Rio Tinto Wants Kissinger To Clean Up Their Mess



Even as we are starting to enjoy the new, "hopey-changey stuff" -- as semi-literate Sarah Palin calls it -- the Old World continues to encroach. We mean, of course, planetary fucker par excellence, Henry "War Criminal" Kissinger (Exaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachment).

Borborygmus are his evils. In Indochina. In Cambodia. In Jill St. John(Averted Gaze). Eras pass; Presidents die; and yet -- he persists.

He fucks the world with a goat-like vigor.

When will this "manscum" die? At the age of 86, Kissinger was recently released from a South Korean hospital. This leads us to ask, metaphysically: Does "Big Evil" have inherently restorative powers? Does the prosperity of people like Don King and Silvio Berlusconi suggest that planetary laws favorable towards the Evil are in operation? Do people like Kissinger ever ponder in the quiet of their soul the karmic implications of their acts?

Probably not.

The Rio Tinto mess involves China and Australia and the ginormous mining giant Rio Tinto ("Fair is foul, and foul is fair: / Hover through the fog and filthy air"). Already as you can see the stage is set for the sicky, no? It involves nationalism -- that gut-level, Patrick Buchananish instinct -- and the lowe manly virtue: "Face."

Rio Tinto rejected a $19.5 billion investment from state-owned Aluminum Corp. of China last summer. Soon after -- with suspicious timing -- an embarrassed China arrested Rio Tinto workers on the charges of "spying." Recrimination can be substituted for spying, to be sure ("Coiled as a serpent round the phallic Tau"). The Australian government has been trying to sort this out, but as they are at the periphery of where the east meets the West -- nearly all alone -- and China's new position in the world is one of "rib-busting ox-strength," things are kind of dodgy. Who could untangle this tingle of geopolitical Black Magic? You guessed it -- Henry Kissinger, who, we cannot fail to note, enjoys a solid reputation among the world's most filthy despots (and we mean that in the kindest way possible). From The Sydney Morning Herald:

Mining giant Rio Tinto has engaged the services of 86-year-old Henry Kissinger to help rebuild the company's bridge to China in the wake of the Stern Hu affair.

As fallout continues from the jailing of Hu and three other Rio Tinto executives in China, it has emerged that the company turned to the former US Secretary of State last year after the collapse of its US$19.5 billion investment deal with Chinalco and the arrests of the executives.

Mr Kissinger has been well known and respected in China since his 1971 meeting with premier Zhou Enlai paved the way for president Richard Nixon's historic meeting with Chairman Mao Zedong the next year.

Rio yesterday declined to comment on Mr Kissinger's role.

But The Age understands that Mr Kissinger has contributed to Rio restoring its relationship with China and continues to be on the company's books.

He is believed to have helped secure a meeting on Rio's behalf with Wang Qishan, a Politburo member who handles many of China's global financial affairs.

Mr Kissinger's role came to light as claims emerged that Rio was told months before the arrests of Hu and his three colleagues of potential ''dodgy dealings'' within its China operations but resisted internal calls for an investigation.

He is glorious in his Evil, Kissinger. Anyway, the Rio Tinto mess at the periphery of where the Western World meets the growing East (namely: China) is calling for the id-abilities, the ungodly Pan-passions of Kissinger. These geostrategic power games at the highest levels, played at by angry little boys pretending to be men, after all need a referee. And who better to referee perhaps the first major corporate-state skirmish between East and West, than the id-Man himself? Who else would have both sides confidence' who else could preside over such infernal rites?