"... Because Mariah Needed Guidance"



Above: Classic Deer-in-the-Headlights Mariah, image via ananova

No truer words have been uttered in the English language than, "... because Mariah needed guidance." (Sotto voce) So true. Even the hoi polloi know it. Those strands of truth come to us from the hale and hearty Page Sixxies, forsooth:

"MARIAH Carey, who is regularly mocked for her got-it-flaunt-it fashion sense, is getting a style makeover from her new best friend � Vogue editor-at-large Andre Leon Talley.

"Talley escorted Carey to Karl Lagerfeld's dinner at Matsuri last week ..."

No doubt, Karl has the sauteed Mare, a --yum, yum -- "Belgian treat," to be sure (Averted Gaze).



Question: Karl, the ponytail, the horse-flesh diet, the coltish manner ... Aren't you going a little too far with the whole cheval motif?
Answer: Neeeyyyyyyy... (image via stern)

"... took her to Oprah Winfrey's celebration of African-American legends over the weekend near Santa Barbara, and hung out with the songbird yesterday in L.A.

"According to Carey's rep and pal Marvet Britto: 'I introduced them two months ago because Mariah needed guidance."

A long considerable pause. Nods head in affirmation.

"'She has an incredible sense of style � but then she went out in outfits like cutoff shorts and tank tops. It was her old team of people telling her to wear that."

So ... no more "poom-poom" shorts?