Corsair-Bronques Smacktalk, Take 37



Hello, "Assy."

This blog has been vaguely fascinated by that Brooklyn phenomenon "Merlin Bronques" for some time now. He is like our goddam nemesis. Every blogger worth his salt needs a colorful nemesis with which to focus one's hate. And so, "Merlin Bronques," feather-headed hipster, mark this: We are at Blog War. Bring your Drama, freakshow; we can do this ...

Further, we do not like his chin. It peeves us; it rankles.

Bless his soul, but Bronques is about as deep as a thimble. Photography suits him since it is all about surfaces. If we ever met Bronques, it would probably be phenomenally Awkward, considering our history of Corsair-Bronques smacktalk.

Still, the obsession continues; we'd like to think that if we did happen to be at the same party, all would be amiable. We'd have a drink. Chuckle. And then, of course, The Corsair would turn on Bronques online, dissecting the conversation and vivisecting Bronques.

Cause The Corsair is Old School like that.

Here's a snippet of Bronques-speak from the US Magazine Young Hollywood Party on Lastnightsparty might explain why his blessed shallowness is so intriguing:

"Whitney: I play Whitney on The Hills. I play myself.

"Bronques: Do you have a boyfriend on the show?

"Whitney: I don't. I'm not very interesting.

"Bronques: Are you a bitch character or a nice character?

"Whitney: I'd say I'm a nice character.

"Bronques: That IS really boring!

"Whitney: I'm sorry!! (laughing) I guess they chose me as the person who listens to everybody's problems.

"Bronques: My friend Lydia from New York and I think the dialogue on The Hills is vapid."

As opposed to "Bronques dialogue (Averted Gaze)," multitudinous in its irony and liberal in its use of the word "bitch."

But ... you do your thing, Bronques ... you ... do .. your ... thing.