Breakout Performerof the Year: Kristen Wiig. Where did this brilliant performer come from? On the big screen, on SNL each week, in the boldface headlines of Page Six, we spent much of 2011 watching the marvelous Kristen Wiig marvel. Call me?
God, The Corsair wishes Hillary would replace Biden, thus guaratnteeing Obama a lock on Ohio, Pennsylvania and maybe even West Virginia and Arkansas.
President Obama is loyal to a fault, just like George Herbert Walker Bush -- Bush the First. Aides told Bush the First to dump Dan Quayle because, quite frankly, he was a liability. Back in those days, at the Presidential level Indiana was a given for the Republican Party, just like New Jersey is for Democrats (on second hand ..). He added nothing to the ticket. Plus, he was a fucking second class intellect (not a good look in a debate).
But character is destiny. George Bush the First was a Yalie, a preepy and a loyalist. He did not abandon ship. He kept Quayle instead of the much for intellectual former Congressman from New York, Jack Kemp. And Bush lost. And -- to his credit -- he never regretted the principled decision.
Biden's Delaware is alos a lock. Obama, also a loyalist, may regret not "throwing Biden under the bus" when the white working class vote -- which invented the term "thowing under the bus" -- vote en masse against the Obama-Biden Team. Hillary, a loyal Obama cabinet menber who is a hero both internationally and to the white working class, ought to be Obama's running mate. There, I said it.
Digital Player of the Year: Prince AlWaleed bin Talal. This blogger has been covering the digital space since 1999. Prince AlWaleed bin Talal's name has been there since then. He is a skillful investor, but his new stake in Twitter is his cleverest move not the least of which because it provides him some "control" over a microblogging site that is transforming his region, of which Saudi Arabia is not immune. From Foreign Policy:
"When most people want to become involved in Twitter, they open an account. Leave it to Prince AlWaleed bin Talal, the Saudi media mogul who is King Abdullah's nephew, to buy a chunk of the microblogging site. The prince's company announced on Dec. 19 that it was investing $300 million in Twitter, officially bringing the site into the mainstream of the Saudi media scene.
"Rightly or wrongly, social media is perceived as a revolutionary tool in Saudi Arabia -- one of the many factors that contributed to the Arab Spring. The association was so strong that a few days following the Egyptian uprising that brought down Hosni Mubarak, a Saudi official had to deny a rumor that the Saudi king had offered Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg $150 billion to buy his social networking site -- a bargain, the thinking went, if it helped him ward off further revolutions. And indeed, sites like Twitter and Facebook are rapidly growing in the kingdom, precisely because they allow voices that otherwise would not have been able to find an outlet to flourish."Mat we live in interesting times.
this, that everything that can be known about Courtney is now out there. Extraordinarily honest -- maybe too honest. A sample quote: "Actually, these days I’m only interested in plutocrats. Like really, really rich guys. I’m determined to land one sooner or later. My favorite book these days is something called The Filthy Rich Handbook, which I study like the Talmud. The thing is, I think I can be a real asset to a wealthy man." Oh, brother!
Even Bernie Madoff's fuckery couln't tear asunder Team Kedgewick. Both lost quite a bit of money. But their formidable work ethic (ever heard of Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon?) and the fact that Kyra makes $275,000 an episode for The Closer. "We lost hard-earned money that we worked very hard for that was what we thought in a safe place," Kyra said of the loss." It's painful but a lot of people lost a lot more. And we have a lot of things to be grateful for in our life, and we never ever forget that."
fucking thugs on camels storming Tahrir Square was straight out of Fellini. The Egyptian bra beating image which has prompted tens of thousands of women to rise up in protest. That, clearly, is the first runner-up. However, there was no image so intense as Obama's War Room (above) -- in which the President's national security team watched as a special operations team killed Osama bin laden in Pakistan.
|It puts the lotion on its skin|
Creepiest Move of the Year: Jim Carrey's new flame. Perhaps Jim Carrey was telegraphing his mid-life crisis when he channeled his inner creepiness in a masher video for Emma Stone, aged 22, in August. Now he's taken up with a co-ed, one Anastasia Vitkina. Then again, why do we even care?
Runner Up: The Long Island Serial Killer.
"For some time now, this blogger has been impressed with Bloomberg, the media company. As legacy media organizations carefully navigate the Scylla and Charybdis of this digital age, Bloomberg LP, which has a hefty war chest from the days when their terminals alone carried the day, is making smart, carefully calibrated manuevers."
Regarding Al Jazeera English, which exploded early in the year and became thwe most vital news source for the Arab Spring (and now is out CNN-ing CNN in places like Mexico, Africa, the Middle East and South America). In January Brian Stelter of The Times wrote: "While American television networks were scrambling to move reporters and producers into Cairo, the Al Jazeera channels were already there. The other networks have noticed: on the roundtable portion of ABC’s 'This Week' on Sunday, Sam Donaldson looked at an Al Jazeera reporter and said, 'Thank you for what you’re doing.'"
|don't hate the playa, hate the game|
Now he is going to have a morning show on CBS. And, from what we hear, he may not give up his late night show. Positively West Indian is this man's pimp hand.
this blogger wrote:
"32 years Mubarak has been in power. Five Presidents have come and gone in the meanwhile. The prime sin of tyrants -- and they have many -- is that they cannot distinguish when their body begins and the body politic ends. "L'etat, c'est moi!" cried the Sun King, another era's Mubarak. First Tunisia, now Cairo -- I am beginning to wonder if we are not experiencing the end of African Dictator Chic.
"One of my favorite stories is Oedipus Tyrannus, which Aristotle regarded as the ultimate tragedy of the classical era (Hamlet, one might argue, is its modern equivalent). Both deal with political succession, with tyranny. It is an idea that has been with human beings since the dawn of civilization. All serious people regard it as an unnatural, evil institution. And yet it persists."But for how much longer must we endure? This trend of the endangerment of tyrants continued as the year concluded with the death of Kim Jung-il. We await 2012 with baited breath to see how this all continues to play itself out.
Runner Up, Endangered Species of the Year: The global elite. They just didn't get it this year. As the Egyptian riots were reaching their zenith in January and across the West epic unemployment prevailed, this, from Reuters: "The global elite, dining on Norwegian lobster and reindeer at the end of the World Economic Forum on Saturday, felt pretty chipper despite growing concerns about the inequality of the economic recovery." Charmed, I'm sure (Averted Gaze).
That having been said, OWN is underperforming. Even a non-entity like Jenny McCarthy knows when to get the fuck out of Dodge. And while we continue to wish her luck in this endeavor, we cannot help but notice this fact. The only way for Oprah to help OWN, ironically, is to get back in the hosting game.
Runner Up: Conan.
"That's more than 1.2 million copies above its average weekly sales in the most recent six-month period ended Dec. 31, when it had seen its single-copy sales slip 5.1 percent to 1,257,536 out of its total circulation of 3.6 million, according to the Audit Bureau of Circulations. Jann Wenner's Us Weekly sold close to 1 million copies on newsstands with its royals cover."
And speaking of "tentpoles," can this blogger say that as we were liveTweeting the wedding at 4am ET, Pippa Middleton's form-fitting dress -- fucking supersexy -- was more awakening than a thousand cups of coffee. Hundreds of thousands of half-awake men know exactly what we were thinking at the moment Pippa first hit the TV screen. And it was filthy.
|Miss Polly Jean|
Musician of the Year: PJ Harvey. Resolved: women ruled the music charts in 2011 -- Adele, Rihanna, Taylor, Katy, Nicki Minaj all dominated pop. On the more subtle, arty side, musicians like Florence and the Machines, St Vincent and Feist provided the more bohemian soundtrack to our lives.
Cuomo, though Governing as a Centrist, has done a particularly amazing feat: tricked Progressives into thinking he is one of them (although at this year's Huffington Post Game Changers party, there were some protests against his stand on the millionaire's tax). "By force of will and a fierce work ethic, Gov. Cuomo has pulled off the near-impossible with a budget agreement that closes a $10 billion projected deficit without the tax hikes, fees and fiscal gimmicks that have been so common in the past," is how Fred Dicker, another frequent Cuomo critic put it. "Even more breathtakingly, he did it in the face of a spendthrift Legislature that had helped turn New York's government into a joke line on 'Saturday Night Live.' Cuomo's victory holds out the hope of inaugurating a new economic era that reverses the decades of private-sector decline and public-sector expansion that began with Republican Gov. Nelson A. Rockefeller in the early 1960s."
The problem is that Pakistan's ISI are paranoiac. If the ISI were an individual it would be diagnosed with severe psychological problems. They truly believe that India, the world's largest democarcy and a rising power, dreams of a land war with Pakistan. Fucking crazy paranoiac shit, on the real.
And so, like a spouse in a bad marriage but unable to leave for the sake of the kids -- the safety of the planet -- Pakistan's ISI are out best frenemies forever, or at least until the "law-and-order" movement becomes a strong counterbalance.
The Corsair 8th Annual Pirates Awards