Why is Naomi So Mad at P Diddy?



(image via mdr)

They're wealthy, they're black, they have -- dare we say it? -- anger management issues; still: Why can't Naomi and P Diddy just be friends? according to those intrepid Page Sixxies:

"EMBATTLED supermodel Naomi Campbell is feuding with her old pal, Sean 'Puffy' Combs. The two - who until recently would travel the world together and party till dawn - are not talking after Campbell unexpectedly pulled out of the new NBC show Combs is producing, 'Cooking Showdown,' which pairs celebrities with superchefs. 'Naomi found out Puff was the producer and dropped out,' said our spy. Combs, who will have to do with just Ja Rule on his show, is mystified as to why she's so mad at him."

Allow us to hazard a guess. (The Corsair gathers his forces) You see, Combs *allegedly* cracked Record label Exec Steven Stoute over the noggin with a bottle of champagne. Damned cheek! And right on his cabbage, besides. (The Corsair pours himself a bottle of aged champagne) To someone of Naomi Campbell's calibre, that's de rigeur. Ghetto even.

One doesn't crack the hired help in the cabbage with the fizzy stuff. One uses a Blackberry (Why do you think they call them "Crackberry"?), or, say, another somesuch PDA. And one utilizes them with great gusto. (Exaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachment) They are made of sterner stuff and, besides, the spilling champagne can only be properly construed as alcohol abuse. (Averted Gaze)A social class-A felony, to be sure.

Finally, Champagne bottles as disciplinary headcrackers are so, well, 20th century.