Kurt Anderson Slams Pseudo Composer John Williams


"'Welcome to AT & T Services. The cellular customer you have called is unavailable, or has travelled outside the coverage area.' George (Mactier) specifically hates this passive-aggressive record-o-man. The prissy, vague excuse -- 'unavailable?' -- always strikes him as a prevarication meant to keep him from speaking to (his wife), or his collegues, or other cellular customers. Nothing like AOL's digital butler, with his fake-enthusiastic utopian-zombie voice. George continues to find 'You've Got Mail!' entertaining enough, even ten thousand repetitions later, so that he didn't finally deactivate it until around the time the movie came out and he read that the AOL man, whose first name was Elwood, has his own web site.

'US West!' a female electronic tone says over the opening chords to the overture from John Williams's new US West Symphony, 'Directory assistance ... for which community in the 6-5-1 area code?

"'St.Paul,' George says.

"'Which customer listing?' the robot operatr asks.

"Edith Hope Mactier.'

"' ... one moment,' the robot operator reples.

"John Williams's Fanfare for the New Economy, the same four chords once again. (italics mine)"

Kurt Anderson, Turn of the Century

So, what are you saying, Kurt? John Williams is not the American Bach?