Diana Ross' Jailhouse Fun

"Do you know where you�re going to?
Do you like the things that life is showing you
Where are you going to? Do you know...? "
Mahogany



One might think that a woman who clearly enjoyed fiddling with Lil Kim's silicon enhanced titty might take a little "downtime" in the "big house" in stride. You know, think of it as the perfect time to read A la recherche du temps perdu; or really nail down Vector mathematics. Perish the thought. Diana Ross isn't like most women -- she is diva, hear her roar -- according to the Associated Press:

"Police Chief James Walters gave Diana Ross special treatment while the R&B singer served jail time on a drunken driving charge, the town's police union said.

"Walters allowed Ross to keep a cellular telephone in her jail cell, have food delivered and let her go home in the middle of her sentence, the union said in a 44-page report to public officials that was given to the Greenwich Time.

"'In the situation involving the incarceration of Ms. Ross, I made some poor decisions and accept responsibility for them,' Walters said at a news conference Wednesday. He did not say which decisions he regretted."

Getting caught sucks. Poor guy. Chiefy got starstruck at having Ross in his jail, probably saw Mahogany at an impressionable age, cut her a break, and some sourpuss snitched. Couldn't keep the piehole shut. The Corsair would totally let Ross slide if she happened to his jailcell, never mind the general improbability of someone with our elevated taste (The Corsair wanly sips some Madeira), evident sangfroid (The Corsair trims his cuticles), and roguish good looks ever matriculating as a prison guard in Connecticut. Charmed, I'm sure (Averted Gaze).