A Little Of the Old in And Out



In: Will Smith. Damn him. Verily we would like to unfold robustly this flippant fool. Cuff him about the ears. His shallow, transparent Hollywood friendships with The Cruiser and The Becks (Exaggerated cough suggesting feigned detachment). Those charity golf shmoozes with the Michael Douglas clan. The constantly "on" comedic persona that rankles as all get out. "Willennium," anyone?

But try as we might we cannot stop watching this man's damn films. We just can't quit him. The execrable Legend of Bagger Vance, excluded, of course (Averted Gaze). And we are not alone. As annoying as Will Smith is, he knows how to pick his roles with the jeweler's eye. If you didn't cry like a bitch during "Pursuit of Happyness" then, dear reader, you are a heartless ghoul. From The AP:

"Will Smith owned the Fourth of July again at the box office.

"His superhero tale 'Hancock' pulled in $62.6 million to join past Smith hits that opened as the No. 1 movie over the holiday weekend."

(image via Rebecca Blackwell/AP)

Out: Simon Mann, British Mercenary. Now that Mann has been sentenced to 34 years in a moist, cramped African prison -- thems the breaks, bitch -- for trying, unsuccessfully, to overthrow the government of Equatorial Guinnea with the backing of some shady international businessmen, the story, in all its sordidness, can presently unfold. From The Guardian:

"Simon Mann, the British mercenary who attempted to organise a coup in the West African state of Equatorial Guinea four years ago, was sentenced to 34 years in prison at a court hearing in the capital, Malabo, yesterday. The sentence was two years more than the prosecution asked for.

"Mann, 56, stood in silence as the sentence was read out by Judge Carlos Mangue in the heavily guarded courtroom.

"Another defendant, Lebanese businessman Mohamed Salaam, received a jail sentence of 18 years, while four Equatorial Guinean nationals were given terms of six years each. Another was jailed for one year and one defendant was acquitted.

"Mann was also ordered to pay a fine and compensation to the Equatorial Guinea state totalling around $24m.

"The judge said the long sentence was justified because of the 'seriousness of the crimes' and the weight of evidence. Asked if he had a message for his family, Mann said: 'I love you - and chin up.'"

Nananana; nanananana -- heyheyehey: Goodbye!



(image via huffingtonpost)

In: The Ingrid Betancourt Movie. An attractive French-Columbian ex-model-politician tragically wasting away in a South American prison, emaciated, the beatific look in her forlorn eyes in the passage of Time, her picture-perfect children -- let's face it: The story was made for the movies (or at least a prime time Lifetime special). A solid book deal goes without saying. If you listen closely you can hear the sound of salivating book publishers. From Variety:

"Just one week after 15 hostages were freed by Colombian commandos, Hollywood has come knocking. Several potential projects are already taking shape, and producers have begun tracking down almost everyone involved to make rights deals.

"Rumors are rife that Ingrid Betancourt — taken hostage in 2002 as she ran for president of Colombia — will sign with French lit agent Susannah Lea and seek a major book and movie deal.

"Marc Gonsalves, Keith Stansell and Thomas Howes, the three American contractors freed with her, are back in Texas and mulling their potential rights-deal paydays. D.C.-based McLarty Associates, the consulting powerhouse that helped broker the trio's freedom, has steered the former hostages to meet with United Talent Agency, which has worked with McLarty in the past.

"The trio were captured in 2003 by FARC (the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia)."

More here.