Marky Mark's Funky Punch
According to Lloyd Grove's Lowdown, former funky bunch leader Mark Wahlberg tells Details that didn't like his role in Jonathan Demme's The Truth About Charlie, saying, "Mother-- got me running around with a scarf and a baguette."
"Pain couture," via Gaultier? We're thinking Sourdough tighty whities with suggestively pointy conic -- er -- "organ." Of course, the true "Southie" would insist that his "drawers" be composed of Irish Soda Bread. Now that (The Corsair snaps) would be all the rage (The Corsair sips a naive Drouchin Chablis) at the pret a porter (Averted Gaze).
The critical assessment, however, agrees entirely with his appraisal of the fucking stinky "Truth About Charlie." (Exaggerated cough exquisitely suggesting feigned detachment) Splicedonline (link via the aptly titled "Rottentomatoes.com") opined, "Joshua Peters, played by Mark Wahlberg, who may look classy in a '60s-homage porkpie hat, but as a character he's dry, dry, dry."
No word on whether the baguette was moist, moist, moist. What with all the "dadhats" and the "breaded panties," the conversation rambles, under a Dadaist momentum, onto his badboy reputation, Grove observes:
"The 33-year-old former Calvin Klein underwear model and teenage thug (who was convicted of assault after beating up two Vietnamese immigrants in Beantown 17 years ago) tells Details mag that Hollywood just can't get that tough-childhood thing right.
"He confides: 'I can't remember the last time I punched somebody for no reason. ... The last, I don't know, 50 fights I was in, there was a reason.'"
We can imagine. Thems mean streets for a rapper/underwear model briskly strolling the sinister precincts of the 'hood clad only in a scarf and baguette undergarments, no?