diaz and is obsessed with Penelope Cruz.

When I comment at 3 in the morning, you get Vanilla Sky references, I make no apologies.