Was Madonna a Courtier?



Giddyap, little hoe-sy. (image via nypost)

We somehow imagined at this point in time Madonna, after exhausting all the permutations of self-invention, with her bulbous cache of "Hasselhoff monies," would be living a scandalous, whispered-about existence in Morocco. Or, we could imagine her financing socially inappropriate films in Mallorca. Something along those lines.

But no. (Exaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachement)

Madonna instead settled for the dreams of every marginally intelligent member of the American bourgoisie: The English country house and the attendant lifestyle. How delightfully ... common.

The eminent sociologist VF Calverton called such behavior as indicative of a "colonial complex," or, applying the highest class significance to a previous colonizer (King George's Britain). That may explain in part why those significant cultural artifacts, Soap Operas, are lousy with Brit accents.

Here Madge takes a break from her studiously uninteresting life to catch up with Liz Smith, who, in turn, is taking a well needed break from salivating in print over Rachel Weisz and Julianna Moore.

According to Liz Smith:

"Liz: There's a major equestrian theme in this show, yes?

"Madonna: Yes, I love horses. They are the most beautiful creatures I think I may have been one of Henry the VIII's knights in another life, riding through the great forest."

First of all, there's nothing about Madonna that suggests the Courtier. Courtesan, yes; courtier, no. Sir Thomas Moore mais non, Dinty More, si.