Gene Simmons to Sell Soul ... One Share at a Time

Legendary capitalist-musician Gene Simmons is planning to sell his soul one share at a time. "That son of a gun is clever," said Satan with an admiring smile. "God gave rock and roll to you, but Gene is a gift from yours truly." Since Simmons has sold virtually everything else to his band of gullible and financially solvent fans, the selling of his soul via over the counter penny stocks should come as no surprise. Simmons in the past has sold a very bad magazine called Tongue, as well as a KISS coffin, which, he at one point suggested would make an excellent beer cooler. Charmed, I'm sure. Insiders are predicting that Gene Simmons market capitalization for shares of his soul could fetch $7.25.

BTW: This piece is definitely satire in case you are wondering.