Saturday, March 05, 2005

Jacko's Ring on eBay: $150,000 and Counting

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Above: Debbie Rowe: Prince Michael's Babymomma; Low Grade Piece of Ass.

So far the love trinket is going for "150 large," with 45 bids, and a starting bid of 50 G's. We can only guess that she burned through the multimillion dollar settlement faster than "roast possum" and taters at an RV camp.

For those of you who don't know, Debbie Rowe, Jacko's highly ... implausible ex-wife (Averted Gaze) is selling their wedding band, this delicate trinket of their holy matrimony, to "serious bidders only" online.

The lady's is "klassy" -- what can The Corsair say? She most likely says "excuse me," immediately after publicly adjusting her skirts and panties to, "let the air circulate up in there."

Sangroid, this lady posseses, in large amounts; earned, no doubt, from the best finishing schools -- like how she can put out a camp fire while pissing standing up from a distance of 20 paces.

Savoire fair, in that she has the ability to belch her own name on command. Thems good genetics, n'est-ce pas?

According to eBay:

"This is the only wedding ring purchased by the King of Pop, given to Debbie Rowe on their wedding day, November 15th, 1996 in Sydney, Australia. This beautiful ring was given to Debbie and she would love someone to have it who appreciates the beauty and intention in which it was given."

Uhm -- to get white babies? To keep you quiet about the turkey baster incident? What? Logic fails us.

"This ring features a round brilliant cut diamond set in four prongs accented by fourteen round brilliant cut diamonds, five are set in in 3 prong heads and the rest are bead set. There are four tapered baguette diamonds set in two prong heads.

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Above: "... The ring will be accompanied by a certified letter of authenticity."

And the marriage will be accompanied by falseness and profiteering.

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Above: Ladies and gentlemen, please do not wipe your screens. This is Jermaine Jackson. He's just naturally that oily. We believe it to be a glandular condition.

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