A Little of the Old In and Out
In: Jennifer Garner. As Medialife reports, " 'Alias' star Jennifer Garner has made the switch from playing a spy on television to recruiting spies for the CIA. Garner will be featured in a video on the agency�s employment web site. The CIA chose her to represent its organization because, as stated on the CIA web site, the character she plays embodies the integrity, patriotism and intelligence the CIA searches for when recruiting." Now, Garner may be a slice o' heavenly yellow cake and all, but what's her game? You'll remember that Garner also hosted the Scientific and Technical Awards on Feb. 14 at the Ritz Carlton Huntington Hotel in Pasadena. Is she angling to leverage the geek stalker material position currently left vacant by Gillian Anderson. Or maybe it is an elaborate plot to get her own Star Trek show.
Out: Ron Galotti. I've fucked with Galotti majorly in my little media blog, but I'm sad to see him go. Keith Kelly reports, "Ron Galotti, the real-life 'Mr. Big' who was played by actor Chris Noth in 'Sex and the City,' is selling everything and leaving Gotham.
"'I bought the farm,' he told Media Ink. His new home will be a 100-acre farm in Pomfret, Vt., just outside of Woodstock.
"The departure of one of the most important publishers in the business over two decades comes six months after his stormy departure - the third in his career- from glitzy, glamorous Conde Nast, where he was most recently publisher of GQ.
"The 55-year-old former executive says he looks back fondly but has no intention to return. 'I've had a great run, I wouldn't change a thing,' he said." Oh Ron, now who will we bitchslap when it's a slow week?
In: Anderson Cooper is in, very, very in. Ben Affleck, whose career is in a serious nose dive, was quoted giving a nasty remark to the always excellent Rush and Molloy. "Asked why (Affleck) went on the Howard Stern show in December, Affleck quips: 'With Howard, you know what you're getting. It's not CNN, where there's some snide p- named Anderson Cooper pretending to do real news."
Cooper this week also earned high praise from Our fearless Leader, Choire Sicha, class president of the blogger set, in the salmon colored pages of The Observer, saying, among other things, "At a time when cable news is a cesspool of partisan shit-stirring, rehashed war feed and cheery, white-toothed weatherman smiles, Mr. Cooper distinctly stands out. He�s turning out to be something even more unexpected�and much more compelling�than the Gen-X sex symbol/anchor of his do-me CNN marketing: the return of the TV journalist as humanist." You go, Anderson.
Out: OneWorld Magazine. That glossy tribute to Russ' ego is capt. No more loving interviews and cover features on the boss' wife, the absurd Kimora Simmons. According to Rush and Molloy, "(Russell) Simmons ... had some bad news on the publishing front. His OneWorld magazine has folded. The nine-year-old mag about hip-hop culture was said to be having serious financial problems. Simmons blamed the shutdown on the departure of publisher John Pasmore, adding that 'we plan to relaunch OneWorld in the near future.'" No, please don't Russell.
In: Emptyhanded.com via Two-Twenty.net via TMFTML. James Allenspach is an evil genius. Jesus on the cross, listening to --? I'd guess Norah Jones, cause Jesus had that "in touch with his feminine side" flow about him.
Out: The Practice. Apparently, this will be news to all seven people who still watch this show, but Nellie Andreeva of The Hollywood Reporter reports that the show is done. "David E. Kelley's Emmy-winning legal drama 'The Practice' will bow out May 16 after eight seasons.
"The final episodes of the ABC show will set up a spinoff series, which has been given a 22-episode order by the network for the fall." I don't think I have ever watched a single episode of this show.
In: The Colorado Senate race will be the most closely watched and competetive in, perhaps, the nation's history. As Peter Savodnik writes in The Hill, "Rep. Bob Beauprez (R-Colo.) is in the middle of a classic political dilemma: The White House is urging him to run for the seat held by Sen. Ben Nighthorse Campbell (R-Colo.) while House Republican leaders are pressing him to hold on to the seat he narrowly won in 2002."
Actually, Beauprez "spent more than $1.8 million to eke out a 121-vote victory." In other words, if he runs for the Senate, the Democrats will pick it up faster than Colin Farrell at a Playboy Mansion party. And the Senate race is just as hot in this battleground for power in the capitol of the world's last standing superpower. Rumored to be thinking of a run is philosopher king Gary Hart. State Attorney General Ken Salazar and software entrepreneur Rutt Bridges, who is expected to spend $10 million on the race, have all already announced their candidacies. Rep. Mark Udall (D-Colo.)pulled out, and, on the Republican side, rising star Tom Tancredo, who has made a name for himself in Republican power circles by an intense anti-immigration platform (he's to the right of Pat Buchanan if such a space exists).
Out: Jude Law, neatfreak. According to that significant cultural artifact Star Magazine, Jude Law is a neatfreak. They write, "Jude Law is telling friends he's so frustrated with his girlfriend, Alfie co-star Sienna Miller, 21, he wants to break up. The reason? Seems Jude has a lot in common with Felix Ungar from The Odd Couple -- obsessed with order and cleanliness. A source says the 31-year-old can't stand the fact that Sienna is so completely disorganized. 'Jude lines up the shoes in his wardrobe, arranges his clothes according to color. He keeps all the papers on his desk neatly stacked and his pencils sharpened. He also freaks out if there's anything in the fridge that's beyond the sell-by date.'
"Apparently, Jude was just as anal-retentive with his ex-wife, Sadie Frost, 35, and their three children. 'He was annoyed if the kids left finger marks on the walls, or if the living room was strewn with toys," the source says. "Sadie was always trying to get the house as clean as possible for him, but Jude was complaining to her that it looked untidy.'
"According to the source, Sienna is ultra flighty. 'She loses her cell phone, forgets appointments, and constantly spills the contents of her purse.' Friends say that Jude can't believe he's dating someone more scatterbrained than Sadie, so he wants out -- with plans to dump Sienna right after the Oscars, according to the source."
Wait, didn't Sienna pose for Maxim in her panties? And Jude thought he was dating a Mesopotamian scholar?
In: Sexy camera phone pics. Once again, Drew Barrymore is ahead of the curve. Ananova reports, "The Charlie's Angels star was seen taking the saucy snaps in lingerie store, Victoria's Secret, reports Teen Hollywood.
"The actress was apparently sending the sexy pictures to her rock star boyfriend, Fabrizio Moretti of The Strokes.
"A friend of the actress is quoted as saying: 'The camera phone was a birthday gift and she was bursting to try it out.
"'She and a girlfriend were snapping away in Victoria's Secret and were sending the raunchy photos to Fabrizio to see which outfit took his fancy.'"
Thursday, March 11, 2004
It's Only Hollywood, Baby
"Alan Pakula once told me one of the truest stories I have ever heard about film journalists."
" When Sophie's Choice was coming out, one of the news magazines sent a writer to do a major feature on me. He came to my office to do the interview, and, during it, he told me about a script he had written. He just happened to have it with him and he gave it to me.
"Three days later, he called me and asked me if I had a chance to read his script yet. He told me that he was in the middle of writing his profile about me.
"I knew what he was doing: he was shaking me down. While he was in the middle of writing this profile of me which would be read by millions of people, he was asking me what I thought of his script.
""I told him that I'd been very busy, but hoped to read his script that weekend -- which I knew was past his deadline for submitting my profile.
"'Oh,' he said, sounding disappointed, 'I was hoping you'd have it read before then.'
"I thought about it. A favorable profile in a magazine with that kind of mega-circulation would certainly help the movie. I was worried about Sophie's box office anyway. The subject matter itself would scare some people off.
"I called him back and told him that I'd finished reading his script and loved it. I told him that I wanted to produce it -- not direct it, but produce it like I had produced other movies earlier in my career.
"'Oh,' he said, sounding disappointed, 'I was hoping you would direct it."
"I called him back the next morning and told him I thought about it some more. I told him I liked the script so much I wanted to direct it. As my next movie.
"There was a pause and he said 'I hear you're an honorable man. Do I have your word on that?'
"'Absolutely, ' I said to him, 'I give you my word. You've written a brilliant script.'
";Thank you,' he said, 'this is probably the greatest moment of my life. By the way, I think you are going to like the profile I am writing."
"We made plans to get together in a week -- way past his deadline -- to celebrate.
"When the profile came out, it was long, glowing, and flattering and I'm sure it helped the movie's success."
"He called me after the article came out and he kept calling me for days, but I wouldn't take his calls."
"He sent me an anonymous note in the mail, but I have no doubt it came from him.
"All it said was 'You fucked me masterfully. I applaud you. I deserved it.'"
Joe Eszterhas, Hollywood Animal, p.117-18
"Alan Pakula once told me one of the truest stories I have ever heard about film journalists."
" When Sophie's Choice was coming out, one of the news magazines sent a writer to do a major feature on me. He came to my office to do the interview, and, during it, he told me about a script he had written. He just happened to have it with him and he gave it to me.
"Three days later, he called me and asked me if I had a chance to read his script yet. He told me that he was in the middle of writing his profile about me.
"I knew what he was doing: he was shaking me down. While he was in the middle of writing this profile of me which would be read by millions of people, he was asking me what I thought of his script.
""I told him that I'd been very busy, but hoped to read his script that weekend -- which I knew was past his deadline for submitting my profile.
"'Oh,' he said, sounding disappointed, 'I was hoping you'd have it read before then.'
"I thought about it. A favorable profile in a magazine with that kind of mega-circulation would certainly help the movie. I was worried about Sophie's box office anyway. The subject matter itself would scare some people off.
"I called him back and told him that I'd finished reading his script and loved it. I told him that I wanted to produce it -- not direct it, but produce it like I had produced other movies earlier in my career.
"'Oh,' he said, sounding disappointed, 'I was hoping you would direct it."
"I called him back the next morning and told him I thought about it some more. I told him I liked the script so much I wanted to direct it. As my next movie.
"There was a pause and he said 'I hear you're an honorable man. Do I have your word on that?'
"'Absolutely, ' I said to him, 'I give you my word. You've written a brilliant script.'
";Thank you,' he said, 'this is probably the greatest moment of my life. By the way, I think you are going to like the profile I am writing."
"We made plans to get together in a week -- way past his deadline -- to celebrate.
"When the profile came out, it was long, glowing, and flattering and I'm sure it helped the movie's success."
"He called me after the article came out and he kept calling me for days, but I wouldn't take his calls."
"He sent me an anonymous note in the mail, but I have no doubt it came from him.
"All it said was 'You fucked me masterfully. I applaud you. I deserved it.'"
Joe Eszterhas, Hollywood Animal, p.117-18
Our Man Chalabi
After the devastating 60 Minutes piece deconstructed Chalabi, the pile on begins in DC. And no, Chalabi was not the white guy on The White Shadow (now that you mention it, TV Land should do a retro, no?). Ahmed Chalabi, according to Fred Kaplan of Slate, is an egomaniac. And worse. He writes, "What is going on with Ahmad Chalabi? The Iraqi exile, MIT-trained mathematician, and wealthy businessman who plotted with high-level U.S. officials to return to Baghdad and grab the reins in a post-Saddam government�to bring to his homeland the virtues of modernization and Western-style democracy�has now joined forces with Iraq's most prominent anti-American theocrats."
The conservatives also have misgivings about Chalabi. According to Arnaud de Borchgrave of the Washington Times:
"(Chalabi) controlled and supervised the appointment of no fewer than six key players, including three ministers � the oil minister, the finance minister, the trade minister, the central bank governor, the head of the trade bank and the managing director of Iraq's largest commercial bank.
"With this kind of power base, Mr. Chalabi's next steps were predictably familiar. They are deja vu ad nauseam in other parts of the developing world. He has placed relatives and cronies in key slots in the new bureaucracy. Promissory contracts totaling some $400 million for Iraqi reconstruction projects have been allocated to Middle Eastern and American business friends.
"On June 30, when chief U.S. Administrator L. Paul Bremer and his colleagues on the coalition's provisional authority go out of business, and Mr. Chalabi and his fellow Governing Council members recover full sovereignty on Iraq's behalf (pending elections in 2005), the long-time president of the Iraqi National Congress (INC) in exile, will be in the financial driver's seat."
Way to go, Neocons.
After the devastating 60 Minutes piece deconstructed Chalabi, the pile on begins in DC. And no, Chalabi was not the white guy on The White Shadow (now that you mention it, TV Land should do a retro, no?). Ahmed Chalabi, according to Fred Kaplan of Slate, is an egomaniac. And worse. He writes, "What is going on with Ahmad Chalabi? The Iraqi exile, MIT-trained mathematician, and wealthy businessman who plotted with high-level U.S. officials to return to Baghdad and grab the reins in a post-Saddam government�to bring to his homeland the virtues of modernization and Western-style democracy�has now joined forces with Iraq's most prominent anti-American theocrats."
The conservatives also have misgivings about Chalabi. According to Arnaud de Borchgrave of the Washington Times:
"(Chalabi) controlled and supervised the appointment of no fewer than six key players, including three ministers � the oil minister, the finance minister, the trade minister, the central bank governor, the head of the trade bank and the managing director of Iraq's largest commercial bank.
"With this kind of power base, Mr. Chalabi's next steps were predictably familiar. They are deja vu ad nauseam in other parts of the developing world. He has placed relatives and cronies in key slots in the new bureaucracy. Promissory contracts totaling some $400 million for Iraqi reconstruction projects have been allocated to Middle Eastern and American business friends.
"On June 30, when chief U.S. Administrator L. Paul Bremer and his colleagues on the coalition's provisional authority go out of business, and Mr. Chalabi and his fellow Governing Council members recover full sovereignty on Iraq's behalf (pending elections in 2005), the long-time president of the Iraqi National Congress (INC) in exile, will be in the financial driver's seat."
Way to go, Neocons.
Tuesday, March 09, 2004
Bad Day/ Good Day
Today was a hard day for African-American men. Terrorist freak John Allen Muhammed was given the death penalty. Jayson Blair did interviews in the media, spreading the manure. Not a good day all around for black men. Then again both Romenesko and Wonkette gave me linky-poo's on their high trafficked and super-influential sites for my Left Behind: Media Satyricon blog.
Linky-poo's ... yummy.
(ed note: Hectic work makes it unlikely that I'll post tommorrow, sorry.)
Today was a hard day for African-American men. Terrorist freak John Allen Muhammed was given the death penalty. Jayson Blair did interviews in the media, spreading the manure. Not a good day all around for black men. Then again both Romenesko and Wonkette gave me linky-poo's on their high trafficked and super-influential sites for my Left Behind: Media Satyricon blog.
Linky-poo's ... yummy.
(ed note: Hectic work makes it unlikely that I'll post tommorrow, sorry.)
A Little of the Old In and Out
In: Heidi Klum and Seal. Beauty and talent go well together, and, since the marvelous Page Sixers have deemed this stellar coupling acceptable, why shouldn't we? The National Enquirer's Patricia Shipp gives us a step-by-step:
"The two were spotted enjoying a cozy dinner at Madeo, a restaurant in Los Angeles on February 22.
"'It was obvious that they've fallen hard for each other,' disclosed an observer.
"'After dinner at Madeo's, Heidi and Seal went to Seal's home in the Hollywood Hills where they spent the night.
"'The next morning they emerged from the house, and she gave him a kiss before they drove to a nearby Starbucks for morning coffee.
"'When Seal went inside to get coffee for the two of them, Heidi walked her dog, a cute Jack Russell terrier.
"'Seal and Heidi laughed and whispered to one another while they sipped their coffee outside.'
"Soon the two had to part as Heidi headed off to catch a plane.
"'Heidi kissed Seal once again, told him she loved him and thanked him for being so wonderful,' said the observer.
"'As she left in an SUV, Heidi turned to Seal and said, See you very soon, darling!"
"'Seal adores Heidi,' confided the insider."
Awww. You go, Seal.
Out: Paul Wolfowitz. As the Hill reports, "Tensions between the Bush administration and House Republican leaders flared last week when Deputy Secretary of Defense Paul Wolfowitz angered them by arguing that reducing President Bush's proposed defense spending would be an unpatriotic slap at the military. " Okay, Mr. Philosopher-King, angering members of Congress in your own party? That's not a good thing, Paul, even Plotinus would say, don't you think?
In: Lucy Sykes. is she shallow? Yes. But oddly compelling. FashionWeekDaily does a day in the life of Mrs. Sykes, and it is fascinating:
"8:00 pm - The YSL show. I arrived to find my friends Charlotte Stockdale and Amanda Moore across the runway from me, both predictably chic, as well as every fashionista that ever there was. Tonight's the night. Veruschka the ?60s model, Patrick Demarchelier, Bill Cunningham (we all adore him). If you weren't there, well: sorry babe. Harvey W, of course: there's something going on. Stella, of course. The show was pure Tom. Tailored with such precision. Just looking at it, you felt you'd cut yourself. Beautiful, delicate hints of chinoiserie. I am watching fashion history. At then end, as Tom walked down the runway, he was so focused. No one sat. The whole crowd was screaming. Tom wore a red smoking jacket. For a moment, I thought that he might walk past the photographers at end of runway, and we'd never see him again. When he turned to walk back, my heart pounded. He's the man who brought sex back to fashion. I fought my way through the crowd to congratulate him afterwards my heart pounding still, and when he said, calmly 'Oh yes, Lucy Sykes' I died and went to heaven. Tom Ford is my YSL. As I walked out, I asked my favorite fashion oracle, Marylou Luther, 'Isn't he the most devastating man in fashion?' 'Of course,' said Marylou, 'apart from one other. 'Who?' I asked. 'Euan,' she answered, and disappeared into the night. What has my husband been doing to these women? Tom was so in control, he had a yogic calm. As SJP said, 'Why leave the party when it's already gotten bad? Leave when it's still buzzing.'? Note the touch of shallow french existentialism that hangs about the comment made before a modish disappearance into the night. It could easily have been a snatch of dialogue from Last Tango in Paris. Lucy is as pretty as an Akkadian bass relief (and as deep). Let's train our social microscope on the specimen. Have you observed it closely. Good; carry on.
Out: Evan Bayh. For some bizarre reason, the youthful Senator from Indiana got tremendous buzz this week as a possible running mate for Kerry. That would be a bad idea. The photogenic Senator is about as exciting as a wheat field in August. Or, as Arianna Huffington says in her syndicated column, "Don't pick a VP by looking at the map. Pick someone who can help you bring soul back to American politics and appeal not just to our self-interest but to our better instincts. In other words, do not pick Evan Bayh." I couldn't have said it better myself.
In: Nader Cynicism. Sometimes I don't know whether to get really angry at Ralph Nader, or just kind of pity him as a stubborn old man nearing senility laced with bitter pessimism. I mean, in the Village Voice's Nader interview, he does the strangest thing. Really odd, because Nader's attention span is legendary. When asked "Whom do you like?" he starts of civil, then veers -- almost immediately -- into the avenue of The Darkness, leaving us asking: This is who you Like? He answers:
"Edwards, although he's no courageous champion. He didn't make one speech defending the civil justice system, which is his forte. So that tells you something�‚—it is under massive attack by about 10 bills in Congress. Also, on foreign relations and military, he's terrible."
That some real thug love, Ralph!
Out: The exercisee Move of the Month. Greg Lindsay of WWD has a good time reporting of the crazy goings on at YM. "Now, several sources close to (YM) said (Editor in Chief Linda) Fears is spooking the staff by making a slew of last-minute changes to the May issue, which will bear neither her nor (former editor in chief Christina) Kelly�‚’s name. The diary, news and college sections �‚— all Kelly favorites �‚— have already been cut, and even more frightening to them is Fears�‚’ first big idea: a new health section featuring an 'Exercise Move of the Month.' For a staff reared on Kelly�‚’s let-the-advertisers-be-damned approach, it�‚’s causing shudders all around." Shudders, people, shudders.
In: Michael Musto of the Village Voice always gets the scoop. This week he writes of his trip to Miami at Jade: "By the antipasto tables, I asked MICHAEL IMPERIOLI how the show's changed his life, and before he could answer, he was interrupted by a stampede of fans and well-wishers. 'That's how it's changed my life,' he said, beaming. His views on gay marriage? 'That's a no-brainer,' said Imperioli. 'If people love each other, they should be able to get married.' And so should LIZA and DAVID, and BRITNEY and JASON, and even DREW BARRYMORE and TOM GREEN."
In: Heidi Klum and Seal. Beauty and talent go well together, and, since the marvelous Page Sixers have deemed this stellar coupling acceptable, why shouldn't we? The National Enquirer's Patricia Shipp gives us a step-by-step:
"The two were spotted enjoying a cozy dinner at Madeo, a restaurant in Los Angeles on February 22.
"'It was obvious that they've fallen hard for each other,' disclosed an observer.
"'After dinner at Madeo's, Heidi and Seal went to Seal's home in the Hollywood Hills where they spent the night.
"'The next morning they emerged from the house, and she gave him a kiss before they drove to a nearby Starbucks for morning coffee.
"'When Seal went inside to get coffee for the two of them, Heidi walked her dog, a cute Jack Russell terrier.
"'Seal and Heidi laughed and whispered to one another while they sipped their coffee outside.'
"Soon the two had to part as Heidi headed off to catch a plane.
"'Heidi kissed Seal once again, told him she loved him and thanked him for being so wonderful,' said the observer.
"'As she left in an SUV, Heidi turned to Seal and said, See you very soon, darling!"
"'Seal adores Heidi,' confided the insider."
Awww. You go, Seal.
Out: Paul Wolfowitz. As the Hill reports, "Tensions between the Bush administration and House Republican leaders flared last week when Deputy Secretary of Defense Paul Wolfowitz angered them by arguing that reducing President Bush's proposed defense spending would be an unpatriotic slap at the military. " Okay, Mr. Philosopher-King, angering members of Congress in your own party? That's not a good thing, Paul, even Plotinus would say, don't you think?
In: Lucy Sykes. is she shallow? Yes. But oddly compelling. FashionWeekDaily does a day in the life of Mrs. Sykes, and it is fascinating:
"8:00 pm - The YSL show. I arrived to find my friends Charlotte Stockdale and Amanda Moore across the runway from me, both predictably chic, as well as every fashionista that ever there was. Tonight's the night. Veruschka the ?60s model, Patrick Demarchelier, Bill Cunningham (we all adore him). If you weren't there, well: sorry babe. Harvey W, of course: there's something going on. Stella, of course. The show was pure Tom. Tailored with such precision. Just looking at it, you felt you'd cut yourself. Beautiful, delicate hints of chinoiserie. I am watching fashion history. At then end, as Tom walked down the runway, he was so focused. No one sat. The whole crowd was screaming. Tom wore a red smoking jacket. For a moment, I thought that he might walk past the photographers at end of runway, and we'd never see him again. When he turned to walk back, my heart pounded. He's the man who brought sex back to fashion. I fought my way through the crowd to congratulate him afterwards my heart pounding still, and when he said, calmly 'Oh yes, Lucy Sykes' I died and went to heaven. Tom Ford is my YSL. As I walked out, I asked my favorite fashion oracle, Marylou Luther, 'Isn't he the most devastating man in fashion?' 'Of course,' said Marylou, 'apart from one other. 'Who?' I asked. 'Euan,' she answered, and disappeared into the night. What has my husband been doing to these women? Tom was so in control, he had a yogic calm. As SJP said, 'Why leave the party when it's already gotten bad? Leave when it's still buzzing.'? Note the touch of shallow french existentialism that hangs about the comment made before a modish disappearance into the night. It could easily have been a snatch of dialogue from Last Tango in Paris. Lucy is as pretty as an Akkadian bass relief (and as deep). Let's train our social microscope on the specimen. Have you observed it closely. Good; carry on.
Out: Evan Bayh. For some bizarre reason, the youthful Senator from Indiana got tremendous buzz this week as a possible running mate for Kerry. That would be a bad idea. The photogenic Senator is about as exciting as a wheat field in August. Or, as Arianna Huffington says in her syndicated column, "Don't pick a VP by looking at the map. Pick someone who can help you bring soul back to American politics and appeal not just to our self-interest but to our better instincts. In other words, do not pick Evan Bayh." I couldn't have said it better myself.
In: Nader Cynicism. Sometimes I don't know whether to get really angry at Ralph Nader, or just kind of pity him as a stubborn old man nearing senility laced with bitter pessimism. I mean, in the Village Voice's Nader interview, he does the strangest thing. Really odd, because Nader's attention span is legendary. When asked "Whom do you like?" he starts of civil, then veers -- almost immediately -- into the avenue of The Darkness, leaving us asking: This is who you Like? He answers:
"Edwards, although he's no courageous champion. He didn't make one speech defending the civil justice system, which is his forte. So that tells you something�‚—it is under massive attack by about 10 bills in Congress. Also, on foreign relations and military, he's terrible."
That some real thug love, Ralph!
Out: The exercisee Move of the Month. Greg Lindsay of WWD has a good time reporting of the crazy goings on at YM. "Now, several sources close to (YM) said (Editor in Chief Linda) Fears is spooking the staff by making a slew of last-minute changes to the May issue, which will bear neither her nor (former editor in chief Christina) Kelly�‚’s name. The diary, news and college sections �‚— all Kelly favorites �‚— have already been cut, and even more frightening to them is Fears�‚’ first big idea: a new health section featuring an 'Exercise Move of the Month.' For a staff reared on Kelly�‚’s let-the-advertisers-be-damned approach, it�‚’s causing shudders all around." Shudders, people, shudders.
In: Michael Musto of the Village Voice always gets the scoop. This week he writes of his trip to Miami at Jade: "By the antipasto tables, I asked MICHAEL IMPERIOLI how the show's changed his life, and before he could answer, he was interrupted by a stampede of fans and well-wishers. 'That's how it's changed my life,' he said, beaming. His views on gay marriage? 'That's a no-brainer,' said Imperioli. 'If people love each other, they should be able to get married.' And so should LIZA and DAVID, and BRITNEY and JASON, and even DREW BARRYMORE and TOM GREEN."
Michael Gross Blacklisted?! Oh, Hell no!
The Corsair likes Michael Gross, in fact, we consider him an acquaintance/friend, exchanging emails over the years on media and career matters. So when I read Lloyd Grove's account that Michael Gross may be blacklisted because of his incendiary but fair account of Ralph Lauren's life, the red flags went up. Grove writes:
"One New York fashionista is wondering whether the devil wears Polo.
"Writer Michael Gross claims he's been blacklisted by major glossy magazines since his unauthorized book, Genuine Authentic: The Real Life of Ralph Lauren, which just came out in paperback, first appeared.
"Gross, a former News columnist, said one 'top fashion magazine editor' recently told him that he shouldn't expect to get work from big-name magazines for a long time. 'He said I was radioactive - for 200 million reasons,' the writer added.
"A Ralph Lauren spokeswoman replied that any suggestion the company was putting pressure on magazines not to use Gross was 'completely untrue.'
Well, I certainly hope so, spokeswoman for Ralph Lauren, for your sake and the sake of your employer, because The Corsair is in the mood for some media attention for being loud and I am also in the mood to pick a new punching toy. Things have been slow going, and what better way to spice up the blogosphere than start a war with a comapny messing with my buddy. (puffs out chest) I'm old school like that.
The Corsair likes Michael Gross, in fact, we consider him an acquaintance/friend, exchanging emails over the years on media and career matters. So when I read Lloyd Grove's account that Michael Gross may be blacklisted because of his incendiary but fair account of Ralph Lauren's life, the red flags went up. Grove writes:
"One New York fashionista is wondering whether the devil wears Polo.
"Writer Michael Gross claims he's been blacklisted by major glossy magazines since his unauthorized book, Genuine Authentic: The Real Life of Ralph Lauren, which just came out in paperback, first appeared.
"Gross, a former News columnist, said one 'top fashion magazine editor' recently told him that he shouldn't expect to get work from big-name magazines for a long time. 'He said I was radioactive - for 200 million reasons,' the writer added.
"A Ralph Lauren spokeswoman replied that any suggestion the company was putting pressure on magazines not to use Gross was 'completely untrue.'
Well, I certainly hope so, spokeswoman for Ralph Lauren, for your sake and the sake of your employer, because The Corsair is in the mood for some media attention for being loud and I am also in the mood to pick a new punching toy. Things have been slow going, and what better way to spice up the blogosphere than start a war with a comapny messing with my buddy. (puffs out chest) I'm old school like that.
Monday, March 08, 2004
Al Sharpton to Get Fox TV Show?
Presidential candidate Al Sharpton may get his own Fox Tv Show, according to the New York Times.
Jim Rutenberg of the Times writes:
"Mr. Sharpton, who retained the William Morris talent agency two weeks ago, said he wanted to be the host of his own cable news and radio programs, and his talent representatives said they were pursuing talks with all conceivable outlets.
"But, perhaps unsurprisingly for a man who is running for president, Mr. Sharpton's media ambitions do not stop there. He has already had an informal discussion with Fox Television Studios about a possible reality television show, officials there said on Friday. And he recently met with Sid Ganis, the Hollywood producer who included Mr. Sharpton in the 2002 remake of 'Mr. Deeds,' to discuss future roles.
"'For months they were saying to me from various parts of the media world that they wanted me to do a syndicated radio show, a syndicated TV show, and now these guys with a reality show,' Mr. Sharpton said. 'I said I wanted to wait for the end of the campaign. Now that we're halfway through, I told William Morris to go and complete some deals.'''
The William Morris Agency? What the fuck? Aint that a bitch: Sharpton goes Hollywood, huh. Tucker Carlson broke the scoop yesterday on the Chris Matthews Show that the Reverend had had a meeting with Roger Ailes at Fox. So, I guess his appearance at the Presidential debates was all a big audition. His purpose within the Democratic Party, as a jester and a Shakespearean fool, is over and the Rev is going big time. Who knew?
Presidential candidate Al Sharpton may get his own Fox Tv Show, according to the New York Times.
Jim Rutenberg of the Times writes:
"Mr. Sharpton, who retained the William Morris talent agency two weeks ago, said he wanted to be the host of his own cable news and radio programs, and his talent representatives said they were pursuing talks with all conceivable outlets.
"But, perhaps unsurprisingly for a man who is running for president, Mr. Sharpton's media ambitions do not stop there. He has already had an informal discussion with Fox Television Studios about a possible reality television show, officials there said on Friday. And he recently met with Sid Ganis, the Hollywood producer who included Mr. Sharpton in the 2002 remake of 'Mr. Deeds,' to discuss future roles.
"'For months they were saying to me from various parts of the media world that they wanted me to do a syndicated radio show, a syndicated TV show, and now these guys with a reality show,' Mr. Sharpton said. 'I said I wanted to wait for the end of the campaign. Now that we're halfway through, I told William Morris to go and complete some deals.'''
The William Morris Agency? What the fuck? Aint that a bitch: Sharpton goes Hollywood, huh. Tucker Carlson broke the scoop yesterday on the Chris Matthews Show that the Reverend had had a meeting with Roger Ailes at Fox. So, I guess his appearance at the Presidential debates was all a big audition. His purpose within the Democratic Party, as a jester and a Shakespearean fool, is over and the Rev is going big time. Who knew?
Jann Wenner: "I laugh at that criticism"
On March 5th, Jann Wenner, editor at Rolling Stone, defended himself from all the charges in the media that Rolling Stone has sold it's ass cheaper than a trick at the Tony Soprano's Bada Bing Club. Here is a private portion of his Billboard Interview with Carla Hay:
Carla Hay: Others say the magazine has gotten soft. How do you respond?
Jann Wenner: "I think the criticism is bulls--t. I laugh at that criticism."
Disturbing laughter echoes through the blogosphere.
I refer readers to The Corsair Award, granted December 27, 2003:
"The Most Irrelevant Magazine pirate goes to Rolling Stone. I am of two minds on the subject. First, May 3, 1998, to me, was the day the music died. Rolling Stone Magazine, the embodiment of hip counterculture colluded with the Giuliani adminitration as a corporate sponsor for "Family Day" to displace the Million Marijuana March from Washington Square Park. No lie.
"Also: putting April Lavigne on the cover of March 2003 was a very sad reminder that even though the music has died at Rolling Stone, the stink still lingers like a fucking puddle of stillwater at 1290 Avenue of the Americas."
And the criticism laughs right back at you, Jann, baby.
On March 5th, Jann Wenner, editor at Rolling Stone, defended himself from all the charges in the media that Rolling Stone has sold it's ass cheaper than a trick at the Tony Soprano's Bada Bing Club. Here is a private portion of his Billboard Interview with Carla Hay:
Carla Hay: Others say the magazine has gotten soft. How do you respond?
Jann Wenner: "I think the criticism is bulls--t. I laugh at that criticism."
Disturbing laughter echoes through the blogosphere.
I refer readers to The Corsair Award, granted December 27, 2003:
"The Most Irrelevant Magazine pirate goes to Rolling Stone. I am of two minds on the subject. First, May 3, 1998, to me, was the day the music died. Rolling Stone Magazine, the embodiment of hip counterculture colluded with the Giuliani adminitration as a corporate sponsor for "Family Day" to displace the Million Marijuana March from Washington Square Park. No lie.
"Also: putting April Lavigne on the cover of March 2003 was a very sad reminder that even though the music has died at Rolling Stone, the stink still lingers like a fucking puddle of stillwater at 1290 Avenue of the Americas."
And the criticism laughs right back at you, Jann, baby.
A Little of the Old In and Out
In: Former US Senator and Presidential Candidate (as well as super-intellectual) Gary Hart is odds on favorite to replace retiring Senator Ben Nighthorse Campbell (R-Colo.) if he wants the seat. Hart, who recently received a PhD in Philosophy at Oxford, has written ably on Kierkegaard, Jefferson, and an immensely useful and creative retooling of Machiavelli's Prince for our Democracy called, The Patriot, is indeed that.
When he is not writing novels, practicing international law or brushing up on his Russian studies, Gart Hart is at his ranch in Colorado -- like a philosopher king -- observing the decline of Western Civilization. Run, Gary, run.
Out: Dick Cheney. Apparently at the Gridiron Dinner, Cheney quipped, according to Hillnews, "I always feel a genuine bond whenever I see Senator Clinton. She's the only person who's the center of more conspiracy theories than I am." Yeah, uhm, did you hear the one about Bush replacing you with Giuliani at the NY convention, Soprano-style, Dick?
In: Manley Moonlighting Governors. What is it about the tag team of Ventura and Shwarzenegger ("weighing in at a combined weight of 600 lbs, from parts unknown The Masked Governators!") First Ventura moonlighted on Vince McMahon's gloriously doomed XFL, then, Arnie -- get this -- moonlights as an "editor/predator" at ultralowbrow men 18-35 demographic 'Flex' and 'Muscle and Fitness.' What-the-fuck?! Will the next Governor of New York be an anchor at ESPN? Perhaps the bigger story, as a result of 9/11, is the incredible rise of manliness -- the Iliad, Alexander the Great flic, HBO's wild west manly tale Tombstone, Gibson's bloody Christ who takes his licks like a man. It's a man's world, it seems, though we'd like to see some Grrl power in the mix.
Out: Liberals. Ever since Bush the Elder trounced Mike Dukakis for being a card carrying member, it has not been cool to be lib. Now, however, even Ralph Nader can barely conceal his contempt when he utters the words, "liberal intelligencia" to refer to his opponents on his right, who have asked him to not run for president. You know life sucks for libs when Nader is hating on you.
Being called a liberal is like being called weak and human beings -- especially in this adenoidal era -- regard weakness as Evil. Good and Evil are irrelevant: all that exists is Strong and Weak. Being Strong is better than being Good; being Strong is better than being Just; Being strong is better than being Smart. And Being Liberal, alas, is not perceived as being strong.
In: Ken Auletta. Auletta is a class act, and he showed an incredible amount of patience on Tina Brown's Topic A last night, sandwiched in between the seriously stupid Kinky Friedman cadidate for Governor of Texas ("to hell with corporations!", the matronly Susan Cheever ("I don't care who runs Disney, just as long as they keep making movies that keep my kids quiet") and Rocco Landesman, who made facile points about the shocking -- shocking! -- anti CEO climate.
In that mix of stupidity, Auletta shone, stating facts and figures as well as reasoned arguments about Disney. Way to go, Ken; then again, what was Tina thinking?
Out: C-SPAN Delay. After 25 years, Howard Stern's band of merry pranksters is causing C-Span CEO Brian Lamb to consider adding a pause to live phone discussions. Not that I watch those call in shows that offer elderly retirees a chance to rant ad nauseum in shrill, semi-senile disembodied voices about the Illuminati's hold over our government, and the good old days of "Cal" Coolidge, but this is a sad testament to the fact that we -- America -- are no longer young.
IN: Kurt Andersen. Anderson writes in this week's New York:
"One has the friends one has, and one doesn�t tend to choose them carefully. I wouldn�t call myself a friend of Martha Stewart�s, but I know her. A few years ago, during a coffee break at a technology conference, we had a pleasant conversation about public radio and�this was the best�the excellence of the steamed-milk froth on our free Starbucks lattes. A few years before that, she had invited me to a large dinner party at Nobu where Sam Waksal was present. (At that dinner, I happened to exchange a friendly glance with Calvin Klein, whom I had met exactly once before, but who nevertheless acted in that moment as if we were good friends, mouthing the words �Are you okay?� from across the room, since a few weeks earlier I had been fired as the editor of this magazine.)" Did he mention Latrell?
In: Former US Senator and Presidential Candidate (as well as super-intellectual) Gary Hart is odds on favorite to replace retiring Senator Ben Nighthorse Campbell (R-Colo.) if he wants the seat. Hart, who recently received a PhD in Philosophy at Oxford, has written ably on Kierkegaard, Jefferson, and an immensely useful and creative retooling of Machiavelli's Prince for our Democracy called, The Patriot, is indeed that.
When he is not writing novels, practicing international law or brushing up on his Russian studies, Gart Hart is at his ranch in Colorado -- like a philosopher king -- observing the decline of Western Civilization. Run, Gary, run.
Out: Dick Cheney. Apparently at the Gridiron Dinner, Cheney quipped, according to Hillnews, "I always feel a genuine bond whenever I see Senator Clinton. She's the only person who's the center of more conspiracy theories than I am." Yeah, uhm, did you hear the one about Bush replacing you with Giuliani at the NY convention, Soprano-style, Dick?
In: Manley Moonlighting Governors. What is it about the tag team of Ventura and Shwarzenegger ("weighing in at a combined weight of 600 lbs, from parts unknown The Masked Governators!") First Ventura moonlighted on Vince McMahon's gloriously doomed XFL, then, Arnie -- get this -- moonlights as an "editor/predator" at ultralowbrow men 18-35 demographic 'Flex' and 'Muscle and Fitness.' What-the-fuck?! Will the next Governor of New York be an anchor at ESPN? Perhaps the bigger story, as a result of 9/11, is the incredible rise of manliness -- the Iliad, Alexander the Great flic, HBO's wild west manly tale Tombstone, Gibson's bloody Christ who takes his licks like a man. It's a man's world, it seems, though we'd like to see some Grrl power in the mix.
Out: Liberals. Ever since Bush the Elder trounced Mike Dukakis for being a card carrying member, it has not been cool to be lib. Now, however, even Ralph Nader can barely conceal his contempt when he utters the words, "liberal intelligencia" to refer to his opponents on his right, who have asked him to not run for president. You know life sucks for libs when Nader is hating on you.
Being called a liberal is like being called weak and human beings -- especially in this adenoidal era -- regard weakness as Evil. Good and Evil are irrelevant: all that exists is Strong and Weak. Being Strong is better than being Good; being Strong is better than being Just; Being strong is better than being Smart. And Being Liberal, alas, is not perceived as being strong.
In: Ken Auletta. Auletta is a class act, and he showed an incredible amount of patience on Tina Brown's Topic A last night, sandwiched in between the seriously stupid Kinky Friedman cadidate for Governor of Texas ("to hell with corporations!", the matronly Susan Cheever ("I don't care who runs Disney, just as long as they keep making movies that keep my kids quiet") and Rocco Landesman, who made facile points about the shocking -- shocking! -- anti CEO climate.
In that mix of stupidity, Auletta shone, stating facts and figures as well as reasoned arguments about Disney. Way to go, Ken; then again, what was Tina thinking?
Out: C-SPAN Delay. After 25 years, Howard Stern's band of merry pranksters is causing C-Span CEO Brian Lamb to consider adding a pause to live phone discussions. Not that I watch those call in shows that offer elderly retirees a chance to rant ad nauseum in shrill, semi-senile disembodied voices about the Illuminati's hold over our government, and the good old days of "Cal" Coolidge, but this is a sad testament to the fact that we -- America -- are no longer young.
IN: Kurt Andersen. Anderson writes in this week's New York:
"One has the friends one has, and one doesn�t tend to choose them carefully. I wouldn�t call myself a friend of Martha Stewart�s, but I know her. A few years ago, during a coffee break at a technology conference, we had a pleasant conversation about public radio and�this was the best�the excellence of the steamed-milk froth on our free Starbucks lattes. A few years before that, she had invited me to a large dinner party at Nobu where Sam Waksal was present. (At that dinner, I happened to exchange a friendly glance with Calvin Klein, whom I had met exactly once before, but who nevertheless acted in that moment as if we were good friends, mouthing the words �Are you okay?� from across the room, since a few weeks earlier I had been fired as the editor of this magazine.)" Did he mention Latrell?
Saturday, March 06, 2004
Media: Left Behind
"Without any warning, passengers on an airborne Boeing 747 mysteriously disappear from their seats. Nothing remains except rumpled piles of clothing. Terror and chaos reign worldwide as the cataclysm unfolds. For those left behind, the apocalypse has just begun."
Tim LeHaye and Jerry Jenkins' turgid, ridiculous novel, Left Behind has gotten major publicity lately as the holidays near, the newsweekly magazine's clamor, and Mel Gibson's The Passion of The Christ tops the box office. Of course, the "leftist blue state media cultural elite" remain skeptical. But should they? What would happen if The Rapture came to the Wednesday's lunch crowd at Michael's? We wonder ... (dreamy music)
Dramatis Personnae:
Christopher Hitchens: Surprisingly whisked away, leaving behind a tumbler full of Johnny Walker Black.
The pervasive soullessness of the HuffPo was cited in Arianna Huffington being Left Behind.
Bill Keller: Left behind. Everyone in heaven thought his Julian Assange piece was overwrought.
Anna Wintour: Whisked to heaven. Bob Marley put in a good word for the editrix.
Elizabeth Spiers: Whisked to Heaven; the patron saint of bloggers.
Nick Denton: Left behind, gloriously, and he wouldn't have it any other way.
Henry Blodget: After a rough start he is whisked away to heaven for his second act. God always makes way for late vocations.
Tim Russert: Whisked upwards to a celebratory dinner with Pat Moynihan, Pope Leo XIII, Kierkegarrd and Disraeli, all of whom have already began on the peppery cognacs, all the while making acute observations on the unfolding scene.
Rachel Sklar: Already one step ahead of you, networking with the movers and shakers in The Empyrean (Heaven's VVIP Room).
Bonnie Fuller: Mysteriously vanished, to heaven, to better press, leaving sandwich crumbs to the consternation of her bitchy detractors.
Lockhart Steele: Will soon be blogging on the real estate doings of the city in the clouds.
Howie Kurtz: Whisked to heaven in time to sup with Eric Sevareid and Marshall McLuhan.
Rupert Murdoch: Take a guess ..
David Simon: St Peter asked him why so many influentials who loved The Wire never did anything about the bleak urban situation on earth just before admitting him to Heaven.
Graydon Carter: mysteriously vanished, leaving Saville Row suit and Winston Light cigarette ashes.
Don Imus: Left behind. Way behind. God didn't like his face.
Howard Stern: Left behind for asking Princess Diana at the pearly gates when she lost his virginity ..
Felix Dennis: left behind and proud of the fact, yelling at the sky "Better to reign in hell than serve in heaven."
Jim Romenesko: Whisked to heaven leaving behind thousands of anxious journos with no place to get their hot media scoop.
Harry Evans and Tina Brown: One whisked away heavenward, one left behind, creating a bit of an Event-oid in the media.
Donald Trump: You fucking kidding me? Left behind. serves on the boards of director's of several of the Antichrist's companies. Has several lucrative subcontracting gigs with Iblis. Reciting elegiacal couplets.
Dick Parsons: Whisked away; Gerald Levin: Left Behind
Roger Ebert: Wisked Away; Roeper: Left Behind
Marty Peretz: Left Behind. When God Himself wrote a letter to TNR to explain the decision, Peretz heavily edited it.
Eric Alterman: Surprising everyone, he is Left Behind.
Ralph Nader: Left Behind; Nader retaliates by running for God in 2012.
Kurt Anderson: Kurt finally has a chance to write about Celestial Architecture.
Christiane Amanpour and Jamie Rubin: Later this week, Amanpour reports on living conditions in Hell and possible breaches of Canon Law in the treatment of devils.
Martha Stewart: Surprisingly whisked away at the end of her prison term after finding Jesus at Club Fed. Offers splendid tips on the beautification of Heaven and cleaning the pearly gates.
Dennis Miller: Oh, God, Left Behind. In the Divine Plan, he will have a show, in primetime, that will serve as punishment for the perverse nature of fallen man left behind.
Michael Hirschorn: Whisked away to heaven. In charge of Ultimate Reality programming featuring the best -- and not the worst -- in humankind on the other side.
Charlie Rose: Whisked heavenward, whereupon he immediately gravitated towards the high rollers -- the St. Peter crowd. Still hoping to interview The Big Guy.
Katrina Van Den Heuvel: Whisked away to a better place with higher human rights standard.
Les Moonves: Left behind and soon headed for the place that smells like egg salad 24/7
Bill Kristol: Left behind to search for wepons of mass destruction.
Chris Matthews: Surprisingly whisked away, only to get on the nerves of FDR, constantly interrupting ...
Diane Sawyer: Left behind on account of "poised, creamy insincerity"
Andre Leon Talley: whisked away leaving a fabulous wardrobe.
Richard Johnson: Whisked away. Word is he knew something on someone manning the velvet rope
Michael Wolff: Whisked away, but immediately gets into arguments with several people at the entrance.
Michael Musto: Whisked to heaven, where he was immediatley fitted with a fab pair of wings.
Jon Stewart: Left behind to head up the resistance in the media to the antichrist, then whisked up angelically in a whirlwind of light before the Rapture.
Bill Mahar: Surprisingly whisked away to heaven, but is still bitter that it occurred just as his HBO show was a critical hit.
Geraldo Rivera: Left behind, but makes the best of his time and ambition, chasing the antichrist for an exclusive.
Steven Colbert: Whisked heavenward; his irony kept the spirits up in heaven during the gloomy Bush years.
David Patrick Columbia: Now reporting on the highest of the highest orders of Reality.
Liz Smith: whisked away to heaven, where she landed a dinner seat between Petronius and Marcel Proust.
George Stephanopoulos: Surprisingly left behind, drinking the black wine of Cahors, elixir of Popes, Playing an eerie tune on a reed pipe in homage to the antichrist!
basta!
"Without any warning, passengers on an airborne Boeing 747 mysteriously disappear from their seats. Nothing remains except rumpled piles of clothing. Terror and chaos reign worldwide as the cataclysm unfolds. For those left behind, the apocalypse has just begun."
Tim LeHaye and Jerry Jenkins' turgid, ridiculous novel, Left Behind has gotten major publicity lately as the holidays near, the newsweekly magazine's clamor, and Mel Gibson's The Passion of The Christ tops the box office. Of course, the "leftist blue state media cultural elite" remain skeptical. But should they? What would happen if The Rapture came to the Wednesday's lunch crowd at Michael's? We wonder ... (dreamy music)
Dramatis Personnae:
Christopher Hitchens: Surprisingly whisked away, leaving behind a tumbler full of Johnny Walker Black.
The pervasive soullessness of the HuffPo was cited in Arianna Huffington being Left Behind.
Bill Keller: Left behind. Everyone in heaven thought his Julian Assange piece was overwrought.
Anna Wintour: Whisked to heaven. Bob Marley put in a good word for the editrix.
Elizabeth Spiers: Whisked to Heaven; the patron saint of bloggers.
Nick Denton: Left behind, gloriously, and he wouldn't have it any other way.
Henry Blodget: After a rough start he is whisked away to heaven for his second act. God always makes way for late vocations.
Tim Russert: Whisked upwards to a celebratory dinner with Pat Moynihan, Pope Leo XIII, Kierkegarrd and Disraeli, all of whom have already began on the peppery cognacs, all the while making acute observations on the unfolding scene.
Rachel Sklar: Already one step ahead of you, networking with the movers and shakers in The Empyrean (Heaven's VVIP Room).
Bonnie Fuller: Mysteriously vanished, to heaven, to better press, leaving sandwich crumbs to the consternation of her bitchy detractors.
Lockhart Steele: Will soon be blogging on the real estate doings of the city in the clouds.
Howie Kurtz: Whisked to heaven in time to sup with Eric Sevareid and Marshall McLuhan.
Rupert Murdoch: Take a guess ..
David Simon: St Peter asked him why so many influentials who loved The Wire never did anything about the bleak urban situation on earth just before admitting him to Heaven.
Graydon Carter: mysteriously vanished, leaving Saville Row suit and Winston Light cigarette ashes.
Don Imus: Left behind. Way behind. God didn't like his face.
Howard Stern: Left behind for asking Princess Diana at the pearly gates when she lost his virginity ..
Felix Dennis: left behind and proud of the fact, yelling at the sky "Better to reign in hell than serve in heaven."
Jim Romenesko: Whisked to heaven leaving behind thousands of anxious journos with no place to get their hot media scoop.
Harry Evans and Tina Brown: One whisked away heavenward, one left behind, creating a bit of an Event-oid in the media.
Donald Trump: You fucking kidding me? Left behind. serves on the boards of director's of several of the Antichrist's companies. Has several lucrative subcontracting gigs with Iblis. Reciting elegiacal couplets.
Dick Parsons: Whisked away; Gerald Levin: Left Behind
Roger Ebert: Wisked Away; Roeper: Left Behind
Marty Peretz: Left Behind. When God Himself wrote a letter to TNR to explain the decision, Peretz heavily edited it.
Eric Alterman: Surprising everyone, he is Left Behind.
Ralph Nader: Left Behind; Nader retaliates by running for God in 2012.
Kurt Anderson: Kurt finally has a chance to write about Celestial Architecture.
Christiane Amanpour and Jamie Rubin: Later this week, Amanpour reports on living conditions in Hell and possible breaches of Canon Law in the treatment of devils.
Martha Stewart: Surprisingly whisked away at the end of her prison term after finding Jesus at Club Fed. Offers splendid tips on the beautification of Heaven and cleaning the pearly gates.
Dennis Miller: Oh, God, Left Behind. In the Divine Plan, he will have a show, in primetime, that will serve as punishment for the perverse nature of fallen man left behind.
Michael Hirschorn: Whisked away to heaven. In charge of Ultimate Reality programming featuring the best -- and not the worst -- in humankind on the other side.
Charlie Rose: Whisked heavenward, whereupon he immediately gravitated towards the high rollers -- the St. Peter crowd. Still hoping to interview The Big Guy.
Katrina Van Den Heuvel: Whisked away to a better place with higher human rights standard.
Les Moonves: Left behind and soon headed for the place that smells like egg salad 24/7
Bill Kristol: Left behind to search for wepons of mass destruction.
Chris Matthews: Surprisingly whisked away, only to get on the nerves of FDR, constantly interrupting ...
Diane Sawyer: Left behind on account of "poised, creamy insincerity"
Andre Leon Talley: whisked away leaving a fabulous wardrobe.
Richard Johnson: Whisked away. Word is he knew something on someone manning the velvet rope
Michael Wolff: Whisked away, but immediately gets into arguments with several people at the entrance.
Michael Musto: Whisked to heaven, where he was immediatley fitted with a fab pair of wings.
Jon Stewart: Left behind to head up the resistance in the media to the antichrist, then whisked up angelically in a whirlwind of light before the Rapture.
Bill Mahar: Surprisingly whisked away to heaven, but is still bitter that it occurred just as his HBO show was a critical hit.
Geraldo Rivera: Left behind, but makes the best of his time and ambition, chasing the antichrist for an exclusive.
Steven Colbert: Whisked heavenward; his irony kept the spirits up in heaven during the gloomy Bush years.
David Patrick Columbia: Now reporting on the highest of the highest orders of Reality.
Liz Smith: whisked away to heaven, where she landed a dinner seat between Petronius and Marcel Proust.
George Stephanopoulos: Surprisingly left behind, drinking the black wine of Cahors, elixir of Popes, Playing an eerie tune on a reed pipe in homage to the antichrist!
basta!
(Janet Jackson photos below this blog; scroll down)
A Little of the Old In and Out
In:
Bonnie Fuller. I read, with horror, the Vanity Fair (Unfair) profile of Bonnie, which brought up everything from a sad incident in her impoverished past with a Marshall, coworkers fouling her food, her children's pictures that adorn her door at work and the bitchy comments that co-workers have made about them, but The Kicker gets it right when they start reporting on the crumbs in her sammich. Overkill. Just because someone is a perfectionist doesn't make her media punching bag number one. Charles Manson shouldn't be treated in the manner Bonnie is treated. The Corsair is now, 100 percent pro-Bonnie Fuller. You can kick a girl only so much before this 145 pound African wolfpack steps up to the plate, Ninja-Style. Never let em see you sweat, Fuller; I got your back.
Out:
Lizzy Grubman. As Cindy Adams reports, "LIZZIE Grubman heading for an 'Apprentice'-type MTV show come Sep tember. Winner gets a p.r. job. 'I'm knocking off Donald,' she says." And I hope she means in the ratings and not some more of the old SUV treatment.
In:
Hugs not drugs. Gothamist gives you your very own chance to air your thoughts on the most interesting picture in the world currently circulating. Pimp Snoop Dogg mesmerizing The Olsen Twins, the most powerful media force in the world, no, the galaxy, with his funkadelic chalice and syrupy pimp juice. Caption this puppy, please. Please.
In:
Israeli Porn. Variety writes, "Israel's High Court of Justice unanimously ruled on Wednesday that the Playboy channel can continue to be broadcast in the holy land, thereby ending three years of legal sparring over the legality of its broadcasts. The special 11-justice panel rejected two petitions against the adult channel on cable and satellite television in Israel, but, amazingly, the judge decided to uphold the freedom of expression and even noted that the pornographic content of the channel was 'relatively light.'"
Out:
Celebrity Religion. Yesterday we blasted Jim Carrey and his pseudo religiosity that emerged from his forgotten Randian tint. Now Jeff Bridges, on his weblog, espouses some poo poo religiosity, "Free your heart from hatred, Free your mind from worries, Live simply, Give more, Expect less." Less cliche, eff, now shut up and act.
In:
The Passion of The Lisa Whelchel. Lisa Whelchel, who played Blair Warner on Facts of Life heartily endorses The Passion of the Christ in her blog, "I have been struck lately with �the power of one!� What a difference � what a life-difference, one person, obeying their call can make in this world. Obviously, a very recent example of this is Mel Gibson. What a worldwide impact this one man, just doing what the Lord prompted him to do, is going to have on eternity.
"(I like what [her daughter] said last week when we were discussing this. She said, �Does this mean that Mel Gibson is a Christian?� I answered, 'Apparently, so.' She quickly responded, 'Cool! I�d love to spend eternity with Mel Gibson!')" You, Blair, and tens of millions of annoying "crossover" music listeners.
Out:
Cindy Crawford's marriage is very out. Most bloggers figured this one out when Page Six ran the blind item about the philandering husband who frequents bars and his former supermodel wife.
Now, Star Magazine, that significant cultural artifact, pokes at the burning embers, "On Feb. 26, five-and-a- half years (and two kids) into their seemingly model marriage, Cindy Crawford and husband Rande Gerber strolled outside a Brentwood, Calif., gym. As they walked side-by-side, arms interlaced, they kissed in the parking lot, looking like the perfect devoted husband and wife.
"Coincidentally or not, the day before Cindy and Rande's public display of affection, an item in The New York Post's Page Six gossip column reported the marriage of a 'former supermodel and her hubby' was on the rocks due to 'his constant philandering.' And although the identity of the cited couple can't be confirmed, Star has learned that bar owner Rande's philandering just may crush former supermodel's Cindy's marriage."
In:
Paul McCartney is fucking rich. The Beeb reports that, "Sir Paul McCartney's wealth is bigger than the combined fortunes of Sir Elton John, Sir Mick Jagger and Madonna, a list of the UK's richest stars reveals.
His estimated bank balance of �725m puts him top the Mail on Sunday's Rich Report 2004 for musicians.
"Sir Sean Connery leads the field of male actors, with his �66m fortune beating that of Sir Anthony Hopkins.
"And comedian Tracey Ullman, who lives in the US, is reportedly richer than Catherine Zeta Jones and Anne Robinson."
Out: The Predator/Editor. Governator Ahhnold is now going to edit magazines while running California. According to Reuters, "California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has accepted a new role for his busy schedule, that of executive editor of 'Muscle & Fitness' and 'Flex' magazines, his spokesman said on Friday." Come on, now; Arnold is a bold politician but does he even know what a dangling participle is? And no, it is not a side effect of D-balls [Dianabol].
A Little of the Old In and Out
In:
Bonnie Fuller. I read, with horror, the Vanity Fair (Unfair) profile of Bonnie, which brought up everything from a sad incident in her impoverished past with a Marshall, coworkers fouling her food, her children's pictures that adorn her door at work and the bitchy comments that co-workers have made about them, but The Kicker gets it right when they start reporting on the crumbs in her sammich. Overkill. Just because someone is a perfectionist doesn't make her media punching bag number one. Charles Manson shouldn't be treated in the manner Bonnie is treated. The Corsair is now, 100 percent pro-Bonnie Fuller. You can kick a girl only so much before this 145 pound African wolfpack steps up to the plate, Ninja-Style. Never let em see you sweat, Fuller; I got your back.
Out:
Lizzy Grubman. As Cindy Adams reports, "LIZZIE Grubman heading for an 'Apprentice'-type MTV show come Sep tember. Winner gets a p.r. job. 'I'm knocking off Donald,' she says." And I hope she means in the ratings and not some more of the old SUV treatment.
In:
Hugs not drugs. Gothamist gives you your very own chance to air your thoughts on the most interesting picture in the world currently circulating. Pimp Snoop Dogg mesmerizing The Olsen Twins, the most powerful media force in the world, no, the galaxy, with his funkadelic chalice and syrupy pimp juice. Caption this puppy, please. Please.
In:
Israeli Porn. Variety writes, "Israel's High Court of Justice unanimously ruled on Wednesday that the Playboy channel can continue to be broadcast in the holy land, thereby ending three years of legal sparring over the legality of its broadcasts. The special 11-justice panel rejected two petitions against the adult channel on cable and satellite television in Israel, but, amazingly, the judge decided to uphold the freedom of expression and even noted that the pornographic content of the channel was 'relatively light.'"
Out:
Celebrity Religion. Yesterday we blasted Jim Carrey and his pseudo religiosity that emerged from his forgotten Randian tint. Now Jeff Bridges, on his weblog, espouses some poo poo religiosity, "Free your heart from hatred, Free your mind from worries, Live simply, Give more, Expect less." Less cliche, eff, now shut up and act.
In:
The Passion of The Lisa Whelchel. Lisa Whelchel, who played Blair Warner on Facts of Life heartily endorses The Passion of the Christ in her blog, "I have been struck lately with �the power of one!� What a difference � what a life-difference, one person, obeying their call can make in this world. Obviously, a very recent example of this is Mel Gibson. What a worldwide impact this one man, just doing what the Lord prompted him to do, is going to have on eternity.
"(I like what [her daughter] said last week when we were discussing this. She said, �Does this mean that Mel Gibson is a Christian?� I answered, 'Apparently, so.' She quickly responded, 'Cool! I�d love to spend eternity with Mel Gibson!')" You, Blair, and tens of millions of annoying "crossover" music listeners.
Out:
Cindy Crawford's marriage is very out. Most bloggers figured this one out when Page Six ran the blind item about the philandering husband who frequents bars and his former supermodel wife.
Now, Star Magazine, that significant cultural artifact, pokes at the burning embers, "On Feb. 26, five-and-a- half years (and two kids) into their seemingly model marriage, Cindy Crawford and husband Rande Gerber strolled outside a Brentwood, Calif., gym. As they walked side-by-side, arms interlaced, they kissed in the parking lot, looking like the perfect devoted husband and wife.
"Coincidentally or not, the day before Cindy and Rande's public display of affection, an item in The New York Post's Page Six gossip column reported the marriage of a 'former supermodel and her hubby' was on the rocks due to 'his constant philandering.' And although the identity of the cited couple can't be confirmed, Star has learned that bar owner Rande's philandering just may crush former supermodel's Cindy's marriage."
In:
Paul McCartney is fucking rich. The Beeb reports that, "Sir Paul McCartney's wealth is bigger than the combined fortunes of Sir Elton John, Sir Mick Jagger and Madonna, a list of the UK's richest stars reveals.
His estimated bank balance of �725m puts him top the Mail on Sunday's Rich Report 2004 for musicians.
"Sir Sean Connery leads the field of male actors, with his �66m fortune beating that of Sir Anthony Hopkins.
"And comedian Tracey Ullman, who lives in the US, is reportedly richer than Catherine Zeta Jones and Anne Robinson."
Out: The Predator/Editor. Governator Ahhnold is now going to edit magazines while running California. According to Reuters, "California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger has accepted a new role for his busy schedule, that of executive editor of 'Muscle & Fitness' and 'Flex' magazines, his spokesman said on Friday." Come on, now; Arnold is a bold politician but does he even know what a dangling participle is? And no, it is not a side effect of D-balls [Dianabol].
Friday, March 05, 2004
Janet Jackson Exposed, Martha Stewart Convicted
Janet Jackson is once again, uhm, exposed in this German Magazine (warning: not safe for workplace environments). Although I am not 100 percent sure about the turquoise nail polish, and I did not take the picture in question, again, the source is adamant (okay, some guy on Velvetrope.com) that this is the real deal Those crafty Germans.
Jackson, according to The Scoop, has just been pencilled in to appear on SNL on April 10th to poke fun at herself:
"Another source familiar with the situation adds, 'She?s stayed out of the public eye since the whole Super Bowl fiasco. She?ll almost certainly do a skit that will refer to and spoof [the incident] in hopes of encouraging everyone to chill about this whole thing.'?
In other bad things celebrities do news, Martha Stewart was convicted of all counts against her. Sentencing scheduled for June 17, AP/Yahoo says:
"The jury of eight women and four men deliberated three days before convicting Stewart of all counts against her. The charges carry up to 20 years in prison, but Stewart will most certainly get much less than that under federal sentencing guidelines.
"Stewart, 62, grimaced as each count against her was read. Her eyes appeared to widen slightly.
"Her ex-stockbroker, Peter Bacanovic, 41, was convicted on all but one count against him, filing a false document."
Reuters noted early this morning that Omnimedia shares were skyrocketing, "Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia Inc. stock jumped $1.68, or 12 percent, to $15.71 in afternoon trade on the New York Stock Exchange. That's its highest level since June 2002."
But AP and the NYSE had the final wod, "Shares of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia Inc. were halted by the New York Stock Exchange on Friday shortly before the guilty verdict in her stock fraud trial was announced.
"Shares of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia rose $2.24, or 16 percent, to $16.27 before the hold was imposed at 3:02 p.m."
Margaret Cho, always outspoken, on Martha Stewart, in her blog,"It seems to me that America inherently hates it when women are wildly successful, and there is a built in punishment that comes along with that kind of wealth. I cannot follow a recipe for shit, but I can spot misogyny from miles away. Why do we hate women who beat all the odds and come out on top? Why are books written to 'expose' their financial 'deviance,' as well as their 'ambitchiness?' Double standards abound, when reality shows are devoted to the tough inner life of the poor soul who must play sorcerer's apprentice to Trump's Merlin, and from scratch making, raffia using, household tip knowing Martha Stewart is facing a possible jail sentence of twenty years. If her manner with the people she worked with was ugly, if she were truly the megalomaniac monster we are told she is, why are her male counterparts glorified for displaying the exact same behavior?"
Janet Jackson is once again, uhm, exposed in this German Magazine (warning: not safe for workplace environments). Although I am not 100 percent sure about the turquoise nail polish, and I did not take the picture in question, again, the source is adamant (okay, some guy on Velvetrope.com) that this is the real deal Those crafty Germans.
Jackson, according to The Scoop, has just been pencilled in to appear on SNL on April 10th to poke fun at herself:
"Another source familiar with the situation adds, 'She?s stayed out of the public eye since the whole Super Bowl fiasco. She?ll almost certainly do a skit that will refer to and spoof [the incident] in hopes of encouraging everyone to chill about this whole thing.'?
In other bad things celebrities do news, Martha Stewart was convicted of all counts against her. Sentencing scheduled for June 17, AP/Yahoo says:
"The jury of eight women and four men deliberated three days before convicting Stewart of all counts against her. The charges carry up to 20 years in prison, but Stewart will most certainly get much less than that under federal sentencing guidelines.
"Stewart, 62, grimaced as each count against her was read. Her eyes appeared to widen slightly.
"Her ex-stockbroker, Peter Bacanovic, 41, was convicted on all but one count against him, filing a false document."
Reuters noted early this morning that Omnimedia shares were skyrocketing, "Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia Inc. stock jumped $1.68, or 12 percent, to $15.71 in afternoon trade on the New York Stock Exchange. That's its highest level since June 2002."
But AP and the NYSE had the final wod, "Shares of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia Inc. were halted by the New York Stock Exchange on Friday shortly before the guilty verdict in her stock fraud trial was announced.
"Shares of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia rose $2.24, or 16 percent, to $16.27 before the hold was imposed at 3:02 p.m."
Margaret Cho, always outspoken, on Martha Stewart, in her blog,"It seems to me that America inherently hates it when women are wildly successful, and there is a built in punishment that comes along with that kind of wealth. I cannot follow a recipe for shit, but I can spot misogyny from miles away. Why do we hate women who beat all the odds and come out on top? Why are books written to 'expose' their financial 'deviance,' as well as their 'ambitchiness?' Double standards abound, when reality shows are devoted to the tough inner life of the poor soul who must play sorcerer's apprentice to Trump's Merlin, and from scratch making, raffia using, household tip knowing Martha Stewart is facing a possible jail sentence of twenty years. If her manner with the people she worked with was ugly, if she were truly the megalomaniac monster we are told she is, why are her male counterparts glorified for displaying the exact same behavior?"
Bonnie (Fuller) Come Lately
So there we were, listening to Beethoven's late quartets in the afternoon rain, sipping on a peppery cognac, reading Keith Kelly's NY Post piece on Bonnie Fuller, when all of a sudden, I exploded into laughter. What caused this waste of such a mature cognac?
"Staffers (at Star) are also said to be upset that Fuller frequently conducts meetings while eating a sandwich or a bun that gives off lots of crumbs. Fuller doesn't deny that she gobbles down food in front of staffers at meetings, but said it's a two-way street.
"'We're very free around here. Sometimes I have a sandwich. The other day I was at a meeting in which two staffers were eating sandwiches. We don't go out for lunch.'"
Okay, now I've heard everything. Sandwich crumbs are now media news? Look, I was never a big fan of Bonnie Fuller, but people are hitting her waaaay too hard and way too low. First that brutal -- bruutal-- Vanity Fair piece, which was just fucking nasty as far as I'm concerned, and now bitchy comments on her sammich crumbs? Come on now. Let's stick to the important things, people, like photos of Janet Jackson sunbathing nekkid and JLo's ex husband bad mouthing her.
Ya know?
Lizzie Spiers is also surprised by Crumbgate.
So there we were, listening to Beethoven's late quartets in the afternoon rain, sipping on a peppery cognac, reading Keith Kelly's NY Post piece on Bonnie Fuller, when all of a sudden, I exploded into laughter. What caused this waste of such a mature cognac?
"Staffers (at Star) are also said to be upset that Fuller frequently conducts meetings while eating a sandwich or a bun that gives off lots of crumbs. Fuller doesn't deny that she gobbles down food in front of staffers at meetings, but said it's a two-way street.
"'We're very free around here. Sometimes I have a sandwich. The other day I was at a meeting in which two staffers were eating sandwiches. We don't go out for lunch.'"
Okay, now I've heard everything. Sandwich crumbs are now media news? Look, I was never a big fan of Bonnie Fuller, but people are hitting her waaaay too hard and way too low. First that brutal -- bruutal-- Vanity Fair piece, which was just fucking nasty as far as I'm concerned, and now bitchy comments on her sammich crumbs? Come on now. Let's stick to the important things, people, like photos of Janet Jackson sunbathing nekkid and JLo's ex husband bad mouthing her.
Ya know?
Lizzie Spiers is also surprised by Crumbgate.
Dick Morris: How to Beat John Kerry
Say what you will about Francophile Dick Morris, the shady political operator who let a hooker listen in on his private strategy calls with former President Clinton, but you cannot call him incompetent. Today, in The Hill, Morris lays out a strategy whereby the Republicans can defeat that can of hairspray Senator John Kerry (The Corsair wanted John Edwards for the nominee). Morris writes:
"In opting for Sen. John Kerry of Massachusetts and turning down Sen. John Edwards of North Carolina, Democrats have broken from the pragmatism and moderation that dominated their party�s profile under Bill Clinton and Al Gore in the 1990s."
(The Corsair nods, sadly)
"Their party has now moved back to the liberal extremism of Walter Mondale and Michael Dukakis that characterized the 1980s � with the same predictable result."
(The Corsair nods, sadly)
"It is now up to President Bush to take advantage of this by implementing a three-part strategy in the coming campaign.
"First, his paid media must attack Kerry�s voting record to define him as an ultraliberal. There are likely those in the White House who are urging Bush to run positive ads. That won�t work. Even if positive ads produce a small, short-term bounce for Bush, events soon will come to dominate, and the impact of those ads likely will evaporate."
(The Corsair lets out a depressed sigh)
For the other two reasons that will give anyone pause, check out Morris column here.
Say what you will about Francophile Dick Morris, the shady political operator who let a hooker listen in on his private strategy calls with former President Clinton, but you cannot call him incompetent. Today, in The Hill, Morris lays out a strategy whereby the Republicans can defeat that can of hairspray Senator John Kerry (The Corsair wanted John Edwards for the nominee). Morris writes:
"In opting for Sen. John Kerry of Massachusetts and turning down Sen. John Edwards of North Carolina, Democrats have broken from the pragmatism and moderation that dominated their party�s profile under Bill Clinton and Al Gore in the 1990s."
(The Corsair nods, sadly)
"Their party has now moved back to the liberal extremism of Walter Mondale and Michael Dukakis that characterized the 1980s � with the same predictable result."
(The Corsair nods, sadly)
"It is now up to President Bush to take advantage of this by implementing a three-part strategy in the coming campaign.
"First, his paid media must attack Kerry�s voting record to define him as an ultraliberal. There are likely those in the White House who are urging Bush to run positive ads. That won�t work. Even if positive ads produce a small, short-term bounce for Bush, events soon will come to dominate, and the impact of those ads likely will evaporate."
(The Corsair lets out a depressed sigh)
For the other two reasons that will give anyone pause, check out Morris column here.
JLo's Ex Speaks: And, Damn, does he sound Bitter
That significant cultural artifact Star Magazine gives up the scoop with a bitter interview with JLo's first husband. Doesn't JLo know how to pay off your exes? I mean, arent there lawyers and private investigators in Hollywood who make a living taking care of exes?
Anyhoo: The 29 year old Cuban-born Ojani Noa, a former waiter who married J.Lo in early 1997 is speaking out to The Star's Nicola Pittam & Anna Holmes:
"'While I am very happy, Jennifer does not seem that way,' hunky Noa, who's releasing a calendar of semi-nude photos, declares. 'She has changed so much since I first met her. I'm sure her romance with Ben failed because she changed.'
"'Ben went through the same joys I had with her in the early days,' Noa says. 'It is all incredibly romantic, but then she changes. The more famous she becomes, the more different she is -- I think it happens because of the people she has around her, her team of advisers, managers and lawyers. It happened to me when I was married to her. There were times when even I had to go through advisers to speak to her.'
"Noa says that Jennifer was in major denial about her transformation, however. 'She turned to me [one day] and said, You're not the man I married, he says. 'We'd only been married six months. But I hadn't changed, it was her. All she thought about was her work. It kind of hurt in a way because I was really young and really naive. To be honest, it felt like a betrayal.'"
Check out Star for the rest of the story.
That significant cultural artifact Star Magazine gives up the scoop with a bitter interview with JLo's first husband. Doesn't JLo know how to pay off your exes? I mean, arent there lawyers and private investigators in Hollywood who make a living taking care of exes?
Anyhoo: The 29 year old Cuban-born Ojani Noa, a former waiter who married J.Lo in early 1997 is speaking out to The Star's Nicola Pittam & Anna Holmes:
"'While I am very happy, Jennifer does not seem that way,' hunky Noa, who's releasing a calendar of semi-nude photos, declares. 'She has changed so much since I first met her. I'm sure her romance with Ben failed because she changed.'
"'Ben went through the same joys I had with her in the early days,' Noa says. 'It is all incredibly romantic, but then she changes. The more famous she becomes, the more different she is -- I think it happens because of the people she has around her, her team of advisers, managers and lawyers. It happened to me when I was married to her. There were times when even I had to go through advisers to speak to her.'
"Noa says that Jennifer was in major denial about her transformation, however. 'She turned to me [one day] and said, You're not the man I married, he says. 'We'd only been married six months. But I hadn't changed, it was her. All she thought about was her work. It kind of hurt in a way because I was really young and really naive. To be honest, it felt like a betrayal.'"
Check out Star for the rest of the story.
A Little of the Old In and Out
In:
Happy Birthday, Eddie Grant. You know Eddie. He was that affable 80s reggae singer who made "Electric Avenue." Well, today he turns 56. "And then we'll take it higher."
Out:
Ultraphony asshole Jim Carrey is definitely out. The National Enquirer's Robin Mizrahi paints a gloomy picture of the fake. She writes:
"'Jim (Carey) knows he's great at becoming other characters, but he feels he has no true soul of his own,' a close friend confided to The ENQUIRER.
"The twice-divorced performer also feels frustrated at not having found the right woman, but he doesn't think he'll find his soul mate until he first discovers his own true self, said the friend. And right now the spiritual pilgrim is practicing what he preaches.
"'Jim eats no wheat, dairy, sugar or processed food. No caffeine, either, and he doesn't smoke cigarettes or pot. And he's really into fasting - he actually enjoys feeling hungry,' revealed his friend.
"'Jim never does anything halfway. Even his house reflects his new philosophy - he's been giving away his possessions, little by little.'"
This, people, is the same Spiritual pilgrim who emerged from a rhino's ass.
In:
Minerals and herbs. Roger Friedman of Foxnews.com says of Jacko:
"When Jackson thought he was having a morphine overdose last December, I am told he called in one Alfredo Bowman, also known as 'Dr. Sebi.' Bowman is not a real doctor. He just plays one.
"Bowman ... is now staying with Michael in Aspen, feeding him minerals and herbs and talking to him very nicely. US Weekly says Dr. Sebi is 'detoxing' Michael from his addiction to alcohol and painkillers. " Hmmm. Minerals and herbs.
In:
Steroids. Lloyd Grove once again gives us the Sweet and Lowdown today. Interviewing extreme journalist Robert Young Pelton, just back from the Afghanistan-Pakistan border, who interviewed a CIA operative known pnly as "The Contractor." The Contractor says about combat readiniess:
"Most (CIA operatives) are into steroids big-time. D-balls [Dianabol] to bulk you up and Sustanon to help you maintain what you gained. The doctors turn a blind eye to it. We get the stuff across the border in Pakistan."
What the fuck?
Out:
Nerds. The geek shall inherit the earth. NY Times Martin Nisenholtz insists that although he knows things tech, he is not a geek.
In:
Arianna Huffington. The new in thing in Washington is to succeed in Hollywood. HBO's K-Street, Lawrence O'Donnell and Dede Myers consulting for NBC's The West Wing, and now Arianna Huffington, parlaying her run for Governor into political tv. Rush and Molloy write:
"Halle Berry and Alfre Woodard may be dueling it out on rival movies based on an incident in Tulia, Tex. Berry wants to play a defense lawyer for some of the 10% of the town's black residents who were falsely arrested on drug charges in 1999 on the word of a single cop. But 'Tulia' is still two years away. Meanwhile, producers Arianna Huffington and David Yudain have their own movie, 'Tulia, Texas,' ready to go for CBS, in which Woodard would star as Mattie White, whose four children were all arrested." I'm so there.
In:
Excess. From Page Six: "BEN Stiller washing his $41 hamburger down with a glass of Dom Perignon at Old Homestead." Damn, all I had was a bite of Bonnie Fuller's crummy sandwich for lunch.
Out:
Adam Clayton Powell, Jr. versus Charles Rangel. Page Six writes, "THAT State Assemblyman Adam Clayton Powell Jr. � one of the few Democratic legislators who spoke against the state's harsh ban on smoking and voted against the bill � held a fund-raiser last night at One on Little West 12th Street for his campaign against Rep. Charles Rangel, who won his Harlem congressional seat from Powell's father in 1970." Fuck. When are we Northerners going to figure out that the reason the South is so powerful is that they fall in line and reelect representatives for the long haul, thus garnering seniority, and thus helping the region. Rangel is fourth in line to head Ways and Means and is steering a lot of pork to Harlem. Electing Powell simply because he wants to avenge his pappy s no help to Harlem. And Al Sharpton insinuating himself into this mess and backing Powell because he felt Rangel slapped him in the face by endorsing Wes Clark doesn't help matters. Sheesh, Washington politics is as complicated as my last name.
In:
Happy Birthday, Eddie Grant. You know Eddie. He was that affable 80s reggae singer who made "Electric Avenue." Well, today he turns 56. "And then we'll take it higher."
Out:
Ultraphony asshole Jim Carrey is definitely out. The National Enquirer's Robin Mizrahi paints a gloomy picture of the fake. She writes:
"'Jim (Carey) knows he's great at becoming other characters, but he feels he has no true soul of his own,' a close friend confided to The ENQUIRER.
"The twice-divorced performer also feels frustrated at not having found the right woman, but he doesn't think he'll find his soul mate until he first discovers his own true self, said the friend. And right now the spiritual pilgrim is practicing what he preaches.
"'Jim eats no wheat, dairy, sugar or processed food. No caffeine, either, and he doesn't smoke cigarettes or pot. And he's really into fasting - he actually enjoys feeling hungry,' revealed his friend.
"'Jim never does anything halfway. Even his house reflects his new philosophy - he's been giving away his possessions, little by little.'"
This, people, is the same Spiritual pilgrim who emerged from a rhino's ass.
In:
Minerals and herbs. Roger Friedman of Foxnews.com says of Jacko:
"When Jackson thought he was having a morphine overdose last December, I am told he called in one Alfredo Bowman, also known as 'Dr. Sebi.' Bowman is not a real doctor. He just plays one.
"Bowman ... is now staying with Michael in Aspen, feeding him minerals and herbs and talking to him very nicely. US Weekly says Dr. Sebi is 'detoxing' Michael from his addiction to alcohol and painkillers. " Hmmm. Minerals and herbs.
In:
Steroids. Lloyd Grove once again gives us the Sweet and Lowdown today. Interviewing extreme journalist Robert Young Pelton, just back from the Afghanistan-Pakistan border, who interviewed a CIA operative known pnly as "The Contractor." The Contractor says about combat readiniess:
"Most (CIA operatives) are into steroids big-time. D-balls [Dianabol] to bulk you up and Sustanon to help you maintain what you gained. The doctors turn a blind eye to it. We get the stuff across the border in Pakistan."
What the fuck?
Out:
Nerds. The geek shall inherit the earth. NY Times Martin Nisenholtz insists that although he knows things tech, he is not a geek.
In:
Arianna Huffington. The new in thing in Washington is to succeed in Hollywood. HBO's K-Street, Lawrence O'Donnell and Dede Myers consulting for NBC's The West Wing, and now Arianna Huffington, parlaying her run for Governor into political tv. Rush and Molloy write:
"Halle Berry and Alfre Woodard may be dueling it out on rival movies based on an incident in Tulia, Tex. Berry wants to play a defense lawyer for some of the 10% of the town's black residents who were falsely arrested on drug charges in 1999 on the word of a single cop. But 'Tulia' is still two years away. Meanwhile, producers Arianna Huffington and David Yudain have their own movie, 'Tulia, Texas,' ready to go for CBS, in which Woodard would star as Mattie White, whose four children were all arrested." I'm so there.
In:
Excess. From Page Six: "BEN Stiller washing his $41 hamburger down with a glass of Dom Perignon at Old Homestead." Damn, all I had was a bite of Bonnie Fuller's crummy sandwich for lunch.
Out:
Adam Clayton Powell, Jr. versus Charles Rangel. Page Six writes, "THAT State Assemblyman Adam Clayton Powell Jr. � one of the few Democratic legislators who spoke against the state's harsh ban on smoking and voted against the bill � held a fund-raiser last night at One on Little West 12th Street for his campaign against Rep. Charles Rangel, who won his Harlem congressional seat from Powell's father in 1970." Fuck. When are we Northerners going to figure out that the reason the South is so powerful is that they fall in line and reelect representatives for the long haul, thus garnering seniority, and thus helping the region. Rangel is fourth in line to head Ways and Means and is steering a lot of pork to Harlem. Electing Powell simply because he wants to avenge his pappy s no help to Harlem. And Al Sharpton insinuating himself into this mess and backing Powell because he felt Rangel slapped him in the face by endorsing Wes Clark doesn't help matters. Sheesh, Washington politics is as complicated as my last name.
New York Times Crystal Ball: Media Consolidation in 2004
The New York Times' Business Editor Larry Ingrassia was interviewed for Media Life Magazine and this chestnut dropped when asked what he thought the media story for 2004 might be:
"Media consolidation in broadcast television and cable, in entertainment, and how that plays out. You see it in the effort by Comcast to acquire Disney.
"There�s consolidation going on. How that proceeds and the extent to which it affects consumers of entertainment, news and information is a hugely important story."
The New York Times' Business Editor Larry Ingrassia was interviewed for Media Life Magazine and this chestnut dropped when asked what he thought the media story for 2004 might be:
"Media consolidation in broadcast television and cable, in entertainment, and how that plays out. You see it in the effort by Comcast to acquire Disney.
"There�s consolidation going on. How that proceeds and the extent to which it affects consumers of entertainment, news and information is a hugely important story."
Thursday, March 04, 2004
A Little of the Old In and Out
In:
David Chappelle. Fuck, Dave is so in with The Corsair that I am about to name him the new Richard Pryor based solely on the "I'm Rick James, Bitch!" skit, easily some of the best comedy of the past decade. And I'm not alone in the praise. According to medialifemagazine.com, " 'South Park' has long been the MVP of Comedy Central, hauling whatever show airs after it to decent ratings.
"But now it looks like one of those shows finally has detached itself from 'Park's' coattails, to the point that it is now bettering its lead-in's ratings.
"Comedy Central's 'Chappelle's Show' starring Dave Chappelle had a strong week and helped boost the network to an even stronger February, up 10 percent over the previous month among adults 18-49.
"'Chappelle,' which airs Wednesday at 10:30 p.m., was responsible for a good part of that. Last week's episode made the top 10 on ad-supported cable among viewers 18-49 years old. With more than 1.9 million viewers in the group, it was the most-viewed episode since the show's Jan. 21 season premiere."
Out:
Skull and Bones. And I thought only African-Americans devised complicated secret handshakes to crafted to intimidate the uninitiated. But we are all "the man" to Bonesmen. Lloyd Grove gives us the Sweet and Lowdown:
"On the Feb. 8 installment of 'Meet the Press,' the President was similarly uncommunicative (ed note: about Skull and Bones).
"'It's so secret we can't talk about it,' he told Russert.
"'What does that mean for America?' Russert pressed. 'The conspiracy theorists are going to go wild.'
"'I'm sure they are,' Bush agreed with a nervous giggle."
The Corsair nervously giggles.
In:
Former Maine Senator, George Mitchell, the new "nonexecutive chairman" of Disney -- whatever that means. Mitchell is like Rob Lowe when it comes to jobs. He was Clinton's broker for the Irish Good Friday Agreement, a lawyer, an army intelligence officer, a Senate Majority leader and now this. Crazy like Swayze.
Out:
Madonna's panties. Jeannette Walls of MSNBC writes: "Madonna�s skivvies are up for sale. The lacy drawers that the singer wore in 'Evita' can be purchased for a mere $3,650 from Infinitely Better, a shop in Swindon, England." Greeeat. Madonna's bloomers, anyone ... Drawers? (frustrated) Kni...kni ... Knickers no, not ni -- I am not a racist, in fact I am black ... (sighs) anyone want these things? No? I kinda figured.
In:
Billionaire children's book writer JK Rowling. In an web chat interview to mark World Book Day she hinted she might write a beyond the seven promised Harry Potter books, "(Rowling) was asked: 'Are you going to write books about Harry after school?'
"Rowling gave fans hope when she replied: 'Probably not. But I'll never say never because every time I do I immediately break the vow.'"
Out:
Joe Francis. On Howard Stern today, Snoop Dogg painted a rather sordid picture indeed of the sleazy founder of the Girls Gone Wild franchise (if it is possible to make the purveyor of underage white girls topless seem sleazier), according to Marksfriggin.com:
"Howard and Robin asked Snoop about his new video series 'Black Girls gone Buck Wild' that's with the Playboy people. Snoop said that the guy at Girls Gone Wild didn't want to have Latino and Black girls in his videos so he went out on his own to put out that stuff." Greeeat. Francis was going after that lucrative Kentucky white supremacist market.
In:
18 year old dancers, my friend (savors the words, a smile plays on The Corsair's lips) ... 18-year old dancers. They are crafty the way they get you to buy them things. The Smokinggunners write of Diane Ritchie, who is seriously threatening to part Lionel from his Commodore stash:
"The Richies, who wed in December 1996 and have two young children, live in a $40 million Beverly Hills mansion, with its 30 rooms spread over 18,000 square feet. 'In addition to nine full time staff members, we also employ people to maintain our plants, detail our cars, care for our pool, groom our dog, maintain our aquarium and a painter for regular touch ups on the house,' noted Richie. She also made sure to point out particular monthly expenses that Lionel, 54, needs to cover: clothing, shoes, and accessories ($15,000); dermatology ($3000); laser hair removal ($1000); massages ($600); jewelry ($5000); gifts ($5000); and vitamins ($500). There are plenty of other costs Richie listed--like $20,000 annually for plastic surgery and her nine-year-old son's $125,000 boarding school tuition--but TSG will let you discover those chestnuts. According to Richie, she began dating the pop star in 1984, when they met at the Summer Olympics in Los Angeles (she was an 18-year-old dancer)." I love that last line, an aside, tossed out into the ethers, as if to explain everything (sotto vocce) "she was an 18-year old dancer." A ballerina girl, if you will.
Out:
College athletics. Call me a nerd, my little pomegranates, but I went to college for a classical liberal arts education, not to shoot hoops or rape. Well, the University of Georgia joins the ranks of other corrupt univeristy athletics departments spanning the nation from sea to shining sea. As the Smokinggunners write:
"Until his resignation last year amidst allegations of impropriety in UGA's basketball program, Harrick was an assistant coach under his father, Jim Harrick. In addition to helping pop run the lay-up line, the younger Harrick taught 'Coaching Principles and Strategies in Basketball' during 2001's fall semester. The 39-student class was popular with several of Harrick's players, since the coach wasn't a stickler when it came to attendance, studying, or showing up for the College of Education course's only test. Below you'll find that test, a 20-question mockery that includes such brain teasers as, 'How many points does a 3-point field goal account for in a Basketball Game?'"
Fuck. Silly me for studying Oedipus at Colonus.
In:
David Chappelle. Fuck, Dave is so in with The Corsair that I am about to name him the new Richard Pryor based solely on the "I'm Rick James, Bitch!" skit, easily some of the best comedy of the past decade. And I'm not alone in the praise. According to medialifemagazine.com, " 'South Park' has long been the MVP of Comedy Central, hauling whatever show airs after it to decent ratings.
"But now it looks like one of those shows finally has detached itself from 'Park's' coattails, to the point that it is now bettering its lead-in's ratings.
"Comedy Central's 'Chappelle's Show' starring Dave Chappelle had a strong week and helped boost the network to an even stronger February, up 10 percent over the previous month among adults 18-49.
"'Chappelle,' which airs Wednesday at 10:30 p.m., was responsible for a good part of that. Last week's episode made the top 10 on ad-supported cable among viewers 18-49 years old. With more than 1.9 million viewers in the group, it was the most-viewed episode since the show's Jan. 21 season premiere."
Out:
Skull and Bones. And I thought only African-Americans devised complicated secret handshakes to crafted to intimidate the uninitiated. But we are all "the man" to Bonesmen. Lloyd Grove gives us the Sweet and Lowdown:
"On the Feb. 8 installment of 'Meet the Press,' the President was similarly uncommunicative (ed note: about Skull and Bones).
"'It's so secret we can't talk about it,' he told Russert.
"'What does that mean for America?' Russert pressed. 'The conspiracy theorists are going to go wild.'
"'I'm sure they are,' Bush agreed with a nervous giggle."
The Corsair nervously giggles.
In:
Former Maine Senator, George Mitchell, the new "nonexecutive chairman" of Disney -- whatever that means. Mitchell is like Rob Lowe when it comes to jobs. He was Clinton's broker for the Irish Good Friday Agreement, a lawyer, an army intelligence officer, a Senate Majority leader and now this. Crazy like Swayze.
Out:
Madonna's panties. Jeannette Walls of MSNBC writes: "Madonna�s skivvies are up for sale. The lacy drawers that the singer wore in 'Evita' can be purchased for a mere $3,650 from Infinitely Better, a shop in Swindon, England." Greeeat. Madonna's bloomers, anyone ... Drawers? (frustrated) Kni...kni ... Knickers no, not ni -- I am not a racist, in fact I am black ... (sighs) anyone want these things? No? I kinda figured.
In:
Billionaire children's book writer JK Rowling. In an web chat interview to mark World Book Day she hinted she might write a beyond the seven promised Harry Potter books, "(Rowling) was asked: 'Are you going to write books about Harry after school?'
"Rowling gave fans hope when she replied: 'Probably not. But I'll never say never because every time I do I immediately break the vow.'"
Out:
Joe Francis. On Howard Stern today, Snoop Dogg painted a rather sordid picture indeed of the sleazy founder of the Girls Gone Wild franchise (if it is possible to make the purveyor of underage white girls topless seem sleazier), according to Marksfriggin.com:
"Howard and Robin asked Snoop about his new video series 'Black Girls gone Buck Wild' that's with the Playboy people. Snoop said that the guy at Girls Gone Wild didn't want to have Latino and Black girls in his videos so he went out on his own to put out that stuff." Greeeat. Francis was going after that lucrative Kentucky white supremacist market.
In:
18 year old dancers, my friend (savors the words, a smile plays on The Corsair's lips) ... 18-year old dancers. They are crafty the way they get you to buy them things. The Smokinggunners write of Diane Ritchie, who is seriously threatening to part Lionel from his Commodore stash:
"The Richies, who wed in December 1996 and have two young children, live in a $40 million Beverly Hills mansion, with its 30 rooms spread over 18,000 square feet. 'In addition to nine full time staff members, we also employ people to maintain our plants, detail our cars, care for our pool, groom our dog, maintain our aquarium and a painter for regular touch ups on the house,' noted Richie. She also made sure to point out particular monthly expenses that Lionel, 54, needs to cover: clothing, shoes, and accessories ($15,000); dermatology ($3000); laser hair removal ($1000); massages ($600); jewelry ($5000); gifts ($5000); and vitamins ($500). There are plenty of other costs Richie listed--like $20,000 annually for plastic surgery and her nine-year-old son's $125,000 boarding school tuition--but TSG will let you discover those chestnuts. According to Richie, she began dating the pop star in 1984, when they met at the Summer Olympics in Los Angeles (she was an 18-year-old dancer)." I love that last line, an aside, tossed out into the ethers, as if to explain everything (sotto vocce) "she was an 18-year old dancer." A ballerina girl, if you will.
Out:
College athletics. Call me a nerd, my little pomegranates, but I went to college for a classical liberal arts education, not to shoot hoops or rape. Well, the University of Georgia joins the ranks of other corrupt univeristy athletics departments spanning the nation from sea to shining sea. As the Smokinggunners write:
"Until his resignation last year amidst allegations of impropriety in UGA's basketball program, Harrick was an assistant coach under his father, Jim Harrick. In addition to helping pop run the lay-up line, the younger Harrick taught 'Coaching Principles and Strategies in Basketball' during 2001's fall semester. The 39-student class was popular with several of Harrick's players, since the coach wasn't a stickler when it came to attendance, studying, or showing up for the College of Education course's only test. Below you'll find that test, a 20-question mockery that includes such brain teasers as, 'How many points does a 3-point field goal account for in a Basketball Game?'"
Fuck. Silly me for studying Oedipus at Colonus.
Who Is Novak's Source?
K Street is heating up once again as the election year approaches, as well it should. America is the last standing superpower in the world, and K Street, DC, is the center of that power. Editor and Publisher notes that Robert Novak's source will be named in the new autobiography of former Ambassador Joseph Wilson:
"Sources say the embargoed title, The Politics of Truth, from Carroll & Graf, will reveal who tipped off syndicated columnist Robert Novak in July that Wilson's wife, Valerie Plame, worked for the CIA--a felony punishable by as many as ten years in prison--and the larger circumstances around the leak. The matter is the subject of a grand-jury investigation that has seen Novak, Wilson and a number of high-profile administration members questioned."
Also in K Street news, the question as to who will replace Jack Valenti is up in the air.
The ultra sleazy Washington lobbyist and MPAA head Jack V took a bit of an ass whipping at the hands of Federal Judge Michael B. Mukasey in New York recently.
Citing "unlawful restraint of trade," that the MPAA's "screener ban" would significantly harm independent films, Mukasey granted a preliminary injunction, effective immediately, blocking the policy.
Falling back on the old chesnut that screeners are major sources of piracy, we won't entertain the possibility that old Jack is trying to protect the Oscar from deserving independent films, who have cleaned the clocks of the tired, formulaic old studios.
In other news, Louisiana Congressman Billy Tauzin dropped out of the running, and gave up his top contender position of taking over from Valenti. Why would a powerful Republican in the majority party even want to become head of the embattled MPAA?
Well, the $1.03 million salary might be incentive. How about that sweet screening room at MPAA's Washington headquarters (perhaps third in coolness behind the White House screening room and Steven Spielberg's), then there are the orchestra seats at the Oscars, the limosine and driver, the office two blocks away from the White House, and first class travel to film festivals.
Ah, the line between K Street and, er, uhm, K Street is blurred.
The Hill notes two superhighpowered contenders for Valenti's job:
"One is 12th-term Rep. David Dreier (R-Calif.), the chairman of the Rules Committee who headed the successful gubernatorial campaign of movie star Arnold Schwarzenegger and has been romantically linked to several movie actresses.
"The other is even better known: White House National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice, who perhaps not so coincidentally was given a warm introduction at a Valentine�s Day party last month hosted by Bill Cohen, the former defense secretary and Republican senator from Maine."
God, I wish K Street were still on.
Finally, at the highest levels of power, it is no secret that Bush never forgave McCain for challenging him in the primary in 2000, became the media darling of the race, and made him spend some of his oil stained campaign booty in said primary. Well, the two are at it again, just like South Carolina, according to The Hill. Bush, attempting to be seen as even handed on the independent commission on intelligence, appointed McCain chair. Bad move, writes Alexander Bolton:
"Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) is pushing the White House to give subpoena power to the independent commission President Bush created last month to investigate intelligence operations.
"The administration has turned him down, but the senator is refusing to take no for an answer.
"The clash reignites a bitterness first sparked when Bush and McCain fought for the GOP presidential nomination in 2000."
Reignites? It never simmered down, dude.
K Street is heating up once again as the election year approaches, as well it should. America is the last standing superpower in the world, and K Street, DC, is the center of that power. Editor and Publisher notes that Robert Novak's source will be named in the new autobiography of former Ambassador Joseph Wilson:
"Sources say the embargoed title, The Politics of Truth, from Carroll & Graf, will reveal who tipped off syndicated columnist Robert Novak in July that Wilson's wife, Valerie Plame, worked for the CIA--a felony punishable by as many as ten years in prison--and the larger circumstances around the leak. The matter is the subject of a grand-jury investigation that has seen Novak, Wilson and a number of high-profile administration members questioned."
Also in K Street news, the question as to who will replace Jack Valenti is up in the air.
The ultra sleazy Washington lobbyist and MPAA head Jack V took a bit of an ass whipping at the hands of Federal Judge Michael B. Mukasey in New York recently.
Citing "unlawful restraint of trade," that the MPAA's "screener ban" would significantly harm independent films, Mukasey granted a preliminary injunction, effective immediately, blocking the policy.
Falling back on the old chesnut that screeners are major sources of piracy, we won't entertain the possibility that old Jack is trying to protect the Oscar from deserving independent films, who have cleaned the clocks of the tired, formulaic old studios.
In other news, Louisiana Congressman Billy Tauzin dropped out of the running, and gave up his top contender position of taking over from Valenti. Why would a powerful Republican in the majority party even want to become head of the embattled MPAA?
Well, the $1.03 million salary might be incentive. How about that sweet screening room at MPAA's Washington headquarters (perhaps third in coolness behind the White House screening room and Steven Spielberg's), then there are the orchestra seats at the Oscars, the limosine and driver, the office two blocks away from the White House, and first class travel to film festivals.
Ah, the line between K Street and, er, uhm, K Street is blurred.
The Hill notes two superhighpowered contenders for Valenti's job:
"One is 12th-term Rep. David Dreier (R-Calif.), the chairman of the Rules Committee who headed the successful gubernatorial campaign of movie star Arnold Schwarzenegger and has been romantically linked to several movie actresses.
"The other is even better known: White House National Security Adviser Condoleezza Rice, who perhaps not so coincidentally was given a warm introduction at a Valentine�s Day party last month hosted by Bill Cohen, the former defense secretary and Republican senator from Maine."
God, I wish K Street were still on.
Finally, at the highest levels of power, it is no secret that Bush never forgave McCain for challenging him in the primary in 2000, became the media darling of the race, and made him spend some of his oil stained campaign booty in said primary. Well, the two are at it again, just like South Carolina, according to The Hill. Bush, attempting to be seen as even handed on the independent commission on intelligence, appointed McCain chair. Bad move, writes Alexander Bolton:
"Sen. John McCain (R-Ariz.) is pushing the White House to give subpoena power to the independent commission President Bush created last month to investigate intelligence operations.
"The administration has turned him down, but the senator is refusing to take no for an answer.
"The clash reignites a bitterness first sparked when Bush and McCain fought for the GOP presidential nomination in 2000."
Reignites? It never simmered down, dude.
John Kerry's Manhood
As if to make up for that whole lack of National Security street cred, the backers of the Democrats (Jann Wenner in that infamous Rolling Stone cover of Al Gore) try to insinuate that the nominee has a massive shlong. John Kerry is no different (link via Fleshbot via Wonkette). They may not belive in the death penalty or military bases in every congressional district, but they have three legs.
As if to make up for that whole lack of National Security street cred, the backers of the Democrats (Jann Wenner in that infamous Rolling Stone cover of Al Gore) try to insinuate that the nominee has a massive shlong. John Kerry is no different (link via Fleshbot via Wonkette). They may not belive in the death penalty or military bases in every congressional district, but they have three legs.
John Kerry's Manhood
As if to make up for that whole lack of National Security street cred, the backers of the Democrats (Jann Wenner in that infamous Rolling Stone cover of Al Gore) try to insinuate that the nominee has a massive shlong. John Kerry is no different (link via Fleshbot via Wonkette). They may not belive in the death penalty or military bases in every congressional district, but they have three legs.
As if to make up for that whole lack of National Security street cred, the backers of the Democrats (Jann Wenner in that infamous Rolling Stone cover of Al Gore) try to insinuate that the nominee has a massive shlong. John Kerry is no different (link via Fleshbot via Wonkette). They may not belive in the death penalty or military bases in every congressional district, but they have three legs.
Tina on Nader
"There was something perversely thrilling about the old Raider's decision not to do the decent thing and lie low (or even help the side he claims to be on)," writes Tina Brown in the Washington Post. "In an era when every politician's naked ego is muffled by euphemism, his bloody-minded announcement was the political version of unprotected sex. He is willing to trash his legacy to make a point about process."
And then she delivers the coup de grace, like a jailhouse shiv between the ribs: "Crazy alpha-men in their waning years have a miserable time out of the limelight."
Rarely do we agree with Tina, but that is so true.
"There was something perversely thrilling about the old Raider's decision not to do the decent thing and lie low (or even help the side he claims to be on)," writes Tina Brown in the Washington Post. "In an era when every politician's naked ego is muffled by euphemism, his bloody-minded announcement was the political version of unprotected sex. He is willing to trash his legacy to make a point about process."
And then she delivers the coup de grace, like a jailhouse shiv between the ribs: "Crazy alpha-men in their waning years have a miserable time out of the limelight."
Rarely do we agree with Tina, but that is so true.
Tuesday, March 02, 2004
Oscar Night Romps
Those intrepid 3AM Girls got the goods on the after-after Oscar party(wink-wink), you know, the parties that begin in private rooms at the Chateau Marmont after the drinks at Morton's makes everyone a little frisky.
Apparently, Benicio del Toro, whose name, the 3AM Girls freely translate to mean, "Benny the Bull," was seen canoodling with the Lost in Translation star with the sexiest ass The Corsair believes he has ever seen:
"Our spies caught the pair walking into the exclusive Chateau Marmont hotel on Sunset Boulevard at 3.30am with their arms wrapped around each other before getting into a lift to go somewhere a little more intimate.
"'They didn't care who saw them,' says our source. 'They walked through the hotel lobby where there were quite a few people hanging about and didn't seem at all embarrassed to be spotted with their arms all over each other."
The Corsair munches on salt-free popcorn and leans into his screen.
"'It was quite extraordinary. She looks so young and he could easily pass for her dad.
"'They then got into a lift together. At that time in the morning they couldn't have been heading to the hotel pool, put it like that. They were clearly going to the rooms.
"'You would have thought they'd want their beauty sleep as the ceremony took place later that afternoon, but clearly not.' Puerto Rican Benicio, 37, apparently likes his ladies young.
"The sexy actor once smooched with British supermodel Sophie Dahl at a New York club when she wasn't much older than his newest squeeze."
Page Six Reports:
"Naomi Campbell was making the rounds at Mortons with music mogul Steve Stoute, but word was out that she and 'Rush Hour' director Brett Ratner are an item � perhaps be cause they were spotted coming out of the Beverly Hills Hotel the other day around noon."
Ah, l'amour.
Also: The 3AM Girls noted, in a side blind item:
"WHICH showbiz bash host instructed door staff to confiscate mobile phones with cameras? He was so worried compromising piccies would get out he refused entry to anyone who wouldn't give their handsets in."
Smart idea, but the enemy of bloggers. Was that Graydon Carter by any chance?
And: Lizzie Spiers' Oscar Night Bonfire of the Vanities.
And: The great Michael Musto sums up The Oscars.
Thanks for the link Uncle Grambo!
(Due to a heavy workload there will not be a blog tommorrow. Sorry for being sporadic, guys:( )
Those intrepid 3AM Girls got the goods on the after-after Oscar party(wink-wink), you know, the parties that begin in private rooms at the Chateau Marmont after the drinks at Morton's makes everyone a little frisky.
Apparently, Benicio del Toro, whose name, the 3AM Girls freely translate to mean, "Benny the Bull," was seen canoodling with the Lost in Translation star with the sexiest ass The Corsair believes he has ever seen:
"Our spies caught the pair walking into the exclusive Chateau Marmont hotel on Sunset Boulevard at 3.30am with their arms wrapped around each other before getting into a lift to go somewhere a little more intimate.
"'They didn't care who saw them,' says our source. 'They walked through the hotel lobby where there were quite a few people hanging about and didn't seem at all embarrassed to be spotted with their arms all over each other."
The Corsair munches on salt-free popcorn and leans into his screen.
"'It was quite extraordinary. She looks so young and he could easily pass for her dad.
"'They then got into a lift together. At that time in the morning they couldn't have been heading to the hotel pool, put it like that. They were clearly going to the rooms.
"'You would have thought they'd want their beauty sleep as the ceremony took place later that afternoon, but clearly not.' Puerto Rican Benicio, 37, apparently likes his ladies young.
"The sexy actor once smooched with British supermodel Sophie Dahl at a New York club when she wasn't much older than his newest squeeze."
Page Six Reports:
"Naomi Campbell was making the rounds at Mortons with music mogul Steve Stoute, but word was out that she and 'Rush Hour' director Brett Ratner are an item � perhaps be cause they were spotted coming out of the Beverly Hills Hotel the other day around noon."
Ah, l'amour.
Also: The 3AM Girls noted, in a side blind item:
"WHICH showbiz bash host instructed door staff to confiscate mobile phones with cameras? He was so worried compromising piccies would get out he refused entry to anyone who wouldn't give their handsets in."
Smart idea, but the enemy of bloggers. Was that Graydon Carter by any chance?
And: Lizzie Spiers' Oscar Night Bonfire of the Vanities.
And: The great Michael Musto sums up The Oscars.
Thanks for the link Uncle Grambo!
(Due to a heavy workload there will not be a blog tommorrow. Sorry for being sporadic, guys:( )
Dasani Bottled Water is Tap Water
In the beginning was the Jesus Juice, now The BBC reports that Coca Cola's experiment in bottled water, Dasani, the second biggest selling bottled water in the US, is actually nothing more than "purified" tap water. The Beeb reports:
"Soft drink giant Coca-Cola has admitted it is selling purified tap water in a bottle.
It says the source for its new Dasani bottled water is the mains supply at its factory in Kent.
"The company says Dasani is 'as pure as bottled water gets' due to a 'highly sophisticated purification process'."
And you thought Evian spelled backwards was naive?
Just so long as no one messes with my Fiji water. That's my joint right there, straight or as a splash in my Cutty Sark. To paraphrase Ellen Rucker Carter, "FIJI is the truth!!!"
In the beginning was the Jesus Juice, now The BBC reports that Coca Cola's experiment in bottled water, Dasani, the second biggest selling bottled water in the US, is actually nothing more than "purified" tap water. The Beeb reports:
"Soft drink giant Coca-Cola has admitted it is selling purified tap water in a bottle.
It says the source for its new Dasani bottled water is the mains supply at its factory in Kent.
"The company says Dasani is 'as pure as bottled water gets' due to a 'highly sophisticated purification process'."
And you thought Evian spelled backwards was naive?
Just so long as no one messes with my Fiji water. That's my joint right there, straight or as a splash in my Cutty Sark. To paraphrase Ellen Rucker Carter, "FIJI is the truth!!!"
A Little of the Old In and Out
In:
"Rob Lowe will play the lead role in the CBS drama series 'Dr. Vegas,' as the doctor at a hotel in, you guessed it, Vegas," reports Media Life. In the recent past Lowe has been employed as a Presidential speechwriter who leaves his job to run for Congress, a lawyer and now a doctor. We never would have guessed that the sax playing, hard boozing and partying Billy Hixx from St. Elmo's Fire would be such a yuppie professional with so many careers. He's a Man In Motion.
Out:
M & M's. Melts in your mouth not in your hands, righ? Wrong! As Jeanette Walls of TheScoop writes: "Joan Rivers got into a turf war with the BBC. The caustic funnywoman was broadcasting her fashion critique from the red carpet at the Oscars for E! and kept butting heads and fighting over guests with a reporter for the BBC, says a source.
"'Honestly, the BBC people were being sort of aggressive about grabbing [celebrities] and saying we?re in a live shot and then holding onto them forever,' says a source. 'Or they kept luring over guests who were talking to Joan by offering them M&Ms if they would stop talking to Joan and come over to talk to them. Joan and the BBC were bickering over Nicole Kidman for example. Joan was joking about it all, but it actually got pretty ugly at a few points.'"
In:
Hookers as a Vehicle to Win the Best Actress Oscar Ted Casablancas of E! Entertainment -- easily the shallowest television channel -- makes a fascinating point by way of telling us that Tom Cruise and Penelope Cruz broke up. He says:
"More reliable is the notion that chicks in Hollywood will forever play chickas for hire--and get Academy Award noms and wins out the wazoo for the privilege. You know the heady list: Elizabeth Taylor, Julia Roberts, Elisabeth Shue, Mira Sorvino, et al.
"Now, didja think I wasn't gonna ask *(Jane Fonda). about Charlize's 'murdering lady of the evening' Oscar nod? (After all, Jane-hon received her own gold playing a hooker in 1971's Klute.) She diplomatically said to moi, specifically in regard to Charlize, 'The Academy sees that it's a complex role to portray a woman who wasn't born a monster.'"
Out:
Split personalities. Apparently, Beyonce Knowles needs to put on a split persona act to get on stage and shake her ample booty, according to The Star. Louise Gannon writes:
"Beyonce says it was a cousin of hers who first noticed that she became an entirely different person onstage.
"'She came up with the name Sasha and it sort of stuck. Now, when I go onstage in one of my outfits, everyone around me calls me Sasha."
"Without Sasha, Beyonce notes, 'you'd get a very different girl. There's no way I'd wear a short little dress [and] dance like that in front of all those people. Beyonce Knowles is really just a very quiet, shy little thing.'"
Great.
In:
"Rob Lowe will play the lead role in the CBS drama series 'Dr. Vegas,' as the doctor at a hotel in, you guessed it, Vegas," reports Media Life. In the recent past Lowe has been employed as a Presidential speechwriter who leaves his job to run for Congress, a lawyer and now a doctor. We never would have guessed that the sax playing, hard boozing and partying Billy Hixx from St. Elmo's Fire would be such a yuppie professional with so many careers. He's a Man In Motion.
Out:
M & M's. Melts in your mouth not in your hands, righ? Wrong! As Jeanette Walls of TheScoop writes: "Joan Rivers got into a turf war with the BBC. The caustic funnywoman was broadcasting her fashion critique from the red carpet at the Oscars for E! and kept butting heads and fighting over guests with a reporter for the BBC, says a source.
"'Honestly, the BBC people were being sort of aggressive about grabbing [celebrities] and saying we?re in a live shot and then holding onto them forever,' says a source. 'Or they kept luring over guests who were talking to Joan by offering them M&Ms if they would stop talking to Joan and come over to talk to them. Joan and the BBC were bickering over Nicole Kidman for example. Joan was joking about it all, but it actually got pretty ugly at a few points.'"
In:
Hookers as a Vehicle to Win the Best Actress Oscar Ted Casablancas of E! Entertainment -- easily the shallowest television channel -- makes a fascinating point by way of telling us that Tom Cruise and Penelope Cruz broke up. He says:
"More reliable is the notion that chicks in Hollywood will forever play chickas for hire--and get Academy Award noms and wins out the wazoo for the privilege. You know the heady list: Elizabeth Taylor, Julia Roberts, Elisabeth Shue, Mira Sorvino, et al.
"Now, didja think I wasn't gonna ask *(Jane Fonda). about Charlize's 'murdering lady of the evening' Oscar nod? (After all, Jane-hon received her own gold playing a hooker in 1971's Klute.) She diplomatically said to moi, specifically in regard to Charlize, 'The Academy sees that it's a complex role to portray a woman who wasn't born a monster.'"
Out:
Split personalities. Apparently, Beyonce Knowles needs to put on a split persona act to get on stage and shake her ample booty, according to The Star. Louise Gannon writes:
"Beyonce says it was a cousin of hers who first noticed that she became an entirely different person onstage.
"'She came up with the name Sasha and it sort of stuck. Now, when I go onstage in one of my outfits, everyone around me calls me Sasha."
"Without Sasha, Beyonce notes, 'you'd get a very different girl. There's no way I'd wear a short little dress [and] dance like that in front of all those people. Beyonce Knowles is really just a very quiet, shy little thing.'"
Great.
Monday, March 01, 2004
Lord of the Voting Academy Members
With over 26,000 cast and crew, many of which are voting Academy members -- costumers, model builders, digital experts, lighting technicians, etc -- it is no wonder LOTR made an incredible 11 out of 11 sweep at the Oscars.
Rush and Molloy quoted Sir Elton John, "It was the most boring Oscars I have ever seen,' he told us at the party he threw with InStyle magazine at Pearl.
"'I thought there might be one surprise in the song category, but even there Lord of the Rings won. And I don't think it deserved to."
Me neither, Elton.
Poor (but wealthy) Harvey Weinstein, who let the film slip through his short fingers, like Melissa Rivers' slender foot busting through her Jimmy Choo last night, must be howling right about now for letting New Line take his lunch money.
I imagine dreamily that he and embattled Disney CEO Michael Eisner -- who took some collateral hits as well -- are somewhere, possibly The Ivy, licking their wounds, counting their lumps, and bonding over the absurdity of it all:
Michael Eisner: Shit, Harv. Bad night all around, huh.
Harvey Weinstein: That's a fucking understatement, Mike.
Eisner: Lotsa noise coming from my end.
Weinstein: (embarrassed) Sorry, Mike, that was me (shoos his backside with a copy of Variety), Damned Wolfgang Puck and his fucking French Perigord black truffles ... too rich.
Eisner: (covering his nose all of a sudden) oh, Harvey ...
Weinstein: Hey, didja see The Lord of the Voting Academy Members sweep?
Eisner: Evil genius, Harv; evil fuckin' genius. That business model reeked of Dark Lord Sauron.
Weinstein: Takes one ta know one (laughs). Imagine sending a cast of 26,000 -- many of whom are Academy members -- to vote in the interest of their resumes. No wonder.
Eisner: I took a beating last night too, Harv, if ya hadn't noticed.
Weinstein: And Finding Nemo should have been spun as a win for Disney. You know you are half way to Ovitzville when Robin Williams of all people is comparing your company to "a Muppet and a water slide."
Eisner: I have a lot of enemies, Harvey, what can I fuckin' say. I'm like an African dictator holding on to power. There are a lot of laid off and bitter animators out there looking to trap the mouse.
Weinstein: Player haters, Mike; they are just playa hatin'.
Eisner: As I always say, don't playa hate, congratulate.
Weinstein: Or in my fuckin' case: don't playa hate, emulate. Next time around Miramax is financing a film with 50,000 Academy voting extras, I'm gonna be throwin my weight around. Bling-blinged freak terrorizes Tinseltown: Wait till they get a loada me!
With over 26,000 cast and crew, many of which are voting Academy members -- costumers, model builders, digital experts, lighting technicians, etc -- it is no wonder LOTR made an incredible 11 out of 11 sweep at the Oscars.
Rush and Molloy quoted Sir Elton John, "It was the most boring Oscars I have ever seen,' he told us at the party he threw with InStyle magazine at Pearl.
"'I thought there might be one surprise in the song category, but even there Lord of the Rings won. And I don't think it deserved to."
Me neither, Elton.
Poor (but wealthy) Harvey Weinstein, who let the film slip through his short fingers, like Melissa Rivers' slender foot busting through her Jimmy Choo last night, must be howling right about now for letting New Line take his lunch money.
I imagine dreamily that he and embattled Disney CEO Michael Eisner -- who took some collateral hits as well -- are somewhere, possibly The Ivy, licking their wounds, counting their lumps, and bonding over the absurdity of it all:
Michael Eisner: Shit, Harv. Bad night all around, huh.
Harvey Weinstein: That's a fucking understatement, Mike.
Eisner: Lotsa noise coming from my end.
Weinstein: (embarrassed) Sorry, Mike, that was me (shoos his backside with a copy of Variety), Damned Wolfgang Puck and his fucking French Perigord black truffles ... too rich.
Eisner: (covering his nose all of a sudden) oh, Harvey ...
Weinstein: Hey, didja see The Lord of the Voting Academy Members sweep?
Eisner: Evil genius, Harv; evil fuckin' genius. That business model reeked of Dark Lord Sauron.
Weinstein: Takes one ta know one (laughs). Imagine sending a cast of 26,000 -- many of whom are Academy members -- to vote in the interest of their resumes. No wonder.
Eisner: I took a beating last night too, Harv, if ya hadn't noticed.
Weinstein: And Finding Nemo should have been spun as a win for Disney. You know you are half way to Ovitzville when Robin Williams of all people is comparing your company to "a Muppet and a water slide."
Eisner: I have a lot of enemies, Harvey, what can I fuckin' say. I'm like an African dictator holding on to power. There are a lot of laid off and bitter animators out there looking to trap the mouse.
Weinstein: Player haters, Mike; they are just playa hatin'.
Eisner: As I always say, don't playa hate, congratulate.
Weinstein: Or in my fuckin' case: don't playa hate, emulate. Next time around Miramax is financing a film with 50,000 Academy voting extras, I'm gonna be throwin my weight around. Bling-blinged freak terrorizes Tinseltown: Wait till they get a loada me!
President Howard Stern?
Howard Stern mentioned this morning that he may consider running for President.
Of course he will not, ultimately, for several reasons, some of which are:
1) He will not reveal his current salary and IRS forms to the press, for fear that Thesmokinggun.com would pummel him.
2) He is past his prime and will not -- even if he registers new people to vote -- break 5 percent.
3) He would probably -- if he ran -- help reelect Bush, which is, for him, a nightmarish FCC scenario.
4) It would fuck up his ABC TV Barbara Walteresque deal, which begins in the spring, on a limited basis.
Instead of running for President, Stern should (and could) broker a deal --shnell! -- with Senator John Edwards for an endorsement before the Super Tuesday primary. Stern could give Edwards his endorsement -- in the best of all possible worlds --if the Senator promised to run to reform the FCC, for the better. This would have to be done on the morning show tommorrow in time to make a difference in the Super Tuesday primary. Time is of the essence here.
Other than that, Nader could possibly swoop in and make the promise and get the Stern endorsement (*recoils in horror*).
There is no doubt that this election will be one part economy, and one part cultural, with Stern on the one side, and Mel Gibson on the other, representing the twin polarities of our democractic life. Bush congenitally plays the culture card when the economy tanks, just like his daddy and the "Flag desecration" amendment.
Note to John Edwards: Make this happen.
Howard Stern mentioned this morning that he may consider running for President.
Of course he will not, ultimately, for several reasons, some of which are:
1) He will not reveal his current salary and IRS forms to the press, for fear that Thesmokinggun.com would pummel him.
2) He is past his prime and will not -- even if he registers new people to vote -- break 5 percent.
3) He would probably -- if he ran -- help reelect Bush, which is, for him, a nightmarish FCC scenario.
4) It would fuck up his ABC TV Barbara Walteresque deal, which begins in the spring, on a limited basis.
Instead of running for President, Stern should (and could) broker a deal --shnell! -- with Senator John Edwards for an endorsement before the Super Tuesday primary. Stern could give Edwards his endorsement -- in the best of all possible worlds --if the Senator promised to run to reform the FCC, for the better. This would have to be done on the morning show tommorrow in time to make a difference in the Super Tuesday primary. Time is of the essence here.
Other than that, Nader could possibly swoop in and make the promise and get the Stern endorsement (*recoils in horror*).
There is no doubt that this election will be one part economy, and one part cultural, with Stern on the one side, and Mel Gibson on the other, representing the twin polarities of our democractic life. Bush congenitally plays the culture card when the economy tanks, just like his daddy and the "Flag desecration" amendment.
Note to John Edwards: Make this happen.
A Little of The Old In and Out
In:
Not that I have anything against it (I'm not) -- but I'm curious about the culural significance of The Rise of White Africans as I, myself, am a black African-born blogger. First, there was the exotic Theresa Heinz, all over the cultural landscape, and now, out of nowhere, Charlize Theron. What's up, buttercup?
Out: J-Lo's Tush. According to that significant cultural artifact the National Enquirer:
"Dr. Richard Fleming, codirector of the Beverly Hills Institute of Aesthetic and Reconstructive Surgery, told Planet Tab: 'Hollywood thrives on youthfulness and influences how people all over the world judge beauty. And we're always surprised by our patients' top picks of celebrity features.
"'Jennifer Lopez's lips are still considered appealing, but last year everyone wanted her butt - which now, no one ever asks for. That was last year's look.
"'While a huge percentage of patients want to look like the strong classic beauties, such as Catherine Zeta- Jones and Charlize Theron, there are always those who request to look like the celebrities who might not be classic beauties, but are hot at the moment.'"
In: Bill Murray. Always In.
Out:
Silly little freak and disgraced African American journo Jayson Blair's memoir of which, editornadpublisher.com writes, "the Daily News' Paul D. Colford pounced on (the memoir's bits), such as: 'Zuza [my girlfriend] took pictures of me prancing around the newsroom wearing a Persian head wrap that covered my face, Kermit the Frog on my shoulders and a giant fake fur coat. I did a full tour de newsroom in this peculiar uniform. It is hard to know what I was feeling, other than it was exhilarating to shock everyone. Perhaps I was crying out for attention.'" Out!
In: Restless former designer/comic book writer/movie pusher/talk show host and snarky asshole Izaac Mizrahi gets a development deal. What the fuck is up with that? Is he going to do a reality show starring FIT students vying for a fashion show at the tents in Mid-Manhattan? And--the better question --how will that gain a national NBC audience? Anyhoo: Mizrahi got a deal (more than I can say), which, The Corsair predicts, will be seven figures thrown into the void by NBC, but, ultimately, a mahor windfall by Les Miz.
Out:
Kerry against free speech. Presidential hopeful Senator John Kerry is running on his bandylegs to the political center now that he has all but locked up the nomination, fleeing from Democratic principles such as free speech, in order to short the Bushies push for a "culture war" platform framed by social moderates and evangelicals over issues like gay marriage and The Passion of The Christ. In his center break, Kerry is tossing Stern over the bow like a hot potato. Great going, future President asshole!
In:
Forbes Gets Global and Grows Up. For years the Forbes 500 List looked like an alumni picture from last year's bohemian grove outing. A few years ago, those pasty Princetonians, embarrassed by the lack of billionaires in Africa that were not dictators (laissez faire works!), paired up Africa and the Middle East in their Forbes 500 listing. Well, now they are beginning to get it. Less pink bespectacled flesh and more color: The Corsair approves.
Out:
Robert Novak (link via Romenesko), the maddening CNN personality who has inserted himself into the Valerie Plame Bush administration spy affair. Just name your source, Novak! No one will question your "journalistic principles" (a very 3am in the morning C-Span affair if you ask me) when you save US tax payers millions trying to ferret out the info via legal bills and congressional inquiry.
In:
Not that I have anything against it (I'm not) -- but I'm curious about the culural significance of The Rise of White Africans as I, myself, am a black African-born blogger. First, there was the exotic Theresa Heinz, all over the cultural landscape, and now, out of nowhere, Charlize Theron. What's up, buttercup?
Out: J-Lo's Tush. According to that significant cultural artifact the National Enquirer:
"Dr. Richard Fleming, codirector of the Beverly Hills Institute of Aesthetic and Reconstructive Surgery, told Planet Tab: 'Hollywood thrives on youthfulness and influences how people all over the world judge beauty. And we're always surprised by our patients' top picks of celebrity features.
"'Jennifer Lopez's lips are still considered appealing, but last year everyone wanted her butt - which now, no one ever asks for. That was last year's look.
"'While a huge percentage of patients want to look like the strong classic beauties, such as Catherine Zeta- Jones and Charlize Theron, there are always those who request to look like the celebrities who might not be classic beauties, but are hot at the moment.'"
In: Bill Murray. Always In.
Out:
Silly little freak and disgraced African American journo Jayson Blair's memoir of which, editornadpublisher.com writes, "the Daily News' Paul D. Colford pounced on (the memoir's bits), such as: 'Zuza [my girlfriend] took pictures of me prancing around the newsroom wearing a Persian head wrap that covered my face, Kermit the Frog on my shoulders and a giant fake fur coat. I did a full tour de newsroom in this peculiar uniform. It is hard to know what I was feeling, other than it was exhilarating to shock everyone. Perhaps I was crying out for attention.'" Out!
In: Restless former designer/comic book writer/movie pusher/talk show host and snarky asshole Izaac Mizrahi gets a development deal. What the fuck is up with that? Is he going to do a reality show starring FIT students vying for a fashion show at the tents in Mid-Manhattan? And--the better question --how will that gain a national NBC audience? Anyhoo: Mizrahi got a deal (more than I can say), which, The Corsair predicts, will be seven figures thrown into the void by NBC, but, ultimately, a mahor windfall by Les Miz.
Out:
Kerry against free speech. Presidential hopeful Senator John Kerry is running on his bandylegs to the political center now that he has all but locked up the nomination, fleeing from Democratic principles such as free speech, in order to short the Bushies push for a "culture war" platform framed by social moderates and evangelicals over issues like gay marriage and The Passion of The Christ. In his center break, Kerry is tossing Stern over the bow like a hot potato. Great going, future President asshole!
In:
Forbes Gets Global and Grows Up. For years the Forbes 500 List looked like an alumni picture from last year's bohemian grove outing. A few years ago, those pasty Princetonians, embarrassed by the lack of billionaires in Africa that were not dictators (laissez faire works!), paired up Africa and the Middle East in their Forbes 500 listing. Well, now they are beginning to get it. Less pink bespectacled flesh and more color: The Corsair approves.
Out:
Robert Novak (link via Romenesko), the maddening CNN personality who has inserted himself into the Valerie Plame Bush administration spy affair. Just name your source, Novak! No one will question your "journalistic principles" (a very 3am in the morning C-Span affair if you ask me) when you save US tax payers millions trying to ferret out the info via legal bills and congressional inquiry.
On Bill Murray
Sad day for The Corsair. I'm saddened by the fact that Bill Murray's probable last chance at the Oscars went poof. I'm right now working on Elizabeth Kubler Ross' stages of grief right now. I'm in the Yearning/Searching phase, so it is best that I refrain from bloggin on the topic until I can tranform the bitterness into something more constructive. :(
Sad day for The Corsair. I'm saddened by the fact that Bill Murray's probable last chance at the Oscars went poof. I'm right now working on Elizabeth Kubler Ross' stages of grief right now. I'm in the Yearning/Searching phase, so it is best that I refrain from bloggin on the topic until I can tranform the bitterness into something more constructive. :(
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