Tuesday, November 02, 2004

A Little of the Old In and Out

In: Modern Day Gladiators. Brad Pitt was in Troy. Colin Farrell will be Alexander. Russell Crowe won an Oscar as Maximus Decimus Meridius in Gladiator. And P Diddy was Gluteus Maximus, according to Page Six:

"MARIAH Carey tells pals she never felt sexy at her wedding to Tommy Mottola back in 1993, so she became a bride again on Sunday night, this time in a sultry dress reminiscent of the one in Madonna's 'Like a Virgin' video.

"Carey swanned into her Halloween bash at Cain as Sean Combs, dressed as a gladiator, jumped on top of his Rolls-Royce screaming, 'Vote or die!' Then he lifted up his gladiator tunic and flashed several photographers."

Oh dear. The Emperor has no panties.

Out: Has John Stewart Jumped the Shark? Just asking. According to USA Today:

"'There have been days when I see what they've done and I say, 'Wow, he's the best media critic I know,' says Tom Rosenstiel, director of the Project for Excellence in Journalism. This year, the Television Critics Association gave Stewart's show, a five-time Emmy winner, its award for best news and information program. And this from Tom Brokaw: 'He sees that the emperor has no clothes, and some of the mainstream media don't have the same 20/20 vision.' Watching his show is 'a little like watching Seinfeld. You just can't get enough.'

"But whenever you become the darling of the very thing you're criticizing, conventional wisdom dictates that you run the danger of losing your edge, which some erstwhile fans say Stewart already has done. And as the comic increasingly plays the role of critic, some media watchers say Stewart risks becoming the kind of overexposed personality he so mercilessly skewers four nights a week."

In: Nursing Possum. Kirstie Alley is from the trailer born. As such, she has a hankering for possum with all the fixins. To be sure. Unfortunately, somewhere along the line, she got a shitload of money. So, her decidedly lowbrow tastes took a rather eccentric turn. Now Kirstie prefers her possum milk fed, to wit, human breast milk fed, according to Page Six:

"...The possum story, told by another former editor, Joanna Molloy, is hard to top. 'I got a call one day from somebody out in L.A. who said, You're never going to believe this, but I was at an event where Kirstie Alley brought her baby pet possum, and she was walking around with this thing, and all of a sudden it starts to go squeak, squeak, squeak. And Kirstie Alley goes, Oooh, ooh, baby, baby. Mommy's here. And she turned to a publicist and said, Say, aren't you nursing a baby right now?"

The Corsair recoils in horror. No, he thinks to himself, although being a publicist in LA is an excersize in humiliation, a daily hymn to nothingness, no one would ... no one could ... naaah ...

" ... The publicist, afraid of the possum's teeth, ended up expressing her breast milk into a bottle, which Alley then fed to the animal. Molloy recalls, 'And I called up the woman herself ? I was like, OK, they're going to laugh me off both coasts, but no story is too crazy to check ? and she said, The answer is yes. I did it and, you know what, I'm proud of it. "

Oh, sweet dear Jesus.

Out: Kirstie Alley. Like you have to ask (see above) . Wild possum just isn't good enough for you, now, is it? (Averted Gaze)

In: Elizabeth Spiers. Ms. Spiers is keeping to her promise to blog more. We found her blog on Christopher Hitchens' -- our old mentor -- attempt to bring Colin Powell low in Foreign Policy riveting reading, went down easy with some Cutty -- who knew Elizabeth got her international relations on? Who knew:

"I just got the November/December issue of Foreign Policy (or The Poor Man's Foreign Affairs, as I like to call it) and there are two headlines above the cover story:

"'The Tragedy of Colin Powell' by CHRISTOPHER HITCHENS, and...

"'HOW BLOGS ARE CHANGING THE WORLD' by Daniel Drezner and Henry Farrell (CAPS EMPHASIS my own)."

Read it here. The Corsair worked for Christopher at The Nation, has gotten drunk with the old lug and deeply, deeply respects him and hopes Saint Chris comes back to the fold, soon.

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